“The Bottoms” succeeded to
“Hell Row”. Hell Row was a block of thatched, bulging cottages that
stood by the brookside on Greenhill Lane. There lived the colliers
who worked in the little gin-pits two fields away. The brook ran
under the alder trees, scarcely soiled by these small mines, whose
coal was drawn to the surface by donkeys that plodded wearily in a
circle round a gin. And all over the countryside were these same
pits, some of which had been worked in the time of Charles II., the
few colliers and the donkeys burrowing down like ants into the
earth, making queer mounds and little black places among the
corn-fields and the meadows. And the cottages of these coal-miners,
in blocks and pairs here and there, together with odd farms and
homes of the stockingers, straying over the parish, formed the
village of Bestwood.
Then, some sixty years ago, a
sudden change took place, gin-pits were elbowed aside by the large
mines of the financiers. The coal and iron field of Nottinghamshire
and Derbyshire was discovered. Carston, Waite and Co. appeared.
Amid tremendous excitement, Lord Palmerston formally opened the
company’s first mine at Spinney Park, on the edge of Sherwood
Forest.
About this time the notorious
Hell Row, which through growing old had acquired an evil
reputation, was burned down, and much dirt was cleansed away.
Carston, Waite and Co. found they
had struck on a good thing, so, down the valleys of the brooks from
Selby and Nuttall, new mines were sunk, until soon there were six
pits working. From Nuttall, high up on the sandstone among the
woods, the railway ran, past the ruined priory of the Carthusians
and past Robin Hood’s Well, down to Spinney Park, then on to
Minton, a large mine among corn-fields; from Minton across the
farmlands of the valleyside to Bunker’s Hill, branching off there,
and running north to Beggarlee and Selby, that looks over at Crich
and the hills of Derbyshire; six mines like black studs on the
countryside, linked by a loop of fine chain, the railway.
To accommodate the regiments of
miners, Carston, Waite and Co. built the Squares, great quadrangles
of dwellings on the hillside of Bestwood, and then, in the brook
valley, on the site of Hell Row, they erected the Bottoms.
The Bottoms consisted of six
blocks of miners’ dwellings, two rows of three, like the dots on a
blank-six domino, and twelve houses in a block. This double row of
dwellings sat at the foot of the rather sharp slope from Bestwood,
and looked out, from the attic windows at least, on the slow climb
of the valley towards Selby.
The houses themselves were
substantial and very decent. One could walk all round, seeing
little front gardens with auriculas and saxifrage in the shadow of
the bottom block, sweet-williams and pinks in the sunny top block;
seeing neat front windows, little porches, little privet hedges,
and dormer windows for the attics. But that was outside; that was
the view on to the uninhabited parlours of all the colliers’ wives.
The dwelling-room, the kitchen, was at the back of the house,
facing inward between the blocks, looking at a scrubby back garden,
and then at the ash-pits. And between the rows, between the long
lines of ash-pits, went the alley, where the children played and
the women gossiped and the men smoked. So, the actual conditions of
living in the Bottoms, that was so well built and that looked so
nice, were quite unsavoury because people must live in the kitchen,
and the kitchens opened on to that nasty alley of ash-pits.
Mrs. Morel was not anxious to
move into the Bottoms, which was already twelve years old and on
the downward path, when she descended to it from Bestwood. But it
was the best she could do. Moreover, she had an end house in one of
the top blocks, and thus had only one neighbour; on the other side
an extra strip of garden. And, having an end house, she enjoyed a
kind of aristocracy among the other women of the “between” houses,
because her rent was five shillings and sixpence instead of five
shillings a week. But this superiority in station was not much
consolation to Mrs. Morel.
She was thirty-one years old, and
had been married eight years. A rather small woman, of delicate
mould but resolute bearing, she shrank a little from the first
contact with the Bottoms women. She came down in the July, and in
the September expected her third baby.
Her husband was a miner. They had
only been in their new home three weeks when the wakes, or fair,
began. Morel, she knew, was sure to make a holiday of it. He went
off early on the Monday morning, the day of the fair. The two
children were highly excited. William, a boy of seven, fled off
immediately after breakfast, to prowl round the wakes ground,
leaving Annie, who was only five, to whine all morning to go also.
Mrs. Morel did her work. She scarcely knew her neighbours yet, and
knew no one with whom to trust the little girl. So she promised to
take her to the wakes after dinner.
William appeared at half-past
twelve. He was a very active lad, fair-haired, freckled, with a
touch of the Dane or Norwegian about him.
“Can I have my dinner, mother?”
he cried, rushing in with his cap on. “’Cause it begins at
half-past one, the man says so.”
“You can have your dinner as soon
as it’s done,” replied the mother.
“Isn’t it done?” he cried, his
blue eyes staring at her in indignation. “Then I’m goin’ be-out
it.”
“You’ll do nothing of the sort.
It will be done in five minutes. It is only half-past
twelve.”
“They’ll be beginnin’,” the boy
half cried, half shouted.
“You won’t die if they do,” said
the mother. “Besides, it’s only half-past twelve, so you’ve a full
hour.”
The lad began hastily to lay the
table, and directly the three sat down. They were eating
batter-pudding and jam, when the boy jumped off his chair and stood
perfectly stiff. Some distance away could be heard the first small
braying of a merry-go-round, and the tooting of a horn. His face
quivered as he looked at his mother.
“I told you!” he said, running to
the dresser for his cap.
“Take your pudding in your
hand—and it’s only five past one, so you were wrong—you haven’t got
your twopence,” cried the mother in a breath.
The boy came back, bitterly
disappointed, for his twopence, then went off without a word.
“I want to go, I want to go,”
said Annie, beginning to cry.
“Well, and you shall go, whining,
wizzening little stick!” said the mother. And later in the
afternoon she trudged up the hill under the tall hedge with her
child. The hay was gathered from the fields, and cattle were turned
on to the eddish. It was warm, peaceful.
Mrs. Morel did not like the
wakes. There were two sets of horses, one going by steam, one
pulled round by a pony; three organs were grinding, and there came
odd cracks of pistol-shots, fearful screeching of the cocoanut
man’s rattle, shouts of the Aunt Sally man, screeches from the
peep-show lady. The mother perceived her son gazing enraptured
outside the Lion Wallace booth, at the pictures of this famous lion
that had killed a negro and maimed for life two white men. She left
him alone, and went to get Annie a spin of toffee. Presently the
lad stood in front of her, wildly excited.
“You never said you was
coming—isn’t the’ a lot of things?—that lion’s killed three
men—I’ve spent my tuppence—an’ look here.”
