How we are controlled by our feelings E-Book

Dietmar Förste

• Herausgeber: tredition
• Kategorie: Wissenschaft und neue Technologien
• Sprache: Englisch
• Veröffentlichungsjahr: 2021

Seitenzahl: 436

Beschreibung

The book provides knowledge about feelings and their effect on the unconscious. This knowledge was acquired during more than 20 years of psychological counseling sessions in our own practice, in which we performed more than 8,000 hypnotisms. It deals with how and why our life is unconsciously controlled by our feelings. It explains the question why we cannot simply do everything the way we intend to do so, the way we want to do so. To what extent does our fate stem from this? Is there really a fate? Feelings in the unconscious decide whether I am chiefly happy or sad in my life, whether I am mainly successful or a loser in life, whether I am primarily content or discontent in life. How are feelings shaped in us as human beings? From what age do we humans have feelings and from when do these feelings take effect? Can feelings be transferred over generations? What role does a child's upbringing play in the emotional world throughout a person's entire life? What would happen if the image of "good" authoritarian parenting were to crumble? Is a child's upbringing perhaps a matter of suggestions and hypnosis unconsciously given to the child? Are well-intentioned pieces of advice also suggestions? What influence do upbringing and well-intentioned advice have on the quality of life in adulthood? To what extent do feelings influence the development of diseases, addictions, compulsions and certain behavior patterns? If feelings in the unconscious mind already determine whether one is mostly joyful or sad in life, is it reasonable to conclude that feelings can also cause depression, burnout and other diseases? From all these questions, the crucial question at some point arises: can I change the feelings in my unconscious so that I can be happy, content, successful and healthy in life? First of all: the answer is "yes"! This book presents an effective potential solution to that end.

Leseprobe

Dietmar Förste and Kathrin Kain

How We

Are

Controlled

By Our Feelings

A one-of-a-kind guide

“Good advice simply isn’t enough”

Werner J. Meinhold

How We

Are

Controlled

By Our Feelings

A one-of-a-kind guide

Wisdoms of our fathers as

transgenerational

mass hypnoses

Relentlessly revealing,

insightful,

de-hypnotizing

More joy of life through de-hypnotization

© 2021 Dietmar Förste/Kathrin Kain

2nd edition cover design

Illustration: Ute Spingler

Editing, proofreading: Eva Lindner

Editor: Dietmar Förste/Kathrin Kain

Publishing and printing: tredition GmbH, Halenreie 40-44, 22359 Hamburg

ISBN Paperback: 978-3-347-15215-1

ISBN Hardcover: 978-3-347-15216-8

ISBN e-book: 978-3-347-15217-5

The work, including its parts, is protected by copyright.

Any use is not permitted without the consent of the publisher and the author.

This applies in particular to the electronic or other reproduction, translation,

distribution and making available to the public.

Bibliographic information of the Deutsche Nationalbibliothek (German National

Library):

The German National Library lists this publication

in the German National Bibliography;

detailed bibliographic data are available on the Internet at http://dnb.dnb.de

All rights of dissemination,

including through film, broadcasting and television, the internet, other media,

photomechanical reproduction, audio cassettes, electronic data carriers,

and reprint in excerpts shall remain with the authors.

“Wars

would be impossible without

hypnosis and suggestions.”

“Mass manipulation is difficult to

recognize for those affected by it

since their entire environment

follows largely the same delusional behavior.

And the underlying

delusional idea

has hence become the norm.”

Werner J. M.

(emphasis added by the authors)

Table of contents

Preface

Our books

Excerpt from Bishop Michael Bruce Curry’s speech

Chapter I

Mass hypnosis

Swarm intelligence

What we need to recognize and understand

“It can’t be because of my childhood, which was actually very beautiful”

“It is always the others who are to blame…”

This book is about understanding

That problem can be fixed

Take heart! Don’t ‘mis’-parent your children!

Don’t condemn your child!

No child must be “made good” through through authoritarian power

Children are dear and social by nature

Do you have the courage to trust the basic idea of life?

If the solution is the problem

Chapter II

We are controlled by our emotions…

Iceberg model of “being”

Emotions that affect our quality of life

Quality and quantity of our feelings

Suffering curves of burdening emotions

Graphical representation of: The body follows the mind

What are feelings?

Our life reinforces what we are

The unconscious does not work logically

Matter follows spirit

Competition or cooperation?

Chapter III

Information - the whole truth

Which information is important?

Description of “Information” by Prof. Thomas Görnitz

“A bag of rice fell over in China”

What’s important to you? When does your phone ring?

What do you resonate with?

How does energy become comprehensible?

Not “freely lived” information reactions

The famous question about the chicken and the egg

Example: The crying

Example: The rage

The sandbox of life

Energy is never lost

The good manners

It’s the last straw that breaks the camel’s back

The “all is well” hypnosis

Chapter IV

The real self-worth

The cry for love

The little and the big war

The real benefits of “good authoritarian parenting”

The unconditionally loved child

Love your neighbor as yourself

There are no killers lurking within us

No child comes into this world evil

How’s my mommy?

Chapter V

When life gives you lemons, make lemonade

Why lemons, which taste sweet, are actually quite sour

Imagine a world without these contradictions!

Say no!

Are you ready to be able to say no?

“I will not be hypnotized.”

Honey, there is really no butter in the fridge

“Suggestion happens”

“I refuse to be hypnotized”

Chapter VI

Wisdom and advice

Man has a free will

“Because we do not know what we do.”

Me, that’s us…

Who is in charge?

Understanding oneself

The fatal ideal case

Chapter VII

Suppression of suffering as a cause for projection and transference

What happens in the projection?

Example for projection

What happens in transference?

Example of transference

The “good parents” hypnosis

Countertransference

Significance of countertransference in therapy and/or counselling

The possible benefit of countertransference

Transference and countertransference in everyday life

The idealization of counsellors/coaches/therapists

“All is well”, but it’s still not good…

The unreflected person remains in the lack of his own love

Chapter VIII

“We humans are all disturbed…”

“This is normal, because almost everyone is like that.”

