Just So Stories
Just So StoriesHOW THE WHALE GOT HIS THROATHOW THE CAMEL GOT HIS HUMPHOW THE RHINOCEROS GOT HIS SKINHOW THE LEOPARD GOT HIS SPOTSTHE ELEPHANT'S CHILDTHE SING-SONG OF OLD MAN KANGAROOTHE BEGINNING OF THE ARMADILLOSHOW THE FIRST LETTER WAS WRITTENHOW THE ALPHABET WAS MADETHE CRAB THAT PLAYED WITH THE SEATHE CAT THAT WALKED BY HIMSELFTHE BUTTERFLY THAT STAMPEDCopyright
Just So Stories
Rudyard Kipling
HOW THE WHALE GOT HIS THROAT
IN the sea, once upon a time, O my Best Beloved, there was a
Whale, and he ate fishes. He ate the starfish and the garfish, and
the crab and the dab, and the plaice and the dace, and the skate
and his mate, and the mackereel and the pickereel, and the really
truly twirly-whirly eel. All the fishes he could find in all the
sea he ate with his mouth—so! Till at last there was only one small
fish left in all the sea, and he was a small 'Stute Fish, and he
swam a little behind the Whale's right ear, so as to be out of
harm's way. Then the Whale stood up on his tail and said, 'I'm
hungry.' And the small 'Stute Fish said in a small 'stute voice,
'Noble and generous Cetacean, have you ever tasted
Man?''No,' said the Whale. 'What is it like?''Nice,' said the small 'Stute Fish. 'Nice but
nubbly.''Then fetch me some,' said the Whale, and he made the sea
froth up with his tail.'One at a time is enough,' said the 'Stute Fish. 'If you swim
to latitude Fifty North, longitude Forty West (that is magic), you
will find, sittingona
raft,inthe middle of the sea,
with nothing on but a pair of blue canvas breeches, a pair of
suspenders (you mustnotforget
the suspenders, Best Beloved), and a jack-knife, one ship-wrecked
Mariner, who, it is only fair to tell you, is a man of
infinite-resource-and-sagacity.'So the Whale swam and swam to latitude Fifty North, longitude
Forty West, as fast as he could swim, andona raft,inthe middle of the sea,withnothing to wear except a pair of
blue canvas breeches, a pair of suspenders (you must particularly
remember the suspenders, Best Beloved),anda jack-knife, he found one single,
solitary shipwrecked Mariner, trailing his toes in the water. (He
had his mummy's leave to paddle, or else he would never have done
it, because he was a man of
infinite-resource-and-sagacity.)Then the Whale opened his mouth back and back and back till
it nearly touched his tail, and he swallowed the shipwrecked
Mariner, and the raft he was sitting on, and his blue canvas
breeches, and the suspenders (which youmustnot forget),andthe jack-knife—He swallowed them
all down into his warm, dark, inside cup-boards, and then he
smacked his lips—so, and turned round three times on his
tail.But as soon as the Mariner, who was a man of
infinite-resource-and-sagacity, found himself truly inside the
Whale's warm, dark, inside cup-boards, he stumped and he jumped and
he thumped and he bumped, and he pranced and he danced, and he
banged and he clanged, and he hit and he bit, and he leaped and he
creeped, and he prowled and he howled, and he hopped and he
dropped, and he cried and he sighed, and he crawled and he bawled,
and he stepped and he lepped, and he danced hornpipes where he
shouldn't, and the Whale felt most unhappy indeed. (Haveyou forgotten the
suspenders?)So he said to the 'Stute Fish, 'This man is very nubbly, and
besides he is making me hiccough. What shall I do?''Tell him to come out,' said the 'Stute Fish.So the Whale called down his own throat to the shipwrecked
Mariner, 'Come out and behave yourself. I've got the
hiccoughs.''Nay, nay!' said the Mariner. 'Not so, but far otherwise.
Take me to my natal-shore and the white-cliffs-of-Albion, and I'll
think about it.' And he began to dance more than ever.'You had better take him home,' said the 'Stute Fish to the
Whale.'I ought to have warned you that he is a man of
infinite-resource-and-sagacity.'So the Whale swam and swam and swam, with both flippers and
his tail, as hard as he could for the hiccoughs; and at last he saw
the Mariner's natal-shore and the white-cliffs-of-Albion, and he
rushed half-way up the beach, and opened his mouth wide and wide
and wide, and said, 'Change here for Winchester, Ashuelot, Nashua,
Keene, and stations on theFitchburg Road;' and just as he said 'Fitch' the Mariner walked
out of his mouth. But while the Whale had been swimming, the
Mariner, who was indeed a person of infinite-resource-and-sagacity,
had taken his jack-knife and cut up the raft into a little square
grating all running criss-cross, and he had tied it firm with his
suspenders (now, you know why
you were not to forget the suspenders!), and he dragged that
grating good and tight into the Whale's throat, and there it stuck!