He pulled from his pocket two
egg-cups, with pink moss-roses on them.
“I got these from that stall
where y’ave ter get them marbles in them holes. An’ I got these two
in two goes-’aepenny a go-they’ve got moss-roses on, look here. I
wanted these.”
She knew he wanted them for
her.
“H’m!” she said, pleased. “They
are pretty!”
“Shall you carry ’em, ’cause I’m
frightened o’ breakin’ ’em?”
He was tipful of excitement now
she had come, led her about the ground, showed her everything.
Then, at the peep-show, she explained the pictures, in a sort of
story, to which he listened as if spellbound. He would not leave
her. All the time he stuck close to her, bristling with a small
boy’s pride of her. For no other woman looked such a lady as she
did, in her little black bonnet and her cloak. She smiled when she
saw women she knew. When she was tired she said to her son:
“Well, are you coming now, or
later?”
“Are you goin’ a’ready?” he
cried, his face full of reproach.
“Already? It is past four, I
know.”
“What are you goin’ a’ready for?”
he lamented.
“You needn’t come if you don’t
want,” she said.
And she went slowly away with her
little girl, whilst her son stood watching her, cut to the heart to
let her go, and yet unable to leave the wakes. As she crossed the
open ground in front of the Moon and Stars she heard men shouting,
and smelled the beer, and hurried a little, thinking her husband
was probably in the bar.
At about half-past six her son
came home, tired now, rather pale, and somewhat wretched. He was
miserable, though he did not know it, because he had let her go
alone. Since she had gone, he had not enjoyed his wakes.
“Has my dad been?” he
asked.
“No,” said the mother.
“He’s helping to wait at the Moon
and Stars. I seed him through that black tin stuff wi’ holes in, on
the window, wi’ his sleeves rolled up.”
“Ha!” exclaimed the mother
shortly. “He’s got no money. An’ he’ll be satisfied if he gets his
’lowance, whether they give him more or not.”
When the light was fading, and
Mrs. Morel could see no more to sew, she rose and went to the door.
Everywhere was the sound of excitement, the restlessness of the
holiday, that at last infected her. She went out into the side
garden. Women were coming home from the wakes, the children hugging
a white lamb with green legs, or a wooden horse. Occasionally a man
lurched past, almost as full as he could carry. Sometimes a good
husband came along with his family, peacefully. But usually the
women and children were alone. The stay-at-home mothers stood
gossiping at the corners of the alley, as the twilight sank,
folding their arms under their white aprons.
Mrs. Morel was alone, but she was
used to it. Her son and her little girl slept upstairs; so, it
seemed, her home was there behind her, fixed and stable. But she
felt wretched with the coming child. The world seemed a dreary
place, where nothing else would happen for her—at least until
William grew up. But for herself, nothing but this dreary
endurance—till the children grew up. And the children! She could
not afford to have this third. She did not want it. The father was
serving beer in a public house, swilling himself drunk. She
despised him, and was tied to him. This coming child was too much
for her. If it were not for William and Annie, she was sick of it,
the struggle with poverty and ugliness and meanness.
She went into the front garden,
feeling too heavy to take herself out, yet unable to stay indoors.
The heat suffocated her. And looking ahead, the prospect of her
life made her feel as if she were buried alive.
The front garden was a small
square with a privet hedge. There she stood, trying to soothe
herself with the scent of flowers and the fading, beautiful
evening. Opposite her small gate was the stile that led uphill,
under the tall hedge between the burning glow of the cut pastures.
The sky overhead throbbed and pulsed with light. The glow sank
quickly off the field; the earth and the hedges smoked dusk. As it
grew dark, a ruddy glare came out on the hilltop, and out of the
glare the diminished commotion of the fair.
Sometimes, down the trough of
darkness formed by the path under the hedges, men came lurching
home. One young man lapsed into a run down the steep bit that ended
the hill, and went with a crash into the stile. Mrs. Morel
shuddered. He picked himself up, swearing viciously, rather
pathetically, as if he thought the stile had wanted to hurt
him.
She went indoors, wondering if
things were never going to alter. She was beginning by now to
realise that they would not. She seemed so far away from her
girlhood, she wondered if it were the same person walking heavily
up the back garden at the Bottoms as had run so lightly up the
breakwater at Sheerness ten years before.
“What have I to do with it?” she
said to herself. “What have I to do with all this? Even the child I
am going to have! It doesn’t seem as if I were taken into
account.”
Sometimes life takes hold of one,
carries the body along, accomplishes one’s history, and yet is not
real, but leaves oneself as it were slurred over.
“I wait,” Mrs. Morel said to
herself—“I wait, and what I wait for can never come.”
Then she straightened the
kitchen, lit the lamp, mended the fire, looked out the washing for
the next day, and put it to soak. After which she sat down to her
sewing. Through the long hours her needle flashed regularly through
the stuff. Occasionally she sighed, moving to relieve herself. And
all the time she was thinking how to make the most of what she had,
for the children’s sakes.
At half-past eleven her husband
came. His cheeks were very red and very shiny above his black
moustache. His head nodded slightly. He was pleased with
himself.
“Oh! Oh! waitin’ for me, lass?
I’ve bin ’elpin’ Anthony, an’ what’s think he’s gen me? Nowt b’r a
lousy hae’f-crown, an’ that’s ivry penny—”
“He thinks you’ve made the rest
up in beer,” she said shortly.
“An’ I ’aven’t—that I ’aven’t.
You b’lieve me, I’ve ’ad very little this day, I have an’ all.” His
voice went tender. “Here, an’ I browt thee a bit o’ brandysnap, an’
a cocoanut for th’ children.” He laid the gingerbread and the
cocoanut, a hairy object, on the table. “Nay, tha niver said
thankyer for nowt i’ thy life, did ter?”
As a compromise, she picked up
the cocoanut and shook it, to see if it had any milk.
“It’s a good un, you may back yer
life o’ that. I got it fra’ Bill Hodgkisson. ‘Bill,’ I says, ‘tha
non wants them three nuts, does ter? Arena ter for gi’ein’ me one
for my bit of a lad an’ wench?’ ‘I ham, Walter, my lad,’ ’e says;
‘ta’e which on ’em ter’s a mind.’ An’ so I took one, an’ thanked
’im. I didn’t like ter shake it afore ’is eyes, but ’e says, ‘Tha’d
better ma’e sure it’s a good un, Walt.’ An’ so, yer see, I knowed
it was. He’s a nice chap, is Bill Hodgkisson, e’s a nice
chap!”
“A man will part with anything so
long as he’s drunk, and you’re drunk along with him,” said Mrs.
Morel.