Only our knowledge can put us on the right track

The mother’s right to self-development

There are solutions

The tragedy of missing mothers

The “good authoritarian parenting” hypnosis

Are you free of transference and projection?

What is the benefit of de-hypnotizing our manipulated minds?

I am different

Why can’t we just be peaceful?

Chapter IX

The sad person in us

Is it possible to protect yourself from negative feelings?

Energies, that arise in us without our conscious will

The collective burnout – more than a depression

I look ahead and think positively

Chapter X

Murder for love

Do we need walls in our heads?

Tolerance, in its most perverted form

The mass hypnosis of the “fair fight”

Stay here, go away!

Mass hypnosis of “valuable competitive intelligence”

Chapter XI

Authoritarian parenting – a means to an end

When self-consciousness is missing

De-hypnotization and unconsciously lived and felt lack of love

What is a child?

We are all hurt children

Every mental illness, every addiction is always only the second worst symptom

300 years of black pedagogy

“It didn’t hurt us either.”

Honor and love the parents…

What does unconscious intensification mean?

What does symptom shifting mean?

Chapter XII

“Just let go!”

“Time heals all wounds”

“Being happy is a choice”

“I just want to be happy forever…”

You’re happy?

“My car, my house, my swimming pool, my boat…”

Chapter XIII

Logical wishful thinking

“Good authoritarian parenting” is no start into a happy life

Authoritarian 'mis'-parenting towards self-alienation

There is no justice in the nature of authoritarian 'mis'- parenting

The beginning of all bullying

The transferring, projecting person

Impulse control

Rubber dinghy or lifeboat

We reap what we sow

The well-behaved up child

The belief that oppression wouldn’t harm a child

The story about the little well-behaved boy

Even the desired child has to consider authoritarian measures as useful

Why does the concept of strict ‘mis’-parenting stick so persistently in our minds?

Chapter XIV

Know yourself, know your counterpart

Suppression of one’s feeling

How does a man become a beast?

What if a victim comes to power?

“You are too good for this world.”

Our first love affair

The world does not need “jaded” people

People are unstable systems

You are life

Chapter XV

Basic understanding of de-hypnotization

Psychological laws that work in the unconscious

What is important for choosing your life coach

Who does de-hypnotization?

Only psychological work in the unconscious can lead to self-knowledge in the unconscious

Fate

Biographies authors, motivation for this book

We authors have a vision

Short biographies of participants, motivation, impressions

List of sources/related literature/videos

Dear readers,

In our books, we shall

refrain from using the polite “you” in personally addressing you.

for the English speaking world,

because only the conscious mind will understand this form of politeness.

The unconscious mind understands best

“me” and/or “you”.

For us, all people are equal:

Men, woman, children,

no matter what age or background.

We writers,

in our conscious feelings and thinking,

do not know any pecking order or authority gap.

It doesn’t matter

which sexuality and which gender role

a person lives.

It doesn’t matter

what ethnical background, no matter what color, no matter

which religious belief, which worldview,

which philosophy of life

a human being follows.

It doesn’t matter

whatever your qualification, whatever your level of education

or which

“official recognized” level of knowledge

a person has.

For us, all people are equal.

For this reason, in this book we refrain from naming the sexes

(he/she and/or his/her) twice

to make it easier for you to grasp the essentials.

We’ve decided on a writing style of

“brain-reading”

which in our experience has proven to be very helpful

for the easy comprehension of the content, and

quick recognition of connections.

Multiple repeating of the key topics

and explanations of importance to us

as well as recurring references in different chapters of the book

on

what’s happening unconsciously

are intended and to

be regarded as particularly significant in terms of content.

We know that

learning

“new knowledge”

lives on repetition.

Repetitions

offers us humans the greatest possibility

to

“acquire new knowledge into our unconscious”.

“One must repeat the true again and again,

because error is also

preached, not only by individuals, oh no, but the masses.

In newspapers and encyclopedias,

at schools and universities.

Everywhere the error is on top.

And it is comfortable and at ease

with the feeling that majority is on his side.”

Johann Wolfgang von Goethe, German poet

In our work and in our books,

one matter is particularly close to our hearts:

We want to dispel the

myth about

“good old parenting”,

(i.e. authoritarian parenting).

“Strict education”

(or authoritarian parenting)

Can, from our point of view,

after all our experience with clients

simply not

be regarded as a meaningful and equitable

parenting model

of the (early) childhood companionship.

Authoritarian parenting inevitably leads to

“the pulling”,

“dressing the child”.

Dressing/truing/bending

is however is one of the cruelest and most useless ways

for a healthy development of the human psyche

and thus becomes one of the most

inhuman prerequisites

for a healthy start in life.

Authoritarian parenting and strict education

is the limitation, the suppression, the prohibition,

the unhealthy self-alienation of the child,

and is therefore referred to in the following as,

“authoritarian ‘ mis’-parenting”.

With all our knowledge about the unconscious injuries of our

clients

having to endure authoritarian ‘mis‘-parenting

for years,

we are left with no other phrase that would fittingly describe

this form

of

painful psychological limitations,

especially the loss of emotions

of our children.

When passing on information

about the “how-to-lead-a-life” programs

to our children

there simply are

no

“reset buttons”.

We are called upon,

from the first second of new life,

to decide very carefully and lovingly on

which information

we plant into our children and children’s

children into the

consciousness

but for the most part unfiltered and directly into the

unconscious.

For our unconscious decisions and for our

unconscious transmissions to our children

we must first bring about change in our own unconscious.

Our books:

How We

Are

Controlled

By Our Feelings

Your one-of-a-kind “advice giver”

More joy of life through de-hypnotization

Pain creates passionate love

Why we just can’t be happy forever,

School of Emotions for Parents

What do parents have to learn to be good, loving teachers for their children.

