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- Herausgeber: Studienscheiss Verlag
- Kategorie: Gesellschafts- und Liebesromane
- Sprache: Englisch
- Veröffentlichungsjahr: 2023
Satirical quotes for every day Whether in everyday life or on special events: An appropriate quote can save any situation and provide new momentum. How-ever, if you want to stand out from the crowd and show character, you need to demonstrate originality. My suggestion: humor. Brutal-ly truthful and slightly mean humor, to be precise. Instead of tor-menting your fellow human beings with corny positive banter, you can turn the tables and hand out a few snappy sayings. Dry humor disguised as original quotes An atrocious quip at the right time invigorates every relationship, shakes things up and creates a new perspective. It's not about of-fending the other person (at least not permanently), but solely about the surprising impulse and the shared joy of a little blunt-ness. The ultimate collection of satirical quotes The quotes in this book come from writers, politicians, scientists, actors, artists and other important personalities. In short: from suc-cessful people who have achieved great things and developed a passion for sarcastic remarks and subtle jibes. I would like to pass this curious collection on to you. A cheeky quote every day In this book, each day of the year has its own quote. Although I have assigned each quote to a specific date, this does not mean that you have to follow my pre-selection. You can read the book in a criss-cross fashion and remind yourself of your favorite sayings over and over again. I have also categorized the quotes themati-cally so that you can quickly find the most (in)appropriate words for special occasions such as birthdays, weddings or family celebra-tions. A little foretaste 15th January: “An intelligent man sometimes needs to be drunk to spend time with idiots.” - Ernest Hemingway 11th February: “In old age, children are a comfort as long as they don't come to visit you.” - Sarah Bernhardt 18th March: “You never know what's going to happen in this world. I'll just keep my mouth shut. That's a good idea.” - Gertrude Stein 1st April: “In our time there is a lot of talk about irony and humor, especially by people who have never been able to practice it.” - Søren Kierkegaard 4th May: “There may be better air in heaven, but there is certainly better company in hell.” - George Bernard Shaw 27th June: “There are many people I would like to miss right now.” - Tomi Ungerer 4th July: “The men of today are also no longer what they have never been.” - Kylie Minogue 6th August: “Digging a pit for others is exhausting, but it almost always pays off.” - David Herbert Lawrence 26th September: “The best proof of knowledge of human nature is quiet homicidal desires.” - Frank Sinatra 20th October: “Silent people become even more boring when they start talking.” - Jane Austen 15th November: “Gloating is a never-ending source of strength and serenity.” - Frank Billings Kellogg 24th December: “A family reunion is not only the fault of those who host it, but also of those who do not prevent it.” - Karl Kraus Always a proper saying on hand In this book 365 mean quotes are waiting for you so that you can pick up a new dose of dry humor and quick wit every day. The next time you want to "surprise" your partner, have a ready saying for your colleague at the office, or you need a little cheering up your-self, you can open this treasure trove of quotes, read a few lines and then hit the ground running with new energy.
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365 Quotes
for a Daily Dose of
Dry Humor
Tim Reichel
Impact Verlag
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For You
The German National Library lists this publication in the German National Bibliography; detailed bibliographic data is available on the Internet at www.dnb.de.
365 Quotes for a Daily Dose of Dry Humor: Satirical and Sarcastic Sayings for Every Day (Your Daily Dose of Sarcasm and Irony on the Madness of our World Today) by Tim Reichel
Impact Verlag, Studienscheiss GmbH
Oppenhoffallee 143, 52066 Aachen
Managing Director: Dr. Tim Reichel, M. Sc.
Registry court: Local Court Aachen
Registration number: HRB 19105
VAT ID No.: DE295455486
1st edition, December 2023
© 2023 Impact Verlag (an Imprint of Studienscheiss GmbH)
ISBN: 978-3-98597-152-7 Print (Softcover)
ISBN: 978-3-98597-153-4 E-Book (PDF)
ISBN: 978-3-98597-154-1 E-Book (EPUB)
All rights reserved. The contents of this book are protected by copyright. No part of this work may be reproduced in any form or processed by electronic systems without the permission of the publisher.
Copy editing and proofreading: Delia Hansen, Piet Retief
Editor: Hannah Dautzenberg, Aachen
Cover design: Melanie Schwarz, Aachen
Cover illustration: ucla_pucla / shutterstock.com
Photo: Sajoscha Blinn, Bottrop
Manufacturer: Studienscheiss GmbH, Aachen
Printed in Germany
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Preface
Always have a suitable quip in stock
Whether in everyday life or on special occasions: An apt quote can save any situation and provide new momentum in life. However, if you want to stand out from the crowd and show character, you need to be original. Stale proverbs like "Give every day the chance to be the best day of your life" won’t lure even the most loyal of dogs out from his kennel. This is because these well-meant sayings have become boring and predictable – the proverbial cliché. Some even go so far as to describe them as mendacious empty phrases that have lost all meaning in the age of wall tattoos and Facebook slogans.
That’s why I suggest a different approach: humor. Brutally truthful and slightly mean humor, to be precise. Instead of tormenting your fellow human beings with corny positive banter, you can provoke them to deeper thoughts by handing out these little severities. An atrocious quip at the right time invigorates every relationship, shakes things up and creates a new perspective. It’s not about offending the other person (at least not permanently), but solely about the surprising impetus and the unexpected shared joy of a little bluntness.
That’s why I’ve written this book for you and researched, translated and prepared 365 merciless quotes for you which you can use to dispense little pieces of wisdom every day. Use them to bring a breath of fresh air into your own life or to share your loving mischievousness with others. These quotes come from writers, politicians, scientists, actors, artists and other important personalities. In short: from successful people who have achieved great things and developed a passion for sarcastic remarks and subtle satirical jibes. I would like to pass this curious collection on to you so that you can pick up a new daily dose of alternative humor and use it to fight back against the madness of this world every day.
Although I have assigned each quote to a specific date, this does not mean that you have to follow my preselection. You can read the book in a criss-cross fashion and remind yourself of your favorite sayings again and again. I have also clustered the quotes according to themes so that you can quickly find the most suitable words for special occasions such as birthdays, weddings or family celebrations.
In addition to the 365 quotes, I have a little surprise for you. I’ve put together a total of 100 more quotes that unfortunately didn’t make it into this book due to lack of space. On the last page you will find a link to this collection. It will take you to my website where you can register for the gift – free of charge, of course.
Almost every day we deal with people who could do with a little food for thought. We should help them – and the best way to do this is with a little satire. The next time you want to "surprise" your partner, your colleague at the office is annoying or you need a little cheering up yourself, you can open this treasure, read a few lines and then get going with renewed energy. Have fun with it!
Tim Reichel
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January
January 1st
Year: A period of
three hundred and sixty-five disappointments.
Ambrose Bierce
January 2nd
The path to the goal is never straight,
but it’s not crooked either.
In fact, it doesn’t exist at all.
Susan Sontag
January 3rd
If you’re slow, you’ll get there too,
just later than everyone else.
Jesse Owens
January 4th
Other people also want to have a hard time.
We should help them with that.
Paul Watzlawick
January 5th
If you want to help the poor,
demonstrate to them that they can become rich;
prove it by getting rich yourself.
Wallace Wattles
January 6th
I do not believe in progress,
but in the persistence of human stupidity.
Oscar Wilde
January 7th
Two things are infinite:
the universe and human stupidity;