“Eh, tha mucky little ’ussy,
who’s drunk, I sh’d like ter know?” said Morel. He was
extraordinarily pleased with himself, because of his day’s helping
to wait in the Moon and Stars. He chattered on.
Mrs. Morel, very tired, and sick
of his babble, went to bed as quickly as possible, while he raked
the fire.
Mrs. Morel came of a good old
burgher family, famous independents who had fought with Colonel
Hutchinson, and who remained stout Congregationalists. Her
grandfather had gone bankrupt in the lace-market at a time when so
many lace-manufacturers were ruined in Nottingham. Her father,
George Coppard, was an engineer—a large, handsome, haughty man,
proud of his fair skin and blue eyes, but more proud still of his
integrity. Gertrude resembled her mother in her small build. But
her temper, proud and unyielding, she had from the Coppards.
George Coppard was bitterly
galled by his own poverty. He became foreman of the engineers in
the dockyard at Sheerness. Mrs. Morel—Gertrude—was the second
daughter. She favoured her mother, loved her mother best of all;
but she had the Coppards’ clear, defiant blue eyes and their broad
brow. She remembered to have hated her father’s overbearing manner
towards her gentle, humorous, kindly-souled mother. She remembered
running over the breakwater at Sheerness and finding the boat. She
remembered to have been petted and flattered by all the men when
she had gone to the dockyard, for she was a delicate, rather proud
child. She remembered the funny old mistress, whose assistant she
had become, whom she had loved to help in the private school. And
she still had the Bible that John Field had given her. She used to
walk home from chapel with John Field when she was nineteen. He was
the son of a well-to-do tradesman, had been to college in London,
and was to devote himself to business.
She could always recall in detail
a September Sunday afternoon, when they had sat under the vine at
the back of her father’s house. The sun came through the chinks of
the vine-leaves and made beautiful patterns, like a lace scarf,
falling on her and on him. Some of the leaves were clean yellow,
like yellow flat flowers.
“Now sit still,” he had cried.
“Now your hair, I don’t know what it is like! It’s as bright as
copper and gold, as red as burnt copper, and it has gold threads
where the sun shines on it. Fancy their saying it’s brown. Your
mother calls it mouse-colour.”
She had met his brilliant eyes,
but her clear face scarcely showed the elation which rose within
her.
“But you say you don’t like
business,” she pursued.
“I don’t. I hate it!” he cried
hotly.
“And you would like to go into
the ministry,” she half implored.
“I should. I should love it, if I
thought I could make a first-rate preacher.”
“Then why don’t you—why don’t
you?” Her voice rang with defiance. “If I were a man, nothing would
stop me.”
She held her head erect. He was
rather timid before her.
“But my father’s so stiff-necked.
He means to put me into the business, and I know he’ll do
it.”
“But if you’re a man?” she had
cried.
“Being a man isn’t everything,”
he replied, frowning with puzzled helplessness.
Now, as she moved about her work
at the Bottoms, with some experience of what being a man meant, she
knew that it was not everything.
At twenty, owing to her health,
she had left Sheerness. Her father had retired home to Nottingham.
John Field’s father had been ruined; the son had gone as a teacher
in Norwood. She did not hear of him until, two years later, she
made determined inquiry. He had married his landlady, a woman of
forty, a widow with property.
And still Mrs. Morel preserved
John Field’s Bible. She did not now believe him to be—— Well, she
understood pretty well what he might or might not have been. So she
preserved his Bible, and kept his memory intact in her heart, for
her own sake. To her dying day, for thirty-five years, she did not
speak of him.
When she was twenty-three years
old, she met, at a Christmas party, a young man from the Erewash
Valley. Morel was then twenty-seven years old. He was well set-up,
erect, and very smart. He had wavy black hair that shone again, and
a vigorous black beard that had never been shaved. His cheeks were
ruddy, and his red, moist mouth was noticeable because he laughed
so often and so heartily. He had that rare thing, a rich, ringing
laugh. Gertrude Coppard had watched him, fascinated. He was so full
of colour and animation, his voice ran so easily into comic
grotesque, he was so ready and so pleasant with everybody. Her own
father had a rich fund of humour, but it was satiric. This man’s
was different: soft, non-intellectual, warm, a kind of
gambolling.
She herself was opposite. She had
a curious, receptive mind which found much pleasure and amusement
in listening to other folk. She was clever in leading folk to talk.
She loved ideas, and was considered very intellectual. What she
liked most of all was an argument on religion or philosophy or
politics with some educated man. This she did not often enjoy. So
she always had people tell her about themselves, finding her
pleasure so.
In her person she was rather
small and delicate, with a large brow, and dropping bunches of
brown silk curls. Her blue eyes were very straight, honest, and
searching. She had the beautiful hands of the Coppards. Her dress
was always subdued. She wore dark blue silk, with a peculiar silver
chain of silver scallops. This, and a heavy brooch of twisted gold,
was her only ornament. She was still perfectly intact, deeply
religious, and full of beautiful candour.
Walter Morel seemed melted away
before her. She was to the miner that thing of mystery and
fascination, a lady. When she spoke to him, it was with a southern
pronunciation and a purity of English which thrilled him to hear.
She watched him. He danced well, as if it were natural and joyous
in him to dance. His grandfather was a French refugee who had
married an English barmaid—if it had been a marriage. Gertrude
Coppard watched the young miner as he danced, a certain subtle
exultation like glamour in his movement, and his face the flower of
his body, ruddy, with tumbled black hair, and laughing alike
whatever partner he bowed above. She thought him rather wonderful,
never having met anyone like him. Her father was to her the type of
all men. And George Coppard, proud in his bearing, handsome, and
rather bitter; who preferred theology in reading, and who drew near
in sympathy only to one man, the Apostle Paul; who was harsh in
government, and in familiarity ironic; who ignored all sensuous
pleasure:—he was very different from the miner. Gertrude herself
was rather contemptuous of dancing; she had not the slightest
inclination towards that accomplishment, and had never learned even
a Roger de Coverley. She was puritan, like her father, high-minded,
and really stern. Therefore the dusky, golden softness of this
man’s sensuous flame of life, that flowed off his flesh like the
flame from a candle, not baffled and gripped into incandescence by
thought and spirit as her life was, seemed to her something
wonderful, beyond her.
He came and bowed above her. A
warmth radiated through her as if she had drunk wine.
“Now do come and have this one
wi’ me,” he said caressively. “It’s easy, you know. I’m pining to
see you dance.”
She had told him before she could
not dance. She glanced at his humility and smiled. Her smile was
very beautiful. It moved the man so that he forgot
everything.