Originally it was our claim as authors to publish

the experience from our work,

the unconscious view of human history, in a book.

Unfortunately, due to the abundance of information, we were not able to do so.

In a short time, more of our books will be published.

A lot of things will be repeated in these books.

These repetitions are intended.

Don’t be despondent as reader,

if you don’t understand everything in this book,

don’t despair

when it feels absurd to you at first,

when it feels strange, unfamiliar, crazy,

when it feels like a “conspiracy theory”.

Trust that

we humans

are more than our trained minds.

Trust that

Just when unpleasant feelings emotions come up,

“when it feels completely absurd, completely wrong,

or completely out of place” for you,

when you get angry and/or sad,

this information “can exactly be right for you”!

Trust

that you, as a person of true human success, of a true happy life,

deep down inside you know a lot

more than anyone ever thought you would, what you can,

should and/or may know.

Trust

that you, as a human child,

were born with much more humanity, compassion

and wisdom,

than your parents and educators “could have taught”

and actually, are able to teach you.

Your parents were,

when you were conceived, or born,

hypnotized and limited,

in their knowledge, in their compassion,

they were limited in their (co)-humanity

and they are most likely still so today.

In our current world,

being

„a successful man”

is not an indication to be

successfully human

(with empathy and all).

Trust

that we humans don’t need “specialist knowledge”

for peace intentions. Real justice we can all feel

from our human nature.

Trust that

what you experienced and felt in early childhood was and is

probably much more correct

than what you’ve been told, than what

they have “wanted to tell (and sell) you as right”.

Trust

that even underneath your limiting suggestions others,

are new and better wisdoms which you

may allow yourself to access.

Bishop Michael Bruce Curry,

Presiding Bishop and Primate of the Episcopal Church of the US

Excerpt of his royal wedding sermon for Prince Harry and Megan Markle in May 2018

Live broadcasting TV station NBC

“The late Dr. Martin Luther King once said:

‘We must discover the power of love,

the redemptive power of love.

And when we do that

we will make of this old world a new world.

For love is the only way.

Love is not selfish and self-centered.

Love can be sacrificial.

And in so doing, becomes redemptive.

And that way of unselfish, sacrificial, redemptive love,

changes lives.

And it can change this world.

If you don’t believe me,

just stop and think

or imagine.

Think and imagine a world

where love is the way.

Imagine our homes and families

when love is the way.

Imagine neighborhoods and communities

where love is the way.

Imagine governments and nations

where love is the way.

Imagine business and commerce

when love is the way.

Imagine this tired old world

when love is the way,

unselfish, sacrificial and redemptive.

When love is the way,

then no child will go to bed hungry

in this world ever again.

When love is the way,

we will let justice roll down like a mighty stream

and righteousness like an ever-flowing brook.

When love is the way,

poverty will become history.

When love is the way,

the earth will be a sanctuary.

When love is the way,

we will lay our swords and shields down,

down by the riverside to study war no more.

When love is the way,

there’s plenty good room,

plenty good room, for all of God’s children.

Because when love is the way,

we actually treat each other,

well, like we are actually family.

When love is the way,

we know

that God is the source of us all

and we are brothers and sisters,

children of God.

My brothers and sisters,

that’s a new heaven,

a new earth,

a new world,

a new human family!”

Do you feel the power of these words?

Words are information.

How do these words

make you feel

informed?

We writers are convinced that

you don’t have to believe in God

to feel

the power

of this information,

to feel

that this is the best information there is

for our common earth and the

common life on it.

No matter

whether you believe in God, in the divine creation

and/or

nature and life

“in itself”…

Love is the only way

for a healthy development of the human family.

Chapter I

Mass hypnosis

What does the term “mass hypnosis” refer to in our book?

What exactly is mass hypnosis?

It is true that

what the human being colloquially understands

by the term “mass hypnosis”

actually are

“mass suggestions”,

suggestions that are given to a very large group of people,

a whole nation,

many peoples.

It is true that

suggestions are influences by

which people are

manipulated.

These influences can be exerted particularly easy in trance states,

commonly called hypnosis,

given to a person and/or a group of people.

However, suggestions are also received

in the felt waking consciousness.

Hardly anyone knows that.

Suggestions

which man

“in normal waking consciousness”

receives, however,

can have an equally effective influence,

like suggestions given

during a directly generated hypnosis from

the hypnotist to the hypnotisant

(subject, client, human).

Typical groups for suggesting

to a large number of people

that a specific behavior,

a certain point of view,

a certain feeling,

a certain action,

is actually their

“own desire, coming out of themselves,

are the state, politics, science, industry, advertising

sports, church, music, army, etc.

The result is countless

“successful manipulations of the masses”.

People believe they

”act from their minds”, but in fact

they act from their

unconscious manipulations

The state, politics, the army,

the church, religion, advertising, industry, they all

know very well about the hypnotizibility and controllability,

the manipulability of the people and

they use these “psychological pitfalls” of the

so-called “free people”

more consciously and purposefully

than ever!

Mass suggestions become a mass hypnosis, if through

repeated influencing (suggestion)

a mass hypnotic state is reached

that hides, prevents, represses logical conclusions

and newly acquired knowledge.

That is why in this book we stick with the

term “mass hypnosis”.

The meaning, the impact

of a “mass hypnosis”

can thus also be used

in

layman’s terms

and be easily understandable and comprehensible.

It is important to understand:

Mass hypnosis doesn’t make us stupid.

But they usually limit us massively in our perception and

wisdom.

In mass hypnosis, the access to our

“better knowledge” is limited.

Mass hypnosis “protects us” reliably from

our logically thinking,

it provides reliable protection from important feelings:

“It’s always been so …”

“That’s life.”

“Never mind.”

“You don’t understand that (yet).”

“You don’t need to be afraid…”

The human being is not consciously aware of the

unconsciously assumed hypnotical influences, limitations

which in his unconscious mind

are called

“suggestion to the masses” and are

constantly in effect.

