Corporate Pitfalls E-Book

Maurizio Riva

• Herausgeber: Youcanprint
• Kategorie: Ratgeber
• Sprache: Englisch
• Veröffentlichungsjahr: 2024

Beschreibung

From the stages of his professional experience, Maurizio Riva offers us a precious vision of someone who has lived them all or almost, on the relationship between career, personal ambition and life balance. Alternating the story of his own experiences with insights into business and managerial issues, he reveals the dynamics and obstacles of a large multinational company and reflects on the importance of personal development thanks also to the contribution of coaching. Facts experienced first-hand, from hiring to role changes, from promotions to crises, up to termination/dismissal. A journey, the one that the reader will take, in the world of international business, where you will discover how to face work challenges and sudden changes with courage and determination, where you will learn important lessons in leadership, emotional skills and strategies for success and on how to reinvent yourself. Corporate Pitfalls is an essential reading for those who want to sharpen their work skills, for companies that want to understand mistakes to correct them, but also a testimony of how to never give in to external conditioning to dedicate yourself to your personal growth. It is a guide that will lead to success, even after falls, teaching us that nothing is precluded to us if we are willing to act authentically, with courage and determination.

Leseprobe

TABLE OF CONTENTS

ACKNOWLEDGMENTS

PREFACE

INTRODUCTION

Chapter 1 NEVER GIVE UP

Chapter 2 BE THE FIRST, NOT THE BEST (THE POWER OF INSTINCT)

Chapter 3 TRAVELING THROUGH ONE'S PASSIONS

Chapter 4 INSTINCT AND “STRATEGIC” INFLECTION POINTS

Chapter 5 MOVING BEFORE WE ARE ASKED

Chapter 6 THE DISCOVERY OF COACHING

Chapter 7 THE HEALTHY COMPANY WITHOUT PITFALLS

Chapter 8 SINGAPORE DIRECTION HAPPINESS

Chapter 9 THE SABBATICAL BREAK

Chapter 10 THE HAMSTER WHEEL

Chapter 11 THE PITFALL OF THE BUSINESS CARD AND THE EXPIRATION DATE

Chapter 12 THE CORPORATE HANDCUFFS

Chapter 13 HOW A COMPANY CAN REMEDY AND ELIMINATE PITFALLS

Chapter 14 HOW TO REDISCOVER YOUR PASSIONS AND CREATE A NEW JOB

Chapter 15 COACHING AS A WAY OF LIFE

Chapter 16 BREAKING THE CORPORATE HANDCUFFS AND CHOOSING TO BE HAPPY

Chapter 17 CONCLUSIONS

BIBLIOGRAPHY

The author

Maurizio Riva

Corporate Pitfalls

Dealing with Corporate Stress and Toxicity to Liberate Your Identity

Title: Corporate Pitfalls

Author: Maurizio Riva

ISBN | 9791222763774

© 2024 - All rights reserved by the Author

This work is published directly by the Author through the self-publishing platform Youcanprint, and the Author holds all rights exclusively. No part of this book may be reproduced without the prior consent of the Author.

Youcanprint

Via Marco Biagi 6 - 73100 Lecce

www.youcanprint.it

[email protected]

To my mother Giuseppina

Who convinced me with her tears to quit my job and enroll in University. I could never have imagined that those tears would lead me to where I am today.

ACKNOWLEDGMENTS

I would like to publicly thank a few people who, often unknowingly, inspired me to share my story. Above all, I want to thank those who supported me during the writing of this book.

To my friends, “The Magnificent 7” INSEAD Buddies Jorge, Arnaud, Raphael, David, Zeki, and Thierry, who encouraged me to write this book. Thank you for pushing me to reflect, grow, and find the courage to tell my story.

To my first Coach Maria Cristina Isolabella and my psychologist Graziella Lucchini, who always knew how to ask effective questions without being intimidated by my personality, helping me to find the right answers.

To the various mentors, extraordinary people in their own way, who have brightened the path ahead of me over the years.

To my parents, Giuseppina and Ettore, who, even in difficult times, always showed me their trust and support. I am grateful for everything they have done for me and for teaching me the value of courage and determination through their words and example.