“No, I won’t dance,” she said
softly. Her words came clean and ringing.
Not knowing what he was doing—he
often did the right thing by instinct—he sat beside her, inclining
reverentially.
“But you mustn’t miss your
dance,” she reproved.
“Nay, I don’t want to dance
that—it’s not one as I care about.”
“Yet you invited me to it.”
He laughed very heartily at
this.
“I never thought o’ that. Tha’rt
not long in taking the curl out of me.”
It was her turn to laugh
quickly.
“You don’t look as if you’d come
much uncurled,” she said.
“I’m like a pig’s tail, I curl
because I canna help it,” he laughed, rather boisterously.
“And you are a miner!” she
exclaimed in surprise.
“Yes. I went down when I was
ten.”
She looked at him in wondering
dismay.
“When you were ten! And wasn’t it
very hard?” she asked.
“You soon get used to it. You
live like th’ mice, an’ you pop out at night to see what’s going
on.”
“It makes me feel blind,” she
frowned.
“Like a moudiwarp!” he laughed.
“Yi, an’ there’s some chaps as does go round like moudiwarps.” He
thrust his face forward in the blind, snout-like way of a mole,
seeming to sniff and peer for direction. “They dun though!” he
protested naïvely. “Tha niver seed such a way they get in. But tha
mun let me ta’e thee down some time, an’ tha can see for
thysen.”
She looked at him, startled. This
was a new tract of life suddenly opened before her. She realised
the life of the miners, hundreds of them toiling below earth and
coming up at evening. He seemed to her noble. He risked his life
daily, and with gaiety. She looked at him, with a touch of appeal
in her pure humility.
“Shouldn’t ter like it?” he asked
tenderly. “’Appen not, it ’ud dirty thee.”
She had never been “thee’d” and
“thou’d” before.
The next Christmas they were
married, and for three months she was perfectly happy: for six
months she was very happy.
He had signed the pledge, and
wore the blue ribbon of a tee-totaller: he was nothing if not
showy. They lived, she thought, in his own house. It was small, but
convenient enough, and quite nicely furnished, with solid, worthy
stuff that suited her honest soul. The women, her neighbours, were
rather foreign to her, and Morel’s mother and sisters were apt to
sneer at her ladylike ways. But she could perfectly well live by
herself, so long as she had her husband close.
Sometimes, when she herself
wearied of love-talk, she tried to open her heart seriously to him.
She saw him listen deferentially, but without understanding. This
killed her efforts at a finer intimacy, and she had flashes of
fear. Sometimes he was restless of an evening: it was not enough
for him just to be near her, she realised. She was glad when he set
himself to little jobs.
He was a remarkably handy
man—could make or mend anything. So she would say:
“I do like that coal-rake of your
mother’s—it is small and natty.”
“Does ter, my wench? Well, I made
that, so I can make thee one!”
“What! why, it’s a steel
one!”
“An’ what if it is! Tha s’lt ha’e
one very similar, if not exactly same.”
She did not mind the mess, nor
the hammering and noise. He was busy and happy.
But in the seventh month, when
she was brushing his Sunday coat, she felt papers in the breast
pocket, and, seized with a sudden curiosity, took them out to read.
He very rarely wore the frock-coat he was married in: and it had
not occurred to her before to feel curious concerning the papers.
They were the bills of the household furniture, still unpaid.
“Look here,” she said at night,
after he was washed and had had his dinner. “I found these in the
pocket of your wedding-coat. Haven’t you settled the bills
yet?”
“No. I haven’t had a
chance.”
“But you told me all was paid. I
had better go into Nottingham on Saturday and settle them. I don’t
like sitting on another man’s chairs and eating from an unpaid
table.”
He did not answer.
“I can have your bank-book, can’t
I?”
“Tha can ha’e it, for what good
it’ll be to thee.”
“I thought—” she began. He had
told her he had a good bit of money left over. But she realised it
was no use asking questions. She sat rigid with bitterness and
indignation.
The next day she went down to see
his mother.
“Didn’t you buy the furniture for
Walter?” she asked.
“Yes, I did,” tartly retorted the
elder woman.
“And how much did he give you to
pay for it?”
The elder woman was stung with
fine indignation.
“Eighty pound, if you’re so keen
on knowin’,” she replied.
“Eighty pounds! But there are
forty-two pounds still owing!”
“I can’t help that.”
“But where has it all
gone?”
“You’ll find all the papers, I
think, if you look—beside ten pound as he owed me, an’ six pound as
the wedding cost down here.”
“Six pounds!” echoed Gertrude
Morel. It seemed to her monstrous that, after her own father had
paid so heavily for her wedding, six pounds more should have been
squandered in eating and drinking at Walter’s parents’ house, at
his expense.
“And how much has he sunk in his
houses?” she asked.
“His houses—which houses?”
Gertrude Morel went white to the
lips. He had told her the house he lived in, and the next one, was
his own.
“I thought the house we live in—”
she began.
“They’re my houses, those two,”
said the mother-in-law. “And not clear either. It’s as much as I
can do to keep the mortgage interest paid.”
Gertrude sat white and silent.
She was her father now.
“Then we ought to be paying you
rent,” she said coldly.
“Walter is paying me rent,”
replied the mother.
“And what rent?” asked
Gertrude.
“Six and six a week,” retorted
the mother.
It was more than the house was
worth. Gertrude held her head erect, looked straight before
her.
“It is lucky to be you,” said the
elder woman, bitingly, “to have a husband as takes all the worry of
the money, and leaves you a free hand.”
The young wife was silent.
She said very little to her
husband, but her manner had changed towards him. Something in her
proud, honourable soul had crystallised out hard as rock.
When October came in, she thought
only of Christmas. Two years ago, at Christmas, she had met him.
Last Christmas she had married him. This Christmas she would bear
him a child.
“You don’t dance yourself, do
you, missis?” asked her nearest neighbour, in October, when there
was great talk of opening a dancing-class over the Brick and Tile
Inn at Bestwood.
“No—I never had the least
inclination to,” Mrs. Morel replied.
“Fancy! An’ how funny as you
should ha’ married your Mester. You know he’s quite a famous one
for dancing.”
“I didn’t know he was famous,”
laughed Mrs. Morel.
“Yea, he is though! Why, he ran
that dancing-class in the Miners’ Arms club-room for over five
year.”
“Did he?”
“Yes, he did.” The other woman
was defiant. “An’ it was thronged every Tuesday, and Thursday, an’
Sat’day—an’ there was carryin’s-on, accordin’ to all
accounts.”