In order to become aware of a mass hypnosis or rather

to become aware of ourselves

to escape unconscious causes and effects in order to

escape the limitations

(Life does not necessarily always have to be like

this, we can also do everything differently, better),

we need a

liberation from the hypnotically anchored suggestions,

we need de-hypnotizing.

Professor of Psychology Dr. Rainer Mausfeld, youtube

"Why are the lambs silent?"

Lecture at the Christian Albrecht University Kiel on 22 June 2015

"…We must know that we are in a manipulative context…"

"It's about the art of making [things] invisible…"

"…in total,

from official documents and estimates by human rights organizations, we see

that since the Second World War […]

the United States

are responsible for the deaths of 20 to 30 million people.

These are dimensions of an order of magnitude, where one asks oneself:

How can it actually happen,

to make such monstrous dimensions virtually invisible to the public?"…

"…The facts are known.

Only the facts have been made invisible to the public…"

In another instance, Mausfeld explains:

"…This is done through fragmentation and de-/contextualization…"

Note by the authors:

Fragmentation is the conscious decomposition of connections into partial statements of different meaning in order to

distract from truths.

Examples for de-contextualization are:

“War” becomes a “fight for democracy and freedom” or “humanitarian interventions”.“

Freedom fighters" are fighting “terrorism”.

which “…means they didn't happen. Nothing happened. And even if it happened, it didn't happen. […]

Nobody cares. It just doesn't matter…"

"…These things happen unconsciously, invisible to ourselves…"

Swarm intelligence

The less we humans know about a topic, the more

we believe

“the truth lies somewhere in the middle”.

But this “logical” conclusion is very often wrong.

This conclusion is much more

a mass hypnosis

that we, because of our suggestions,

because of our beliefs

follow unconsciously.

Because even fundamental issues are at stake,

where it is about meaning and significance of life in general,

where it is about the design

of a happy, peaceful life, the “great masses, the middle” is

simply wrong.

It is precisely in the process of bringing about

world peace

that the masses seem to have been

very far from the real truth,

which can actually enable the human family

to live together in peace and harmony.

The truth may be far away from the center (the majority), it can

even be the exact opposite

from the current,

so-called ‘scientific-based thesis’, from the

current scientific model…

from the “current scientifically established truth.”

The knowledge and/or faith of the masses

is not an indication of truth.

The suggestion is:

“The group always appreciates (knows)

more accurately than the individual.”

“Swarm intelligence” as a term suggests that

you can

“trust the masses”,

because in the average mass

the truth would be.

This suggestion can be misleadingly substantiated

by examples, which, however,

if unchecked, are not transferable

to any “knowledge of the masses”.

If we take a closer look at this aspect, the

following becomes clear:

If in a

“swarm of humans”

the people were exposed to similar or even identical conditions

in their imprinting and training, in

their limitations, in being similarly ‘mis‘-parented,

these people

will be very similar

in their opinions and knowledge.

An example:

Farmers at a cattle market are asked to estimate the weight of an ox.

Every farmer present

“knows something about oxen”.

Every one of them grew up on a farm.

Each has heard of this or that

“exact weight” of this or

that ox

and/or

weighed an ox himself.

So farmers have a prior

knowledge, an opinion,

an imprint about the possible weight of an ox.

Even if some

farmers, peasants not interested in oxen

that were really only ever involved with chickens,

appear as the

“outliers” from the masses

and deliver very different estimates

upwards or downwards,

the well-defined mass easily compensates for

these outliers in total.

The masses are right.

You just need to have enough

people of the same origin, with similar characteristics,

with similar limitations,

with a similar ‘mis‘-parenting/education experience

and ask them about topics they are all familiar with.

Then, we can actually trust the swarm intelligence.

In the average estimate of all farmers we can

expect a fairly accurate weight

of this particular ox.

The “runaways”

are balanced out

by the “knowing mass”.

The suggestion is reinforced:

“The masses knows what is right”.

The big disadvantage:

This “wisdom” of the masses,

the principle of swarm intelligence,

becomes suggestively and hypnotically transferred

into other areas of life.

In this process

there is no longer a conscious

questioning of whether the masses

might be wrong…

Those

who believe in the “wisdom of the masses”

do not question it in every single area of life.

They simply believe…

This hypnosis works so well

because

unconsciously,

man,

above all

would like to belong (to the masses)!

Nobody wants to be an outsider, a runaway

that the masses might possibly reject

because he could “falsify”

the result.

This is an unconscious survival program that we find

difficult to evade.

Let’s assume, though,

such a runaway is not an uninterested or

ignorant person,

but he is rather

“an oddball”, a

“lateral thinker”…

and: he is brave!

What happens then?

Our next example should show that the

generally suggested security, namely,

“to always feel confirmed, that is, normal,”

in the crowd…

is really not a safe assumption.

What happens and did happen when a

runaway

clearly distances himself from

“the opinion of the masses”?

What happens and happened to the first

“runaways” who

discovered

“that earth is not a disc”?

At this point we want to hold on to what

we,

so you and us writers,

as part of the great mass of the present,

already know:

The masses were wrong then!

The runaway from the old days,

who knows from his observations and new experiences

that earth was not a disc,

was right in his opinion.

The earth is round.

It is,

contrary to that,

as the masses at the time were forced to assume,

no disk.

Still… back then,

in the collective consciousness and

unconscious

“the earth is a disc”

Was exactly the view of the church, the opinion of the authorities,

the opinion of science,

exactly the opinion

that had to be considered as right, true and “normal”.

You could have repeated the experiment

hundreds of times.

At the time,

“with the help of swarm intelligence”

you would have concluded

over and over again

the false result

that the earth must be flat.

The thought of

falling off a round earth was so ridiculous

and feared at the same time,

that just from the frightened masses

no more detailed questioning of opinion

suitable for the masses

could be expected.