To Elena, who stood by me and supported me during the most exciting and challenging period of my professional growth.

To my son Alessandro, for his patience in dealing with me as an overbearing father in his life. His kindness and dedication are precious treasures in my existence.

To Milena, my life partner, who, with her strength, independence, depth, and lightness, accelerated my desire for change toward the life I desired.

PREFACE

In the interest of intellectual honesty, I must declare that I am biased. I met Maurizio in 2021 through the INSEAD Mentoring Program, and since then, we have never parted ways. In “Corporate Pitfalls,” Maurizio takes the reader by the hand, guiding them step by step through the main challenges that corporate life can present, both in its ascending phase and in the often painful descending phase.

Starting from his troubled decision to study at the university, driven by the decisive role played by his mother Giuseppina, to whom the book is dedicated, and then moving on to his determined entry into the workforce in the technology sector, which he never left, taking on increasingly greater responsibilities in various companies, Maurizio describes with pragmatism and transparency not only his successes but also the numerous difficulties he has faced to stay on top for all these years.

One aspect of the book particularly struck me: Maurizio does not hide his fears; instead, he invites the reader to recognize and manage them through effective tools born from his experience. It is rare for a successful professional to have the courage to appear as they are. Many readers will see themselves in some of the situations described in the book and may find useful points for reflection. They will discover that they coexist with internal saboteurs, whom they will learn to recognize and manage, even with visualization techniques. Helping to liberate one’s identity in contexts that do not always allow it is the stated and, in my opinion, achieved goal of the book. Leveraging his emotional intelligence and empathy, Maurizio opens the door to his qualities and weaknesses to help us recognize the fear that sometimes holds us back, which we can try to overcome without losing ourselves. The search for a balance between ambition, the drive for improvement, and consistency with our nature and values accompanies us page after page, rich with examples and concrete experiences, not only his own but also those of people he has met on his journey as a coach. He thus invites us to take control of our time, teaching us to delegate and to resist the impulse to control everything, as well as to establish healthy boundaries to contain even personal situations that can be toxic, and to manage stress through activities that allow for greater self-awareness and body awareness.

The book conveys a strong determination accompanied by uncommon soft skills. It teaches us to never give up, to be the fastest, not always the best, and to move before we are asked. Speed, flexibility, and fluidity outweigh the weight of perfection, which often hinders the pursuit of timely answers. Learning to trust one’s instinct is crucial, as is developing emotional intelligence in terms of genuineness and empathy, generating collaborative solutions in conflict situations.

Maurizio recounts his promotions and the related concerns about staying at the top, but also what many of us would consider a failure—being fired—guiding us through the corporate hamster wheel.

With an incredible capacity for adaptation and regeneration, not without suffering, Maurizio has always managed to start over and smile, even in his private life. In the book, he is always generous in reliving these positive and negative experiences, sharing his emotions with the reader without filters. Even those related to unexpected events, whose signals he had ignored, that can upend all plans and plunge us into a state of total despair and bewilderment. He advises us to learn to listen to “Cassandra warnings,” true warnings of potential future problems that we do not always recognize. Doing so requires being ready to listen to what we are not willing to hear, rather than just looking in the mirror—a frequent habit when reaching high positions. To get used to dealing with these unpredictable events, of which corporate life is full, it is necessary to learn to manage complexity and ambiguity, as well as to create allies in the company, with the awareness that possible rejections or defeats should not be tied to the person but to the position held.

The book is ambitious, like its author, and offers useful analytical tools even to human resources professionals interested in building a healthy work environment for their employees. With his coaching experience, Maurizio demonstrates an uncommon ability to understand the development of people in a 360-degree perspective, extending the field of analysis to the corporate climate and the fight against workplace toxicity.

Having read the book in one breath, I enthusiastically recommend it to anyone who wants to fasten their seatbelt, challenge themselves, and watch a movie—the professional and personal life—in real time of a great professional and, I dare say, a great man.

Andrea Minuto Rizzo

INTRODUCTION

Welcome to this book, welcome to my story.

Welcome to this journey we will take together, and I hope it will help you write an important and decisive part of your story.