This kind of thing was gall and
bitterness to Mrs. Morel, and she had a fair share of it. The women
did not spare her, at first; for she was superior, though she could
not help it.
He began to be rather late in
coming home.
“They’re working very late now,
aren’t they?” she said to her washer-woman.
“No later than they allers do, I
don’t think. But they stop to have their pint at Ellen’s, an’ they
get talkin’, an’ there you are! Dinner stone cold—an’ it serves ’em
right.”
“But Mr. Morel does not take any
drink.”
The woman dropped the clothes,
looked at Mrs. Morel, then went on with her work, saying
nothing.
Gertrude Morel was very ill when
the boy was born. Morel was good to her, as good as gold. But she
felt very lonely, miles away from her own people. She felt lonely
with him now, and his presence only made it more intense.
The boy was small and frail at
first, but he came on quickly. He was a beautiful child, with dark
gold ringlets, and dark-blue eyes which changed gradually to a
clear grey. His mother loved him passionately. He came just when
her own bitterness of disillusion was hardest to bear; when her
faith in life was shaken, and her soul felt dreary and lonely. She
made much of the child, and the father was jealous.
At last Mrs. Morel despised her
husband. She turned to the child; she turned from the father. He
had begun to neglect her; the novelty of his own home was gone. He
had no grit, she said bitterly to herself. What he felt just at the
minute, that was all to him. He could not abide by anything. There
was nothing at the back of all his show.
There began a battle between the
husband and wife—a fearful, bloody battle that ended only with the
death of one. She fought to make him undertake his own
responsibilities, to make him fulfill his obligations. But he was
too different from her. His nature was purely sensuous, and she
strove to make him moral, religious. She tried to force him to face
things. He could not endure it—it drove him out of his mind.
While the baby was still tiny,
the father’s temper had become so irritable that it was not to be
trusted. The child had only to give a little trouble when the man
began to bully. A little more, and the hard hands of the collier
hit the baby. Then Mrs. Morel loathed her husband, loathed him for
days; and he went out and drank; and she cared very little what he
did. Only, on his return, she scathed him with her satire.
The estrangement between them
caused him, knowingly or unknowingly, grossly to offend her where
he would not have done.
William was only one year old,
and his mother was proud of him, he was so pretty. She was not well
off now, but her sisters kept the boy in clothes. Then, with his
little white hat curled with an ostrich feather, and his white
coat, he was a joy to her, the twining wisps of hair clustering
round his head. Mrs. Morel lay listening, one Sunday morning, to
the chatter of the father and child downstairs. Then she dozed off.
When she came downstairs, a great fire glowed in the grate, the
room was hot, the breakfast was roughly laid, and seated in his
armchair, against the chimney-piece, sat Morel, rather timid; and
standing between his legs, the child—cropped like a sheep, with
such an odd round poll—looking wondering at her; and on a newspaper
spread out upon the hearthrug, a myriad of crescent-shaped curls,
like the petals of a marigold scattered in the reddening
firelight.
Mrs. Morel stood still. It was
her first baby. She went very white, and was unable to speak.
“What dost think o’ ’im?” Morel
laughed uneasily.
She gripped her two fists, lifted
them, and came forward. Morel shrank back.
“I could kill you, I could!” she
said. She choked with rage, her two fists uplifted.
“Yer non want ter make a wench on
’im,” Morel said, in a frightened tone, bending his head to shield
his eyes from hers. His attempt at laughter had vanished.
The mother looked down at the
jagged, close-clipped head of her child. She put her hands on his
hair, and stroked and fondled his head.
“Oh—my boy!” she faltered. Her
lip trembled, her face broke, and, snatching up the child, she
buried her face in his shoulder and cried painfully. She was one of
those women who cannot cry; whom it hurts as it hurts a man. It was
like ripping something out of her, her sobbing.
Morel sat with his elbows on his
knees, his hands gripped together till the knuckles were white. He
gazed in the fire, feeling almost stunned, as if he could not
breathe.
Presently she came to an end,
soothed the child and cleared away the breakfast-table. She left
the newspaper, littered with curls, spread upon the hearthrug. At
last her husband gathered it up and put it at the back of the fire.
She went about her work with closed mouth and very quiet. Morel was
subdued. He crept about wretchedly, and his meals were a misery
that day. She spoke to him civilly, and never alluded to what he
had done. But he felt something final had happened.
Afterwards she said she had been
silly, that the boy’s hair would have had to be cut, sooner or
later. In the end, she even brought herself to say to her husband
it was just as well he had played barber when he did. But she knew,
and Morel knew, that that act had caused something momentous to
take place in her soul. She remembered the scene all her life, as
one in which she had suffered the most intensely.
This act of masculine clumsiness
was the spear through the side of her love for Morel. Before, while
she had striven against him bitterly, she had fretted after him, as
if he had gone astray from her. Now she ceased to fret for his
love: he was an outsider to her. This made life much more
bearable.
Nevertheless, she still continued
to strive with him. She still had her high moral sense, inherited
from generations of Puritans. It was now a religious instinct, and
she was almost a fanatic with him, because she loved him, or had
loved him. If he sinned, she tortured him. If he drank, and lied,
was often a poltroon, sometimes a knave, she wielded the lash
unmercifully.
The pity was, she was too much
his opposite. She could not be content with the little he might be;
she would have him the much that he ought to be. So, in seeking to
make him nobler than he could be, she destroyed him. She injured
and hurt and scarred herself, but she lost none of her worth. She
also had the children.
He drank rather heavily, though
not more than many miners, and always beer, so that whilst his
health was affected, it was never injured. The week-end was his
chief carouse. He sat in the Miners’ Arms until turning-out time
every Friday, every Saturday, and every Sunday evening. On Monday
and Tuesday he had to get up and reluctantly leave towards ten
o’clock. Sometimes he stayed at home on Wednesday and Thursday
evenings, or was only out for an hour. He practically never had to
miss work owing to his drinking.
But although he was very steady
at work, his wages fell off. He was blab-mouthed, a tongue-wagger.
Authority was hateful to him, therefore he could only abuse the
pit-managers. He would say, in the Palmerston:
“Th’ gaffer come down to our
stall this morning, an’ ’e says, ‘You know, Walter, this ’ere’ll
not do. What about these props?’ An’ I says to him, ‘Why, what art
talkin’ about? What d’st mean about th’ props?’ ‘It’ll never do,
this ’ere,’ ’e says. ‘You’ll be havin’ th’ roof in, one o’ these
days.’ An’ I says, ‘Tha’d better stan’ on a bit o’ clunch, then,
an’ hold it up wi’ thy ’ead.’ So ’e wor that mad, ’e cossed an’ ’e
swore, an’ t’other chaps they did laugh.” Morel was a good mimic.