“And yet it moves!”

Also the

“runaway Galileo Galilei”

caused a lot of trouble in his day,

he caused fears among the people (for

example, the fear of losing power), there

was recrimination,

…convictions…

All this,

because through his work and through his experience (the

earth is not the fixed center of the universe)

he came to have a different opinion

than that of the masses, which

he stood firmly by in public.

How do we deal, how do you deal,

how does politics, how does the economy,

how does science

today

deal with runaways…?

What are you afraid of?

Which mass world view must not be shaken in your case?

What runaways/mavericks scare you? Where do you

not want to fall off?

What exactly do the masses know

today?

Who are the current outliers?

Who or what are the current

“conspiracy theorists”?

“The earth is a disk.”

“War, weapons, armies and soldiers make peace.”

Is that really true?

“Today’s science will be tomorrow’s error.”

Jakob Johann

Baron of Uexküll

„Peace is, economically speaking, complete nonsense.“

Dr. Rainer Mausfeld, Professor for Psychology

Youtube, KenFM in conversation with Rainer Mausfeld

“…if the history of humankind

was the clinical status report

of a single human being,

the diagnosis should be:

Chronic, paranoid delusions,

a pathological tendency

to murder,

and other extreme acts of violence and atrocities

against alleged “enemies” -

Projection of the own unconsciousness to the outside.

Criminal madness in

alternation with

a few brief moments of light…”

Eckhart Tolle, Eine neue Erde, (A New Earth) 2005, p.22

What we need to recognize and understand

Mankind must understand

that it can never be the conscious mind that will

end violence and wars in this world.

Every war,

every aggression and

anger, every little war,

and every great war that follows…

begins in every single person himself.

Every war is continued unconsciously for as long as it lasts,

until we all realize and learn to understand

the actual power of our unconscious.

Only

if we “are aware” of the actual influence of our unconscious on our

wishes, on our will

and on our actions…

Only

if we recognize ourselves in our unconscious and are ready to release

pent-up emotions such as anger, hate and rage

and turn them into love,

every single person can carry these new and good feelings

for a happy future into the world.

Only

when the great masses, or best,

every single person in the world is prepared

to resolve his own warlike conflicts in

his own unconscious…

Only

when the great masses, or best,

every single person is open to change, when

every single person is ready

to give to his children,

to our children,

better life models

filled with (more) love, more respect, more equality,

more peace and less rivalry

acting unconsciously,

only then will be

real harmony between people and thus peace in

our families,

- and therefore peace on this earth.

… because change always begins within ourselves.

“…a generation of deeply loving parents

would change the next generation’s brain

and hence change the world…”

Dr. Charles Raison,

Professor of Psychiatry at the

University of Wisconsin-Madison School of Medicine

“It can’t be because of my childhood, which was actually very beautiful…”

After well over 8000 de-hypnotizations,

in which I have spent the last nearly two decades as

a psycho-social health consultant

to accompany my clients, and my

own well over 200 hypnosis sessions,

in which I was able to process my own

life story and the unconscious shortcomings

associated with it,

I can, at first, without comment,

only but accept the above statement from many people

in the first interview when they come to see me.

I know

that this statement just has to be defended

very vigorously by many clients in their

consciousness.

It is, at the beginning of processing life issues,

of no avail,

to make them aware of something else.

After a few insights into their unconscious, clients

usually quickly recognize during the hypnosis

sessions

this deliberate misjudgment.

It (the childhood) is all the reason!

It is only the journey into our own

unconscious that allows us humans

to recognize the early separation of countless sad feelings.

In our unconscious

we recognize our repressed anger,

we meet our self-esteem problems, we get in touch

with our inferiorities from (early) childhood

to the very source of our lives. These are

irrefutable facts

that,

besides the actually many beautiful

and loving childhood experiences,

the unconscious sadness also

exists within us

and from which the unconscious dictates and determines

our everyday lives.

Generally,

dissatisfaction spreading into every area of life,

an ever-increasing amount of rage,

aggression,

increasing (love’s) grief,

inexplicable sadness,

deep depression,

unquenchable feelings of hate…

All these unloved feelings

don’t come from

“out of the blue”.

Grief, anger, rage and hate,

dissatisfaction and senselessness

do not “accidentally” invade our childhood, our youth and

our adult lives.

They do not come and go

“just like that”…

Depressions are not are not originally the result

of

hormonal or metabolic disorders.

Drugs cannot cure grief and resentment.

All the sad feelings experienced in the present are

not exclusively new,

are not

newly created as a result of a current individual experience.

What “hurts” today is a

lot,

usually even a flood of

newer

“but old familiar”

unpleasant experiences in our own lives

and in the lives

of our ancestors.

It’s mostly the old

ones,

the repressed and disconnected feelings,

which, in their totality

powerfully work

from the “unknown waters”,

from the depths of our unconscious.

A bundle of emotions and feelings,

a huge depository,

in which the current

life experience

is inseparably linked to

the old, early childhood information of

previous generations.

Our basic information

that dictates and determines our lives,

our basic melody of our lives,

is what we are already equipped with

from the day they we are born.

In our (early) childhood,

more notes are added to this melody of our lives.

In the present book we, the two writers,

want to share with you

our experience in this respect

from the journeys into the unconscious experience

and feelings of our clients.

The most important concern here is for us:

to dispel

“good” old parenting myth.

Regardless of our beautiful

childhood memories,

regardless of our conscious belief in a happy

childhood…

One of the most important

questions we should all ask

ourselves must be:

Which information

really arrived to and was stored in

my unconscious

during my childhood?

What bad feelings,

what hatred, what anger,

what suffering and pain

do I bear

as a human being,

without consciously knowing it,

at every moment

in my heart, in my mind, in my body and out into the

world?

I say:

“well-intentioned ‘mis’-parenting”

and a happy, peaceful, free life

are not compatible.