Then he recited the followingSloka, which, as you have not heard it, I will now proceed to
relate—By means of a grating I have stopped your ating.For the Mariner he was also an Hi-ber-ni-an. And he stepped
out on the shingle, and went home to his mother, who had given him
leave to trail his toes in the water; and he married and lived
happily ever afterward. So did the Whale. But from that day on, the
grating in his throat, which he could neither cough up nor swallow
down, prevented him eating anything except very, very small fish;
and that is the reason why whales nowadays never eat men or boys or
little girls.The small 'Stute Fish went and hid himself in the mud under
the Door-sills of the Equator. He was afraid that the Whale might
be angry with him.The Sailor took the jack-knife home. He was wearing the blue
canvas breeches when he walked out on the shingle. The suspenders
were left behind, you see, to tie the grating with; and that is the
end ofthattale.WHEN the cabin port-holes are dark
and green Because of the seas
outside; When the ship goeswop(with a wiggle
between) And the steward falls into the
soup-tureen, And the trunks begin to
slide; When Nursey lies on the floor in a
heap, And Mummy tells you to let her
sleep, And you aren't waked or washed or
dressed, Why, then you will know (if you
haven't guessed) You're 'Fifty North and Forty
West!'
HOW THE CAMEL GOT HIS HUMP
NOW this is the next tale, and it tells how the Camel
got his big hump.In the beginning of years, when the world was so new and all,
and the Animals were just beginning to work for Man, there was a
Camel, and he lived in the middle of a Howling Desert because he
did not want to work; and besides, he was a Howler himself. So he
ate sticks and thorns and tamarisks and milkweed and prickles, most
'scruciating idle; and when anybody spoke to him he said 'Humph!'
Just 'Humph!' and no more.Presently the Horse came to him on Monday morning, with a
saddle on his back and a bit in his mouth, and said, 'Camel, O
Camel, come out and trot like the rest of us.''Humph!' said the Camel; and the Horse went away and told the
Man.Presently the Dog came to him, with a stick in his mouth, and
said, 'Camel, O Camel, come and fetch and carry like the rest of
us.''Humph!' said the Camel; and the Dog went away and told the
Man.Presently the Ox came to him, with the yoke on his neck and
said, 'Camel, O Camel, come and plough like the rest of
us.''Humph!' said the Camel; and the Ox went away and told the
Man.At the end of the day the Man called the Horse and the Dog
and the Ox together, and said, 'Three, O Three, I'm very sorry for
you (with the world so new-and-all); but that Humph-thing in the
Desert can't work, or he would have been here by now, so I am going
to leave him alone, and you must work double-time to make up for
it.'That made the Three very angry (with the world so
new-and-all), and they held a palaver, and anindaba, and apunchayet, and a pow-wow on the edge
of the Desert; and the Camel came chewing on milkweedmost'scruciating idle, and laughed at
them. Then he said 'Humph!' and went away again.Presently there came along the Djinn in charge of All
Deserts, rolling in a cloud of dust (Djinns always travel that way
because it is Magic), and he stopped to palaver and pow-pow with
the Three.'Djinn of All Deserts,' said the Horse, 'is it right for any
one to be idle, with the world so new-and-all?''Certainly not,' said the Djinn.'Well,' said the Horse, 'there's a thing in the middle of
your Howling Desert (and he's a Howler himself) with a long neck
and long legs, and he hasn't done a stroke of work since Monday
morning. He won't trot.''Whew!' said the Djinn, whistling, 'that's my Camel, for all
the gold in Arabia! What does he say about it?''He says "Humph!"' said the Dog; 'and he won't fetch and
carry.''Does he say anything else?''Only "Humph!"; and he won't plough,' said the
Ox.'Very good,' said the Djinn. 'I'll humph him if you will
kindly wait a minute.'The Djinn rolled himself up in his dust-cloak, and took a
bearing across the desert, and found the Camel most 'scruciatingly
idle, looking at his own reflection in a pool of
water.'My long and bubbling friend,' said the Djinn, 'what's this I
hear of your doing no work, with the world so
new-and-all?''Humph!' said the Camel.The Djinn sat down, with his chin in his hand, and began to
think a Great Magic, while the Camel looked at his own reflection
in the pool of water.'You've given the Three extra work ever since Monday morning,
all on account of your 'scruciating idleness,' said the Djinn; and
he went on thinking Magics, with his chin in his hand.'Humph!' said the Camel.'I shouldn't say that again if I were you,' said the Djinn;
you might say it once too often. Bubbles, I want you to
work.'And the Camel said 'Humph!' again; but no sooner had he said
it than he saw his back, that he was so proud of, puffing up and
puffing up into a great big lolloping humph.'Do you see that?' said the Djinn. 'That's your very own
humph that you've brought upon your very own self by not working.