He imitated the manager’s fat, squeaky voice, with its attempt at
good English.
“‘I shan’t have it, Walter. Who
knows more about it, me or you?’ So I says, ‘I’ve niver fun out how
much tha’ knows, Alfred. It’ll ’appen carry thee ter bed an’
back.’”
So Morel would go on to the
amusement of his boon companions. And some of this would be true.
The pit-manager was not an educated man. He had been a boy along
with Morel, so that, while the two disliked each other, they more
or less took each other for granted. But Alfred Charlesworth did
not forgive the butty these public-house sayings. Consequently,
although Morel was a good miner, sometimes earning as much as five
pounds a week when he married, he came gradually to have worse and
worse stalls, where the coal was thin, and hard to get, and
unprofitable.
Also, in summer, the pits are
slack. Often, on bright sunny mornings, the men are seen trooping
home again at ten, eleven, or twelve o’clock. No empty trucks stand
at the pit-mouth. The women on the hillside look across as they
shake the hearthrug against the fence, and count the wagons the
engine is taking along the line up the valley. And the children, as
they come from school at dinner-time, looking down the fields and
seeing the wheels on the headstocks standing, say:
“Minton’s knocked off. My dad’ll
be at home.”
And there is a sort of shadow
over all, women and children and men, because money will be short
at the end of the week.
Morel was supposed to give his
wife thirty shillings a week, to provide everything—rent, food,
clothes, clubs, insurance, doctors. Occasionally, if he were flush,
he gave her thirty-five. But these occasions by no means balanced
those when he gave her twenty-five. In winter, with a decent stall,
the miner might earn fifty or fifty-five shillings a week. Then he
was happy. On Friday night, Saturday, and Sunday, he spent royally,
getting rid of his sovereign or thereabouts. And out of so much, he
scarcely spared the children an extra penny or bought them a pound
of apples. It all went in drink. In the bad times, matters were
more worrying, but he was not so often drunk, so that Mrs. Morel
used to say:
“I’m not sure I wouldn’t rather
be short, for when he’s flush, there isn’t a minute of
peace.”
If he earned forty shillings he
kept ten; from thirty-five he kept five; from thirty-two he kept
four; from twenty-eight he kept three; from twenty-four he kept
two; from twenty he kept one-and-six; from eighteen he kept a
shilling; from sixteen he kept sixpence. He never saved a penny,
and he gave his wife no opportunity of saving; instead, she had
occasionally to pay his debts; not public-house debts, for those
never were passed on to the women, but debts when he had bought a
canary, or a fancy walking-stick.
At the wakes time Morel was
working badly, and Mrs. Morel was trying to save against her
confinement. So it galled her bitterly to think he should be out
taking his pleasure and spending money, whilst she remained at
home, harassed. There were two days holiday. On the Tuesday morning
Morel rose early. He was in good spirits. Quite early, before six
o’clock, she heard him whistling away to himself downstairs. He had
a pleasant way of whistling, lively and musical. He nearly always
whistled hymns. He had been a choir-boy with a beautiful voice, and
had taken solos in Southwell cathedral. His morning whistling alone
betrayed it.
His wife lay listening to him
tinkering away in the garden, his whistling ringing out as he sawed
and hammered away. It always gave her a sense of warmth and peace
to hear him thus as she lay in bed, the children not yet awake, in
the bright early morning, happy in his man’s fashion.
At nine o’clock, while the
children with bare legs and feet were sitting playing on the sofa,
and the mother was washing up, he came in from his carpentry, his
sleeves rolled up, his waistcoat hanging open. He was still a
good-looking man, with black, wavy hair, and a large black
moustache. His face was perhaps too much inflamed, and there was
about him a look almost of peevishness. But now he was jolly. He
went straight to the sink where his wife was washing up.
“What, are thee there!” he said
boisterously. “Sluthe off an’ let me wesh mysen.”
“You may wait till I’ve
finished,” said his wife.
“Oh, mun I? An’ what if I
shonna?”
This good-humoured threat amused
Mrs. Morel.
“Then you can go and wash
yourself in the soft-water tub.”
“Ha! I can’ an’ a’, tha mucky
little ’ussy.”
With which he stood watching her
a moment, then went away to wait for her.
When he chose he could still make
himself again a real gallant. Usually he preferred to go out with a
scarf round his neck. Now, however, he made a toilet. There seemed
so much gusto in the way he puffed and swilled as he washed
himself, so much alacrity with which he hurried to the mirror in
the kitchen, and, bending because it was too low for him,
scrupulously parted his wet black hair, that it irritated Mrs.
Morel. He put on a turn-down collar, a black bow, and wore his
Sunday tail-coat. As such, he looked spruce, and what his clothes
would not do, his instinct for making the most of his good looks
would.
At half-past nine Jerry Purdy
came to call for his pal. Jerry was Morel’s bosom friend, and Mrs.
Morel disliked him. He was a tall, thin man, with a rather foxy
face, the kind of face that seems to lack eyelashes. He walked with
a stiff, brittle dignity, as if his head were on a wooden spring.
His nature was cold and shrewd. Generous where he intended to be
generous, he seemed to be very fond of Morel, and more or less to
take charge of him.
Mrs. Morel hated him. She had
known his wife, who had died of consumption, and who had, at the
end, conceived such a violent dislike of her husband, that if he
came into her room it caused her hæmorrhage. None of which Jerry
had seemed to mind. And now his eldest daughter, a girl of fifteen,
kept a poor house for him, and looked after the two younger
children.
“A mean, wizzen-hearted stick!”
Mrs. Morel said of him.
“I’ve never known Jerry mean in
my life,” protested Morel. “A opener-handed and more freer chap you
couldn’t find anywhere, accordin’ to my knowledge.”
“Open-handed to you,” retorted
Mrs. Morel. “But his fist is shut tight enough to his children,
poor things.”
“Poor things! And what for are
they poor things, I should like to know.”
But Mrs. Morel would not be
appeased on Jerry’s score.
The subject of argument was seen,
craning his thin neck over the scullery curtain. He caught Mrs.
Morel’s eye.
“Mornin’, missis! Mester
in?”
“Yes—he is.”
Jerry entered unasked, and stood
by the kitchen doorway. He was not invited to sit down, but stood
there, coolly asserting the rights of men and husbands.
“A nice day,” he said to Mrs.
Morel.
“Yes.
“Grand out this morning—grand for
a walk.”
“Do you mean you’re going for a
walk?” she asked.
“Yes. We mean walkin’ to
Nottingham,” he replied.