The authoritarian ‘mis‘-parenting of a person

in every possible form

and

“a long, mostly

healthy,

really free,

cooperative,

compassionate, and happy life

with the ability to have relationships are

mutually exclusive!

Dietmar Förste, Leipzig, 2 July 2018

“The function of the environment is not

to shape the child,

but to allow him

to manifest itself.”

“All our mistakes we pass

on to our children,

in which they leave indelible traces.”

Dr. Maria Montessori,

Italian teacher and doctor,

1870-1952

“But that even the raising of children

within the family

always and inevitably

occurs under hypnosis,

strangely enough, is only recognized by a handful of

educators, psychologists and psychotherapists,

let alone by parents themselves.

Hypnosis is the natural, continuous state of

consciousness in the early childhood

(the earlier the deeper),

which only with the school age gradually

is replaced by

longer phases

of a primarily waking consciousness.

These connections have already been recognized by Pawlow,

and are easy to check

when observing preschoolers

play or watch TV.

The above-mentioned main feature

of the strongly deepened concentration

while at the same time narrowing the range of

perception is conspicuous.

Even deeper hypnotic influences take place

through the mother-child-relationship level in

infants.”

Werner J. Meinhold

from

„Depth Psychology Based Hypnotherapy – What Everyone Should Know About It”

p.19

“It is always the others who are to blame …”

Without a basic psychological understanding,

a person will find it difficult

to get rid of his guilt projections.

Prerequisite for a peaceful, loving and joyful

coexistence of mankind is

understanding

“what makes people tick”.

That is what this book is about.

It’s about the big

“question of guilt”

and the great, overwhelming,

unknown unconscious within

us.

We all know that it’s there.

But hardly anyone can really imagine the power

this, not conscious, part of us has

for our

own life and

our living together in society.

Hardly anyone

understands logically

that “consciously”

he will always do what he

unconsciously

“can do best”.

Explained differently, this

means that man cannot achieve

the consciously desired and longed for

if, in his unconscious,

he doesn’t know or understand

the feelings associated with his conscious plans

for a happy life.

If he doesn’t know or understand these feelings

(that are however necessary to achieve his life goals)

he hasn’t learned or practiced them and so cannot master them.

If

in our unconscious

predominantly information

“have been shaped about the unjust world”, and

if we, day in, day out,

are influenced by the idea of people clashing

then we also deeply believe that this is

what the world is exactly like.

If

we must constantly be more successful and

“worth more” than everyone else,

if

we have to live in a world

whose everyday life is

dominated by

taking advantage of others and fighting them…

if

we are conditioned

to share beautiful moments

only if we “deserved and fought hard for them”…

Then

in the lives of these conditioned people

“the mass hypnosis of the elbow mentality”

will show and confirm

in all life possible situations,

again and again.

The unconscious

“feeling right in being against each other” and

“got to be the best”

becomes the real opposite of what we

are ALSO consciously suggested

as

“right, fair cooperation”.

The unconscious has no logic

that could help resolving

this nonsense,

this contradiction

between conscious will and desire and

unconscious what

“we do best”.

This book is about understanding

It’s not about our parents’ fault,

not the fault of educators and teachers, not

the fault of politicians,

not the fault of our companions.

It’s not about the others’ guilt.

This book is mainly about self-knowledge.

It is about understanding

why we are the way we are, why

others are

the way they are.

This book is about understanding unconscious

transmissions and projections,

to which we alone

by the nature of being human

… are at the mercy.

It’s about understanding that

over 99.99 per cent

of what a human thinks and does

is dictated and controlled by his

unconscious

(basic) information.

Everything,

what we consciously want and desire, we

must be able to do unconsciously!

There is an old German proverb that goes:

“Kids with a will, will need a good drill…”

Authoritarian parenting

is especially designed to help

to break

the child’s will.

The better the parents succeed in that pursue,

the more well-behaved, the more obedient,

all the more will-less

a child is drilled to be,

the better the child will

“willingly” do

what it is supposed to want.

A human being

who has been systematically trained and drilled

not to want or desire,

out of itself,

is not able to dissolve this deficit,

just like that,

“in adulthood”.

Will-less people

no longer have any options in their unconscious

“to want and to be allowed to want”.

They have in their unconscious

a lifelong “well-functioning boycott system”,

which is contrary to their conscious wishes and desires.

That problem can be fixed:

They exist,

the alternatives to

“good old authoritarian parenting”.

The best alternative is:

unconditionally perceiving and

unconditionally loving

company.

It’s time to

stop

persuading…

our children into

“following our footsteps”

of our own catastrophic life.

Let us begin to

unconditionally be there

for our children,

and accompany them

on their way into

their own,

immaculate, pure, non-rivalry driven,

free and happy

life.

Alternative parental guide: Accompaniment instead of authoritarian ‘mis’-parenting

Elternakademie-der-kompass

(Parent’s academy “The compass”)

Our children have a right to

to being

accompanied

into their own

unlimited, better lives

100 per cent

free from any mental and physical violence.

Our children have a right

to their own experience, to

their own feeling,

to their own happiness.

Be for all these rights of your children

the best and most humane lawyer in the world!

Be you as a mother or father

the most loving companion of your

children they can imagine and wish for.

Meet your children on an “eye to eye” level,

without authority gap.

Treat your children equally.

Renounce all power games.

Protect your children from excessive demands.

Notice the different feelings of your children.

Respect every feeling of your children.

Do not prescribe to your children

any desired, “fake” feelings. (such as: That doesn’t hurt at all.)

Don’t tell them what to feel!

Take heart! Don’t mis-parent your children!

Let your children keep their authenticity.

Pay attention to your children.

Be there,

be authentic,

to accompany human children, perceived in their essence,

into an unconstrained adult life.

Don’t tell your children how

they have to feel,

or “to behave”

when,

at what time and/or in what condition.

Don’t give in to the temptation to take

the “degree of obedience”

of your children as a measure

for your quality as a

“good mother or a good father”.