The idea to write this book did not arise from an autobiographical need but from a deep urge I have felt for some time to reach out to those who work—individual contributors or Managers, who feel overwhelmed by corporate mechanisms, the many Pitfalls scattered along the professional path, and the increasingly toxic strategies of the corporate and multinational world. I want to “speak” to many, overcoming the natural numerical limit of people I have helped over the years and whom I have followed and continue to follow as an Executive Coach.

I know a thing or two. My career developed and grew in the multinational ecosystem, conquering increasingly important roles and collecting enormous satisfactions, but also brushing against dark abysses, trapped in the spiral of a job that silently stifles the healthy development of personal relationships and consequently affects physical and mental well-being.

Every event I recount here is true, just as the insidious and slow deprivation of balance between private life and career I reached, following the illusion that a more than satisfactory economic well-being could correspond to a proportionally satisfactory personal well-being, was true and destabilizing.

The discovery of Coaching, first for my personal growth, then as a study and consolidation of skills to serve others, supported me in a radical and substantial change in my life direction and the course of my career. Coaching, in fact, has the power to open new horizons, to question limiting beliefs, and to reveal the true potential that lies within us. I, who am now an Executive Coach, have managed, thanks to the support of a Coach, to define clear and achievable goals, overcoming the fears and doubts that slowed down my personal process of change and evolution.

After bringing together my many years of Executive experience in multinationals, my personal journey, my knowledge, and Executive Coach certifications, today I know I can be a true guide for those who do not know how to escape their own “hamster wheel” at this moment. For those who can no longer find their identity except in the “business card” of the company they work for or have worked for until yesterday. I am here for those who discover with dismay that they have a nice pair of corporate handcuffs on their wrists and no longer know how to free themselves.

Many are the themes I will touch upon in this journey, just as many are the testimonies of clients I have worked with (real cases with different names, of course), and the various sheets I have created for small insights into some of the thematic concepts discussed.

I want to emphasize that in the book I have used the male gender purely for simplicity’s sake, to make the writing and reading smoother.

Every word you read here was written with the intention of being dedicated to everyone, men as well as the many women who, with their active participation in the corporate and family context, often suffer double the work pressure, especially in managerial roles. But also, and more generally, to those who do not identify with any gender.

If you are reading this, you are part of the journey, this book is written for you.

Every single word is dedicated to you, whoever you are.

This is my personal story of challenge, transformation, and success, but it is also an invitation to those who read it to take care of rediscovering their identity, first and foremost outside of the professional context and role, to believe in possible happiness, to open to the possibility of relying on an expert who can accompany and support the desire for change.

Because changing your life is possible.

Chapter 1NEVER GIVE UP

I grew up in Boscone Cusani, a small village in the lower Po Valley in Italy with one hundred and fifty souls, in the province of Piacenza.

The few children of school age were gathered by the only two teachers, in two classrooms, in the small elementary school. In one room, twelve girls and boys attended a mixed class that ranged from first to second grade. In the other classroom, the third, fourth, and fifth grades.

Now they call them 'multi-grade classes,' or classes born out of exceptional situations, but at the time I thought schools all over the world were like that.

It was there that I discovered I was good at studying. Without effort, I learned and did my homework, even helping older classmates. In second grade, I was already solving math problems assigned to fourth and fifth graders. Then middle school in Calendasco, the nearby town, and high school in Piacenza.

I was already working during the summer, helping my father Ettore and my uncle Ernesto in the fields, or in the mechanical workshop of 'Lavelli Romano,' so choosing the Technical Industrial Institute was the most natural choice for me. Not that I didn't have my big adolescent dreams, from my little room, looking at my future success in the mysterious world outside, but I wanted to contribute to my family's difficult economy right away.

With the Technical Industrial Institute, I would have studied for five years, worked during the summers, and eventually found a job, perhaps a permanent position.

I left for Piacenza on the 7:30 AM bus. My neighbor, Franco, was the bus driver, and we used to call the bus 'Corriera' in those parts.

Sometimes, if he didn't see me, he would honk the horn in front of our house and wait for me to get on, amidst the glaring looks of the other passengers.