“H’m!”
The two men greeted each other,
both glad: Jerry, however, full of assurance, Morel rather subdued,
afraid to seem too jubilant in presence of his wife. But he laced
his boots quickly, with spirit. They were going for a ten-mile walk
across the fields to Nottingham. Climbing the hillside from the
Bottoms, they mounted gaily into the morning. At the Moon and Stars
they had their first drink, then on to the Old Spot. Then a long
five miles of drought to carry them into Bulwell to a glorious pint
of bitter. But they stayed in a field with some haymakers whose
gallon bottle was full, so that, when they came in sight of the
city, Morel was sleepy. The town spread upwards before them,
smoking vaguely in the midday glare, fridging the crest away to the
south with spires and factory bulks and chimneys. In the last field
Morel lay down under an oak tree and slept soundly for over an
hour. When he rose to go forward he felt queer.
The two had dinner in the
Meadows, with Jerry’s sister, then repaired to the Punch Bowl,
where they mixed in the excitement of pigeon-racing. Morel never in
his life played cards, considering them as having some occult,
malevolent power—“the devil’s pictures,” he called them! But he was
a master of skittles and of dominoes. He took a challenge from a
Newark man, on skittles. All the men in the old, long bar took
sides, betting either one way or the other. Morel took off his
coat. Jerry held the hat containing the money. The men at the
tables watched. Some stood with their mugs in their hands. Morel
felt his big wooden ball carefully, then launched it. He played
havoc among the nine-pins, and won half a crown, which restored him
to solvency.
By seven o’clock the two were in
good condition. They caught the 7.30 train home.
In the afternoon the Bottoms was
intolerable. Every inhabitant remaining was out of doors. The
women, in twos and threes, bareheaded and in white aprons, gossiped
in the alley between the blocks. Men, having a rest between drinks,
sat on their heels and talked. The place smelled stale; the slate
roofs glistered in the arid heat.
Mrs. Morel took the little girl
down to the brook in the meadows, which were not more than two
hundred yards away. The water ran quickly over stones and broken
pots. Mother and child leaned on the rail of the old sheep-bridge,
watching. Up at the dipping-hole, at the other end of the meadow,
Mrs. Morel could see the naked forms of boys flashing round the
deep yellow water, or an occasional bright figure dart glittering
over the blackish stagnant meadow. She knew William was at the
dipping-hole, and it was the dread of her life lest he should get
drowned. Annie played under the tall old hedge, picking up alder
cones, that she called currants. The child required much attention,
and the flies were teasing.
The children were put to bed at
seven o’clock. Then she worked awhile.
When Walter Morel and Jerry
arrived at Bestwood they felt a load off their minds; a railway
journey no longer impended, so they could put the finishing touches
to a glorious day. They entered the Nelson with the satisfaction of
returned travellers.
The next day was a work-day, and
the thought of it put a damper on the men’s spirits. Most of them,
moreover, had spent their money. Some were already rolling dismally
home, to sleep in preparation for the morrow. Mrs. Morel, listening
to their mournful singing, went indoors. Nine o’clock passed, and
ten, and still “the pair” had not returned. On a doorstep somewhere
a man was singing loudly, in a drawl: “Lead, kindly Light.” Mrs.
Morel was always indignant with the drunken men that they must sing
that hymn when they got maudlin.
“As if ‘Genevieve’ weren’t good
enough,” she said.
The kitchen was full of the scent
of boiled herbs and hops. On the hob a large black saucepan steamed
slowly. Mrs. Morel took a panchion, a great bowl of thick red
earth, streamed a heap of white sugar into the bottom, and then,
straining herself to the weight, was pouring in the liquor.
Just then Morel came in. He had
been very jolly in the Nelson, but coming home had grown irritable.
He had not quite got over the feeling of irritability and pain,
after having slept on the ground when he was so hot; and a bad
conscience afflicted him as he neared the house. He did not know he
was angry. But when the garden gate resisted his attempts to open
it, he kicked it and broke the latch. He entered just as Mrs. Morel
was pouring the infusion of herbs out of the saucepan. Swaying
slightly, he lurched against the table. The boiling liquor pitched.
Mrs. Morel started back.
“Good gracious,” she cried,
“coming home in his drunkenness!”
“Comin’ home in his what?” he
snarled, his hat over his eye.
Suddenly her blood rose in a
jet.
“Say you’re not drunk!” she
flashed.
She had put down her saucepan,
and was stirring the sugar into the beer. He dropped his two hands
heavily on the table, and thrust his face forwards at her.
“‘Say you’re not drunk,’” he
repeated. “Why, nobody but a nasty little bitch like you ’ud ’ave
such a thought.”
He thrust his face forward at
her.
“There’s money to bezzle with, if
there’s money for nothing else.”
“I’ve not spent a two-shillin’
bit this day,” he said.
“You don’t get as drunk as a lord
on nothing,” she replied. “And,” she cried, flashing into sudden
fury, “if you’ve been sponging on your beloved Jerry, why, let him
look after his children, for they need it.”
“It’s a lie, it’s a lie. Shut
your face, woman.”
They were now at battle-pitch.
Each forgot everything save the hatred of the other and the battle
between them. She was fiery and furious as he. They went on till he
called her a liar.
“No,” she cried, starting up,
scarce able to breathe. “Don’t call me that—you, the most
despicable liar that ever walked in shoe-leather.” She forced the
last words out of suffocated lungs.
“You’re a liar!” he yelled,
banging the table with his fist. “You’re a liar, you’re a
liar.”
She stiffened herself, with
clenched fists.
“The house is filthy with you,”
she cried.
“Then get out on it—it’s mine.
Get out on it!” he shouted. “It’s me as brings th’ money whoam, not
thee. It’s my house, not thine. Then ger out on’t—ger out
on’t!”
“And I would,” she cried,
suddenly shaken into tears of impotence. “Ah, wouldn’t I, wouldn’t
I have gone long ago, but for those children. Ay, haven’t I
repented not going years ago, when I’d only the one”—suddenly
drying into rage. “Do you think it’s for you I stop—do you think
I’d stop one minute for you?”
“Go, then,” he shouted, beside
himself. “Go!”
“No!” She faced round. “No,” she
cried loudly, “you shan’t have it all your own way; you shan’t do
all you like. I’ve got those children to see to. My word,” she
laughed, “I should look well to leave them to you.”
“Go,” he cried thickly, lifting
his fist. He was afraid of her. “Go!”
“I should be only too glad. I
should laugh, laugh, my lord, if I could get away from you,” she
replied.