It’s your life that’s

stressing yourself out.

You need to change your life,

not

your children.

Don’t fall for the rational temptation to

prove your own,

“once demanded-rightness” through

further emotional amputation

on your children

in the next generation.

Don’t give in to the temptation

to find yourself “right and recognized”,

by indulging yourself in

your

“ mis-parenting success” on your children,

and by measuring yourself against it.

Be your children’s compassionate friend,

partner, protector

that you whished for as a child.

Be your children’s compassionate friend and

protector

that you needed so much

in your childhood!

Don’t hurt your children.

Don’t hurt them

like

you got hurt.

Create the best conditions for self-healing in your

children.

Only love really heals.

Become the best person in the world

who has his children

in every situation in life.

Give your children unconditional trust.

Give your children trust especially and even then,

when they’ve have done “something bad”.

Notice your children unconditionally.

Love your children just the

way they are.

Love your children

unconditionally.

If your child is angry, maybe

that's because

you as a parent

have not yet fully understood

the real needs of your child,

and answered with unconditional love.

If your child is angry,

maybe it’s because

your child senses bad feelings,

like

anger, grief, hate,

helplessness, revenge, etc.…

in his mommy and/or his daddy.

Don’t condemn your child!

When you judge your child,

you judge yourself.

When your child hits,

take it in your arms.

You can be sure:

“Good old authoritarian mis-parenting”

whatever that is,

is not a law of nature.

We all carry better solutions in our original information

and so don’t have to resort to

“common mis-parenting models”

that result from intelligent thinking,

“science”,

religion and

manipulation.

We can all break new grounds.

We all can do better.

No child is born into this world

to primarily act out the evil

that may be

transmitted.

No child comes into this world evil

to harm ist parents and its fellow man.

No child comes into this world,

to be “the best kid”,

to be better than all other human children.

But every child that

comes into this world

wants to be one thing above all else:

Every child wants to belong!

Every child in the world wants the same

thing that you want today

every second of your life:

Every human-child

wants to be loved and perceived in his environment.

Unconditionally.

As it is.

Children are sweet and social in their nature.

Every human child in this world wants peace.

No child wants war.

No child must be “made good” through authoritarian power

Every human child who

sees the light of day,

has the most human

of all human qualities:

the intuitive good.

There is no baby with the evil eye.

On the contrary.

In every baby there is love,

the art of seduction deeply ingrained,

the ability that

makes

compassionate people go into raptures

at the sight

of a baby.

The baby

has the

“irresistible talent”

to spark in us

love and care,

peaceful feelings and thoughts.

Why do you think that is?

Could it be

that the human child

doesn’t actually need to be

“made good” through authoritarian power?

Could it be

that every human child comes into this world

with a huge store of love,

clearly visible, audible, smellable, perceptible, and feelable?

Could it be that

from nature, from creation,

from life, in general,

it is wanted and possible

that

we all

are full of love,

when we are born

into this world???

No baby cries for no reason.

No baby cries

to punish and/or annoy his parents.

When a baby cries,

it has real heartache and really needs that it can’t

handle alone.

When your baby cries,

it doesn’t depend on your knowledge,

but needs to rely on

your ability to

feel and live empathy.

Could it be that

every baby that’s

born is more

compassionate

than you,

than you were ever allowed to be or

“still can be”

today?

Could it be that

every child is

more compassionate

than every mis-parented adult?

Could it be

that this very human capacity for mutual

compassion

provides

all of us

with the best chances of survival,

the best conditions

for loving interaction with one another?

The child depends

on the love of her mother

to survive.

Every child is therefore

addicted by nature

to be a loveable person.

The desire

“to be worthy”

to be loved unconditionally (by one’s mother)

remains

in every human being for a lifetime

as main motivator.

This desire is stronger than anything else.

Experienced and learned “pseudo-love”

through obedience, adaptation,

performance, competition and competitive thinking,

will leave us missing the one thing it just

can’t do:

“Pseudo love” is

never

full and satisfactory

compensation

for the lack of “real” love.

The original aspiration of the individual human being

is not

to create enemy images for

themselves and thereby feeling

“better and/or more peaceful”,

and consequently, feel more

worthy of love

than others.

On the contrary: the baby is by nature anxious

to create sympathies in his environment, which

make sure that this person in need for love

will get its daily dose of his life confirmation,

namely

being wanted, respected and

unconditionally loved

in this world.

Only

if these confirmations from outside

and

and the inner feelings of being worthy of love

are missing in the

human’s self-image,

man needs

pseudo-loveliness, he’ll

inevitably become addicted

to

more and more

compensation.

“The adult environment

is not a living environment for the child, but rather

an accumulation of obstacles

between which the child develops defenses,

and is subject to all kinds of suggestion.”

Dr. Maria Montessori

Italian doctor and teacher

1870-1952

Children are dear and social by nature,

they come highly sensitive,

intuitive

and compassionate to this world.

We would like to take this

opportunity to present an experiment

by Kiley Hamlin

with young children.

(Helpers and Hinderers)

which has often been repeated in varying settings and always

showed the following result:

All of us,

every human child in the world

is in its essence, by its nature, designed

to cooperate, to

belong, to help,

to be a supporting part of the community!

Feelings of competition, own advantage,

to have “feelings of happiness” by creating

losers,

is being trained on us.

The six-month-old child prefers helpers.

The six-month-old child

is controlled by its natural empathy.

The six-month-old child prefers people

(in the experiment figures, cuddly toys),

who support others, who are social and helpful,

who are compassionate with other people.

Very young children do not look enthusiastically at

those who “obstruct”, limit and/or overreach others.

Little children even look away when they sense is cold-heartedness

and injustice!

The same experiment with the same children six

months later…

shows in a tragic way,

that the child had already been conditioned, that

it “might be better”

to side with the strongest, the most obstructive.

The one-year-old child

now prefers those,

who hinder others, who take advantage of others.