It was the late '70s, and instinctively, among the many courses the school offered, I chose Electronics because it already felt like the future.

The transition from middle school in Calendasco to high school was traumatic. From being the top of the class as I had always been, I found myself struggling behind others who had attended schools in the city. The first semester was a disaster on all fronts, especially in English, which was totally incomprehensible to me. But even mathematics, which I loved so much, had become an agonizing puzzle.

In the second semester, I began a slow comeback. I studied incessantly day after day, week after week, going back and forth from Piacenza, finishing my homework even at night. By the end of the year, my grades were good in all subjects.

The comeback soon turned into an overtaking.

In the years to come, I was once again the top of the class, to the undeniable great satisfaction of my parents, but when I reached graduation, I felt my life crumbling.

It had been a very turbulent year in class. We were assigned to an Electronics teacher who was actually a former employee of a company. He had been fired, and the choice to teach was a mere fallback, no vocation, no commitment, no passion. The last thing that man wanted to do was teach. He parked us, abandoned to ourselves, to play with electronic circuits. To complicate matters, that year, a severe pneumonia forced me to stay home, away from school and classmates.

We all found ourselves in great difficulty during the exam, unable to complete the written part of Electronics. Nothing that the exam prompt asked of us had ever even been mentioned.

Moreover, due to distraction, stress, tension, I completely went off-topic in the Italian written exam. The committee drastically lowered my final grade, without taking into account the model student I had always been: 43/60 was the final result.

I came out with broken bones. How would I tell my parents, who had invested so much in me and my studies?

Perhaps for the first time, I looked at myself with different eyes; I saw myself as a mediocre person, who could only achieve mediocre dreams and live a mediocre life. That Maurizio who dreamed of leaving his 'little village,' always too small for him, had to accept defeat, accept a pre-written reality, put the suitcase back on the highest shelf of the wardrobe, and forget about it.

That day marked an end for me, the end of dreams, the end of my studies. Enough. Chapter closed.

I immediately looked for a job and accepted a contract as a toll collector on the motorway Autostrada del Sole, at the Milano Sud Barrier, in Melegnano, where I had already worked as a summer seasonal the previous year.

I signed a one-year part-time contract, where I had to guarantee at least ten days of presence per month, but in fact, I offered myself, whenever I could, as a substitute or as a stopgap during times of heavy traffic. I managed to work even twenty-five days a month, and the salary was very good compared to what a nineteen-year-old boy could typically earn in his first job.

I was earning about two million lire a month, while my father, with his job as a worker, after many years of service, received a paycheck of about one million three hundred thousand lire.

I felt satisfied, I was earning, 'bringing home the bacon,' as they used to say in my hometown, and I no longer had to deal with studying.

But my parents always looked at me with a hint of sadness. Not so much disappointed by my disastrous result in the final exams, but rather distressed by the thought that I was so categorically determined not to continue studying.

And I, too, deep down, was very bitterly disappointed in myself.

It was 1982, Italy had won the World Cup in Spain.

Euphoria was in the air.

I worked a lot. From my station at the Melegnano toll booth, I watched people leaving, people arriving. And Milan, there in the distance, remained a mythical, attractive, and frightening place.

Not that I had never been to a big city. The year before, I had gone to Rome for the training course for “Highway Toll Collector,” more commonly “toll booth operator.” Lost and alone, I was immediately adopted by my future colleagues, all much older than me. I don't think I'll ever forget the smell of rain at Villa Ada, the first real “Carbonara” dishes, and the smell of glutamate at the Hotel Pensione Eletta in Piazza del Gesù.

One evening in late September, at dinner, after a long shift at the toll booth, I found myself at the table alone with my father. My mother, as always, had prepared everything, but she had stayed in her room.

- What happened? Is she sick? Did you have a fight? -

- No son... you see... your mother has been crying every night for a while now. At first, she did it secretly, at night, but now she has confessed to me why. -

- Did something serious happen? -

- No, it's just that she can't accept that you don't want to go to university. –

I felt a knot in my stomach. I felt my head heavy, my heart heavy.