He came up to her, his red face,
with its bloodshot eyes, thrust forward, and gripped her arms. She
cried in fear of him, struggled to be free. Coming slightly to
himself, panting, he pushed her roughly to the outer door, and
thrust her forth, slotting the bolt behind her with a bang. Then he
went back into the kitchen, dropped into his armchair, his head,
bursting full of blood, sinking between his knees. Thus he dipped
gradually into a stupor, from exhaustion and intoxication.
The moon was high and magnificent
in the August night. Mrs. Morel, seared with passion, shivered to
find herself out there in a great white light, that fell cold on
her, and gave a shock to her inflamed soul. She stood for a few
moments helplessly staring at the glistening great rhubarb leaves
near the door. Then she got the air into her breast. She walked
down the garden path, trembling in every limb, while the child
boiled within her. For a while she could not control her
consciousness; mechanically she went over the last scene, then over
it again, certain phrases, certain moments coming each time like a
brand red-hot down on her soul; and each time she enacted again the
past hour, each time the brand came down at the same points, till
the mark was burnt in, and the pain burnt out, and at last she came
to herself. She must have been half an hour in this delirious
condition. Then the presence of the night came again to her. She
glanced round in fear. She had wandered to the side garden, where
she was walking up and down the path beside the currant bushes
under the long wall. The garden was a narrow strip, bounded from
the road, that cut transversely between the blocks, by a thick
thorn hedge.
She hurried out of the side
garden to the front, where she could stand as if in an immense gulf
of white light, the moon streaming high in face of her, the
moonlight standing up from the hills in front, and filling the
valley where the Bottoms crouched, almost blindingly. There,
panting and half weeping in reaction from the stress, she murmured
to herself over and over again: “The nuisance! the nuisance!”
She became aware of something
about her. With an effort she roused herself to see what it was
that penetrated her consciousness. The tall white lilies were
reeling in the moonlight, and the air was charged with their
perfume, as with a presence. Mrs. Morel gasped slightly in fear.
She touched the big, pallid flowers on their petals, then shivered.
They seemed to be stretching in the moonlight. She put her hand
into one white bin: the gold scarcely showed on her fingers by
moonlight. She bent down to look at the binful of yellow pollen;
but it only appeared dusky. Then she drank a deep draught of the
scent. It almost made her dizzy.
Mrs. Morel leaned on the garden
gate, looking out, and she lost herself awhile. She did not know
what she thought. Except for a slight feeling of sickness, and her
consciousness in the child, herself melted out like scent into the
shiny, pale air. After a time the child, too, melted with her in
the mixing-pot of moonlight, and she rested with the hills and
lilies and houses, all swum together in a kind of swoon.
When she came to herself she was
tired for sleep. Languidly she looked about her; the clumps of
white phlox seemed like bushes spread with linen; a moth
ricochetted over them, and right across the garden. Following it
with her eye roused her. A few whiffs of the raw, strong scent of
phlox invigorated her. She passed along the path, hesitating at the
white rose-bush. It smelled sweet and simple. She touched the white
ruffles of the roses. Their fresh scent and cool, soft leaves
reminded her of the morning-time and sunshine. She was very fond of
them. But she was tired, and wanted to sleep. In the mysterious
out-of-doors she felt forlorn.
There was no noise anywhere.
Evidently the children had not been wakened, or had gone to sleep
again. A train, three miles away, roared across the valley. The
night was very large, and very strange, stretching its hoary
distances infinitely. And out of the silver-grey fog of darkness
came sounds vague and hoarse: a corncrake not far off, sound of a
train like a sigh, and distant shouts of men.
Her quietened heart beginning to
beat quickly again, she hurried down the side garden to the back of
the house. Softly she lifted the latch; the door was still bolted,
and hard against her. She rapped gently, waited, then rapped again.
She must not rouse the children, nor the neighbours. He must be
asleep, and he would not wake easily. Her heart began to burn to be
indoors. She clung to the door-handle. Now it was cold; she would
take a chill, and in her present condition!
Putting her apron over her head
and her arms, she hurried again to the side garden, to the window
of the kitchen. Leaning on the sill, she could just see, under the
blind, her husband’s arms spread out on the table, and his black
head on the board. He was sleeping with his face lying on the
table. Something in his attitude made her feel tired of things. The
lamp was burning smokily; she could tell by the copper colour of
the light. She tapped at the window more and more noisily. Almost
it seemed as if the glass would break. Still he did not wake
up.
After vain efforts, she began to
shiver, partly from contact with the stone, and from exhaustion.
Fearful always for the unborn child, she wondered what she could do
for warmth. She went down to the coal-house, where there was an old
hearthrug she had carried out for the rag-man the day before. This
she wrapped over her shoulders. It was warm, if grimy. Then she
walked up and down the garden path, peeping every now and then
under the blind, knocking, and telling herself that in the end the
very strain of his position must wake him.
At last, after about an hour, she
rapped long and low at the window. Gradually the sound penetrated
to him. When, in despair, she had ceased to tap, she saw him stir,
then lift his face blindly. The labouring of his heart hurt him
into consciousness. She rapped imperatively at the window. He
started awake. Instantly she saw his fists set and his eyes glare.
He had not a grain of physical fear. If it had been twenty
burglars, he would have gone blindly for them. He glared round,
bewildered, but prepared to fight.
“Open the door, Walter,” she said
coldly.
His hands relaxed. It dawned on
him what he had done. His head dropped, sullen and dogged. She saw
him hurry to the door, heard the bolt chock. He tried the latch. It
opened—and there stood the silver-grey night, fearful to him, after
the tawny light of the lamp. He hurried back.
When Mrs. Morel entered, she saw
him almost running through the door to the stairs. He had ripped
his collar off his neck in his haste to be gone ere she came in,
and there it lay with bursten button-holes. It made her
angry.
She warmed and soothed herself.
In her weariness forgetting everything, she moved about at the
little tasks that remained to be done, set his breakfast, rinsed
his pit-bottle, put his pit-clothes on the hearth to warm, set his
pit-boots beside them, put him out a clean scarf and snap-bag and
two apples, raked the fire, and went to bed. He was already dead
asleep. His narrow black eyebrows were drawn up in a sort of
peevish misery into his forehead while his cheeks’ down-strokes,
and his sulky mouth, seemed to be saying: “I don’t care who you are
nor what you are, I shall have my own way.”
Mrs. Morel knew him too well to
look at him. As she unfastened her brooch at the mirror, she smiled
faintly to see her face all smeared with the yellow dust of lilies.
She brushed it off, and at last lay down. For some time her mind
continued snapping and jetting sparks, but she was asleep before
her husband awoke from the first sleep of his drunkenness.