An Experiment by Kiley Hamlim

Helpers and Hinderers

youtube

To be capable to do that,

the small child, as far as we know,

must have learned,

to feel the own advantage of

(for example, praise and reward for

“being the best, being the strongest” or

“being among the best, being among the strongest”)

if it sacrifices compassion and

social justice

in favor to

the mentality of power and profit.

To be able to do that,

the child must have learned

to give up compassion towards weaker people

in favor of the externally controlled, suggested

“desired good feelings through overreaching”.

Children

who must be winners

in order to feel “right” and thus loved,

have to limit their compassion as much as possible,

they have to give up, fade out and/or suppress their social

competence

as much as possible.

This manipulated child MUST bear

to look at overreaching,

exclusion, obstruction, marginalization, antisocial behavior!

Only the child manipulated to feel cold with others CAN endure

social injustice

as

“everyone’s own fault”.

We are all being groomed for competition in our society.

Under these conditions: can there really be

simultaneously suggested

equal opportunities, equal rights and/or equality among us humans?

How “different” or how “equal” could we be without

a prescribed “better or worse”?

How could we then experience doctors, architects, public prosecutors, craftsmen,

service providers, but also the countless garbage collectors and cleaning ladies?

How valuable could each and every one of us then feel

in his vocation?

Our society needs every profession, every service, we all live from it,

that we have all these different people in all

those different industries.

Every human being IS a useful, noteworthy part of society from birth

with his or her individual abilities.

Why are we currently being programmed differently from

this fact from an early age

as having to “become someone smart with a decent job”?

Why do we learn that “one kind of person” is more worth than another?

Why do we pay for work “better or worse”?

We feel that sooner or later

there will be a drastic upgrade of the pivotal “inferior professions” of their own

accord in order to keep society alive.

It would be better, however, if parents, educators and teachers would initiate this

process harmoniously and lovingly today,

so that the emotional world of those people-children who want to take up “so-called

inferior professions”, regardless of their “academic performance“, can be changed,

to be strengthened in their talent and to feel part of and respected by the

community, so that they can feel “right and valuable”.

“Man’s dependence on man exists, and it forces our instincts

into social sensations.

Social feeling thus means

being aware of belonging to the community of people; to act socially is to act

in the spirit of the community.

Erich Mühsam

Do you have the courage to trust the basic idea of life?

Life, nature, creation, has one

fundamental goal:

Reproduction

and the preservation of its own species.

In order to guarantee this survival of the species,

all “living things” will ensure this,

to choose the best and most effective method

from all the resources available

to guarantee the survival of its own species.

If,

in the case of the human being,

performance and income

were the most effective methods

for reproduction and preservation of the species,

then…

the evolutionarily particularly successful man would very

probably

produce fertile seeds in sufficient quantities …

and

the successful, career-conscious woman can be

particularly successful and often fertilized

when husband and wife work a lot and very hard.

If,

in the case of the human being,

the most effective methods for

reproduction and preservation of the species

were

competition and suppression of the weaker

then…

the woman would get pregnant at that moment

and/or

the man will trigger pregnancy

the moment she/he steps onto the podium,

when she/he pushes

another one off the winner’ s rostrum.

If, in the case of the human being,

the most effective methods for

reproduction and preservation of the species,

were

exercising authority and unconditional obedience

then…

a woman would conceive new life

if she orders a man to impregnate her, and/or

when a man manipulates a woman to let

him rape her.

If an authority gap

was the best prerequisite for the preservation of human kind,

then the means of reproductive choice would be:

authoritarian execution of power, and rape!

If, in the case of the human being,

the most effective method for

reproduction and preservation of the species was

fighting for peace

then…

all the women in the world would get pregnant at the moment,

when their husbands go to war

and destroy other human lives

“for (new) life”.

If, in the case of the human being,

the most effective method for

reproduction and preservation of the species was

power and possession

then…

in the whole course of human history

only a few rich, powerful people can ensure

the survival of the species.

We, the writers claim:

If the accumulation of power and property

was the most effective method for

reproduction and preservation of our species…

human kind would be extinct by now.

In the whole course of human history

it has always been a very small group

…who had the superiority of power and property.

So

leaving the “successful reproductive ability”

solely to the most power-hungry and wealthy, i.e.

a very small group of the population,

would be one of the least effective ways

to ensure preservation of its own species

and

never enough for

the further development of mankind

up

to the present day!

The few reproductive powerful and rich

would have been…

together with the

“barren” powerless and poor,

long since extinct.

Man’s best and most effective method

to guarantee the survival of the species

is

love.

Trust in life, in nature,

in creation,

that for this very reason, in

every human child

a great deal of love

just has to be present.

The love between mother and child is

the most important prerequisite,

to be breastfed, cared for, nursed and protected

as an infant,

to be any remain viable.

It is love that

that guarantees the

helpless child’s survival.

It is love that

bonds mother and child

by mutual agreement

until the child is capable,

to grow up and leave the

dependence on his mother.

Love

is the most important feeling

that blesses the baby with the talent

to call up and reflect deep

loving feelings

in her mother.

This sweet ability

of the small helpless human being is a basic

requirement

so that a mother

has no other chance than

to fall hopelessly in love

with this little creature.

It is love

that unconsciously guarantees the baby

to be cared for by her mother

even in difficult situations.

It is and remains

mother-love,

and the

love between man and woman

that follows

that

will make sure that in

a very special way,

and

in a harmonious, peaceful and loving

agreement

new, happy life,

a new loving person,

is allowed to see the light of a peaceful world.

Not

discipline,

not

obedience,

not

“drill and order”

but

mother love

is the most important prerequisite

for

the preservation of our species.

If we want to fix the world,

we first have to fix the nation.

If we want to fix the nation

we first have to fix the families.

If we want to fix the families,

each of us needs to fix our personal lives, first.

If we want to fix our lives,

we first have to fix our heart.

Confucius