To-day is Thursday, and you've done no work since Monday, when the
work began. Now you are going to work.''How can I,' said the Camel, 'with this humph on my
back?''That's made a-purpose,' said the Djinn, 'all because you
missed those three days. You will be able to work now for three
days without eating, because you can live on your humph; and don't
you ever say I never did anything for you. Come out of the Desert
and go to the Three, and behave. Humph yourself!'And the Camel humphed himself, humph and all, and went away
to join the Three. And from that day to this the Camel always wears
a humph (we call it 'hump' now, not to hurt his feelings); but he
has never yet caught up with the three days that he missed at the
beginning of the world, and he has never yet learned how to
behave.THE Camel's hump is an ugly
lump Which well you may see
at the Zoo; But uglier yet is the hump we
get From having too little
to do. Kiddies and grown-ups
too-oo-oo, If we haven't enough to
do-oo-oo, We get the
hump— Cameelious
hump— The hump that is black and
blue! We climb out of bed with a frouzly
head And a snarly-yarly
voice. We shiver and scowl and we grunt and
we growl At our bath and our
boots and our toys; And there ought to be a corner for
me (And I know there is one for
you) When we get
the hump— Cameelious
hump— The hump that is black and
blue! The cure for this ill is not to sit
still, Or frowst with a book by
the fire; But to take a large hoe and a shovel
also, And dig till you gently
perspire; And then you will find that the sun
and the wind. And the Djinn of the Garden
too, Have lifted
the hump— The horrible
hump— The hump that is black and
blue! I get it as well as
you-oo-oo— If I haven't enough to
do-oo-oo— We all get
hump— Cameelious
hump— Kiddies and grown-ups
too!
HOW THE RHINOCEROS GOT HIS SKIN
ONCE upon a time, on an uninhabited island on the shores of
the Red Sea, there lived a Parsee from whose hat the rays of the
sun were reflected in more-than-oriental splendour. And the Parsee
lived by the Red Sea with nothing but his hat and his knife and a
cooking-stove of the kind that you must particularly never touch.
And one day he took flour and water and currants and plums and
sugar and things, and made himself one cake which was two feet
across and three feet thick. It was indeed a Superior Comestible
(that's magic), and he put it on stove because he was allowed to
cook on the stove, and he baked it and he baked it till it was all
done brown and smelt most sentimental. But just as he was going to
eat it there came down to the beach from the Altogether Uninhabited
Interior one Rhinoceros with a horn on his nose, two piggy eyes,
and few manners. In those days the Rhinoceros's skin fitted him
quite tight. There were no wrinkles in it anywhere. He looked
exactly like a Noah's Ark Rhinoceros, but of course much bigger.
All the same, he had no manners then, and he has no manners now,
and he never will have any manners. He said, 'How!' and the Parsee
left that cake and climbed to the top of a palm tree with nothing
on but his hat, from which the rays of the sun were always
reflected in more-than-oriental splendour. And the Rhinoceros upset
the oil-stove with his nose, and the cake rolled on the sand, and
he spiked that cake on the horn of his nose, and he ate it, and he
went away, waving his tail, to the desolate and Exclusively
Uninhabited Interior which abuts on the islands of Mazanderan,
Socotra, and Promontories of the Larger Equinox. Then the Parsee
came down from his palm-tree and put the stove on its legs and
recited the following Sloka, which, as you have not heard, I will
now proceed to relate:—
Them that takes cakes Which the Parsee-man bakes Makes dreadful mistakes.
And there was a great deal more in that than you would
think.
Because, five weeks later, there was a heat wave in the Red
Sea, and everybody took off all the clothes they had. The Parsee
took off his hat; but the Rhinoceros took off his skin and carried
it over his shoulder as he came down to the beach to bathe. In
those days it buttoned underneath with three buttons and looked
like a waterproof. He said nothing whatever about the Parsee's
cake, because he had eaten it all; and he never had any manners,
then, since, or henceforward. He waddled straight into the water
and blew bubbles through his nose, leaving his skin on the
beach.
Presently the Parsee came by and found the skin, and he
smiled one smile that ran all round his face two times. Then he
danced three times round the skin and rubbed his hands. Then he
went to his camp and filled his hat with cake-crumbs, for the
Parsee never ate anything but cake, and never swept out his camp.
He took that skin, and he shook that skin, and he scrubbed that
skin, and he rubbed that skin just as full of old, dry, stale,
tickly cake-crumbs and some burned currants as ever it could
possibly hold. Then he climbed to the top of his palm-tree and
waited for the Rhinoceros to come out of the water and put it
on.