My mother Giuseppina wept at my surrender. I was ashamed of my fears.

She wanted me to continue studying. And what did I really want? Would I have been capable?

I played the last card for the perfect alibi.

And what about the money? Now I have a job, I earn well, and I can finally help you. Who cares about university!

I had played the ace, with little inner conviction, aware of my alibi, but proud of having simulated confidence to appear credible.

My father continued to stare at me with a questioning look and his left eyebrow raised. He could recognize my lies, even just from the tone of my voice.

He remained silent. I along with him.

I spent the night staring at the ceiling and the crossroads in front of me, trying to glimpse the two different future landscapes. But above all, trying to understand what was the real resistance hidden behind the fear of starting university. Certainly, the fear of not being up to it, but also that of not being able to help my parents, indeed of still having to be a burden on them. On one hand, the recent school events had taken away all my self-confidence, on the other, the strong belief in me from my mother and father had rekindled a small flame, that sense of challenge and courage that were typically mine.

It was not easy to decide.

In the following days, while I was still pondering how to do the right thing, the word that I might resume my studies had already spread. The phone calls continued throughout the day, for several days, with unexpected visits at all hours. Neighbors, relatives, grandparents, and uncles all arrived to dissuade both me and my parents from that insane deplorable idea of university.

My uncles asked me if I was crazy to leave a golden job like the one at the toll booth, my paternal grandmother put me in front of the fact that the sacrifices my parents would have to make would be too great and that in this way I would make them suffer again.

Even friends at the bar looked at me with a questioning expression of 'Why are you doing this?'

To everyone, I was someone throwing away a secure, privileged future, going off to play at studying, something that even the graduation committee had strongly advised against.

A few evenings later, still at the table, looking my parents in the eyes, I announced that I would enroll in university, on the condition that I could continue my part-time job at the toll booth.

My mother cried again, this time with happiness.

For a long time, I thought I had done it for her, but in reality, I realized much later, I had made that decision for myself, I felt it was mine, I felt it was the fundamental decision to lay the foundations for what my future life would be.

I chose to attend in Milan, even though it was more expensive compared to Pavia, but that way I would be closer to work and also by train, Piacenza - Milan Lambrate, it was convenient. Nearby, in Piazza Leonardo da Vinci, there was the Politecnico, a historic, prestigious university, with several truly interesting fields of study. I raised the bar of my personal challenge and chose: Electronic Engineering.

On September 28, 1982, I still remember the date, I crossed the threshold of the university Politecnico of Milan for the first time, with all the signed documents and fees paid. They gave me the booklet and directed me to the classroom where the preparatory lessons for the new academic year had already started.

My first day at university.

From then on, it was all smooth sailing. I rediscovered my enthusiasm and my agile study skills. I liked it very much. I was good, again. I was able to pass the exams with ease.

In that first year, my life was very challenging, a continuous alternation and balancing act between study and work, but I was happy.

I learned a lot from that period of my life. For the first time, I concretely understood how every choice we make truly determines our future; even the smallest and seemingly insignificant decision can have a huge impact. Some choices are even 'sliding doors,' a sudden change from what, just a few hours earlier, we might have thought was our destiny.

Often with my clients, we go back to re-examine what their successful choices were, to understand what important attitudes determined them. Certainly, they are varied and different; among the many, I believe some can be considered among the foremost:

- being deeply honest with oneself

- recognizing and knowing how to manage the inner saboteur

- to recognize and manage modes and beliefs, as well as external influences

- being tenacious.

CARD: THE SABOTEURS

Psychological saboteurs are negative or self-limiting thought patterns that can hinder our well-being, success, and the achievement of our objectives. I am a component of the self that tends to turn against certain behaviors of the person themselves, with the intent of safeguarding. The saboteurs are driven by the instinct of survival.

These are patterns that are established in childhood, but if not recognized, we carry them into adulthood. As children, those same patterns that arise as healthy strategies against strong emotions that we are unable to manage, if not recognized, will hinder our growth as adults by reappearing in situations that evoke strong emotions.

The choices and actions that our saboteurs will lead us to take will not respond to maturation or lived experiences, but rather to the patterns adopted in childhood to avoid feeling a deep wound or emotion.

The result, in the long run, will be the failure to achieve our true objectives, leading us to a state of unhappiness if not even self-destruction.

Here are some common types of psychological saboteurs:

The Perfectionist: has the unrealistic expectation of having to do everything impeccably, leading to excessive self-criticism, fear of others' judgment, and avoiding challenges for fear of failure.

- The Inner Critic: is an inner voice that constantly criticizes one's actions, decisions, and performance, undermining self-confidence, fueling a sense of inadequacy, and generating negative thoughts that limit potential.

- The Victim: focuses on obstacles and unfavorable circumstances, attributing the responsibility for one's failures to others or to fate. The result is the absence of personal responsibility, passivity, and lack of initiative towards change.

- The Controller: tends to seek absolute control over situations and people around them, creating stress, frustration, and difficulty in managing relationships, as they take refuge in the illusion of being able to control everything.

- The Self-Sacrificer: always puts the needs of others above their own, often at the expense of their own well-being and happiness. Fatigue, physical and mental exhaustion, and lack of personal satisfaction are often the result.

- The Conformist: is afraid to step out of their comfort zone and go against social expectations, hindering individuality, innovation, and the pursuit of new opportunities.

- The Catastrophist: tends to imagine the worst possible scenario in every situation, thus amplifying fear, anxiety, and pessimism, preventing them from seeing positive possibilities and acting constructively.

These are just a few examples of psychological saboteurs, but you may encounter many others. It is important to recognize these thought patterns and work to transform them into healthier and more effective models, so that we can reach our full potential and emotional well-being.

Being deeply honest with oneself means learning to listen to oneself, and it is the first step to understanding what we truly want for our lives. Cultivating instinct and learning to intercept and decipher the signals it offers through bodily sensations leads us more quickly to our truth.

What seems easier (but believe me, it is not) is managing the so-called “external influences”, those beliefs that have been installed over the years, sometimes due to innocent phrases or the education imparted by parents or teachers, modes internalized just to be accepted by a group, emotional blackmail that we have embraced within ourselves, as they were disguised as loving advice.

That image of ourselves that we have built by mirroring the desires or needs of others, which has hidden our true image from our eyes.

When we have to make a decision, or make a change in life, phrases, words, and beliefs intervene to block our choice, often creating chaos in our emotions, thus activating the inner saboteurs.

It is essential to understand what or who is playing against us, even when we think that this something or someone is acting for our good.

Emotions play a key role in the decisions we have to make, even when we think we are using only our rationality, or relying solely on numbers or data.

The emotion that almost always comes into play is primarily fear:

fear of having to change

fear of not succeeding

fear of making mistakes.

The list can be very long, but among all, it is always and above all the fear of the unknown that blocks us with the most force and stubbornness.

External influences intervene on the deepest part of our emotions. Rationally, we know where we would like to go, which decision is the most natural for us. But every time we are faced with a choice that could change the trajectory of our life, our emotional side works against us. Rationality pushes us towards a better situation than the one we are in at that moment, but the emotional side holds us back because, to implement a change, we would have to step out of our comfort zone. And this creates great fears. Beyond the fear of the unknown, the most difficult fear to face is that connected to the disruption of our certainties: a disruption necessary to bring about true change.

What if instead, we based every decision on joy rather than fear? Or even better, on love? Love for ourselves and for others?

Imagine the joy with which we would face our new life, the love we could give, the enthusiasm of a new job, a new role, the vitality regained in front of a new adventure, the serenity of sincerity in a new relationship?

How much easier would it be to decide? But love, joy, sincerity are not the preferred measurement parameters of this society, which still too often, not by chance, talks to us about well- being linking it to the economic aspect or at most to an aesthetic standard. For this reason, it is important that we decide what we want our new parameters to be.

As for being tenacious, over the years I have often asked myself

Where would I be now if I had listened to the many external influences? If I had not recognized my saboteur?

Where would I be if I had really listened to relatives and friends who tried to dissuade me from continuing my studies at the university? If I had believed the high school exam teachers who, without even knowing me, pronounced prophecies about my future?