Perverse Narcissists and the Impossible Relationships - Surviving love addictions and rediscovering ourselves E-Book

Enrico Maria Secci

• Herausgeber: Youcanprint
• Kategorie: Geisteswissenschaft
• Sprache: Englisch
• Veröffentlichungsjahr: 2016

Beschreibung

Perverse Narcissists and the Impossible Relationships explores mechanisms and psychological dynamics of the love addiction through the analysis of the myth of Narcissus and the narcissistic personality disorder. With lots of clinical cases and stories, the book defines the phases of love addiction and related therapeutic strategies which aim at interrupting the vicious circles of the relationship with a narcissist and saving ourselves.After its success in Italy, Perverse Narcissists and the Impossible Relationships is available in the English version for a worldwide distribution both in paper and digital format.

Leseprobe

Index

Introduction

A “grey veil” inside the mind

The Narcissus’ paradox in love relationships

From the blog to the book

Perverse narcissists and the impossible relationships

Control and lack of commitment

Objectification and interchangeability

Idealization and egocentrism

Behaviors to avoid

The three mistakes which feed the addiction

Recognizing the narcissism

Freud, Kohut, Kernberg and Lowen: four perspectives on narcissism

The Narcissistic Personality Disorder in the DSM-V

Three types of narcissism: Behary’s contribution

The narcissistic continuum

How to unmask the perverse narcissist

Am I dealing with a pathological narcissist?

Questionnaire

The human monster

The ambivalence trap

The fundamental mistake

The love disease

Revenge or a new attempt of love conquest?

The illusory solution.

Inside the perverse narcissist’s mind

Relational problem-solving features

It’s not about “why” but “how”

“Cause distortion” in love addictions

A double-blind relationship

Issues, traumas and fears

Understanding narcissism through the myth

Narcissus’ family.

Narcissus during his puberty.

The Aminia murder

The myth of Echo and the end of Narcissus

The narcissist’s “recapture” strategies

The narcissistic “recapture” strategies.

The silence strategy

The guilt strategy

The flattery strategy

The symptom strategy

Resisting to win

The female narcissist and manipulator

The female narcissist and manipulator

Coup de théâtre and psychological soap operas

The intentionality enigma

A psychological enigma.

Is it possible to help the narcissist?

The love addiction

Impulsiveness, mood swings and asymmetric relationships

Thoughts, emotions and behaviors

A definition of Love Addiction

Cognitive features

Emotional features

Behavioral features

Clinical features

The six phases of love addiction

The phases of love addiction

Phase 1. First encounter: getting to know each other

Phase 2. Ambivalence

Phase 3. Self-deception

Phase 4. Idealization

Phase 5. Active addiction

Phase 6. Actual symptomatic phase

Love addiction and homosexuality

Brief focal psychotherapy on love addictions

Psychotherapy objectives

Phase 0. First Session

Phase 1. Insight Phase

Phase 2. Latency phase

Phase 3. Implementation or active abstinence

Phase 4. Corrective emotional experience

Phase 5. Awareness Phase

Phase 6. Consolidation

Eight therapeutic strategies to break the love addiction patterns

The silence task

The addiction “diary”

The “desperate letters”

The metaphor

The worst conditions

A Men’s report card

The “love return” prediction

The Hollywood movie

Stories

Little red riding hood in psychotherapy

Little Red Riding Hood in psychotherapy

Three questions on the love disease

Inside the metaphor

Paola Serino’s photographic project

Acknowledgements

Bibliography

About the author

Books, articles, publications

Contacts

ENRICO MARIA SECCI

Perverse Narcissistsand the Impossible Relationships

Surviving love addictions and rediscovering ourselves

Original version Title: “I narcisisti perversi e le unioni impossibili -Sopravvivere alla dipendenza affettiva e ritrovare se stessi”

ISBN | 9788892622234

© 2014 by Enrico Maria Secci

English version by Mariano Casti

Cover picture: “Wolves” (2013), from Paola Serino’s

photographic project, www.paolaserino.com

© 2016 by Enrico Maria Secci

www.enricomariasecci.blog.tiscali.it

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All rights reserved. According to the Law, any type of reproduction, even partial, is forbidden without the author’s written authorization.

The stories told in this book describe clinical cases taken from the Author’s professional experience.

To protect the patients’ privacy, any personal data which make them recognizable have been omitted.

Each of these stories is reported respecting the privacy of all the people who shared them on my blog, Blog Therapy, at the website address www.enricomariasecci.blog.tiscali.it.

The aphorisms which introduce some of the chapters, if not otherwise specified, have been written by the author.

Introduction

Dealing with pathological narcissism and love addictions was not a choice of mine. If I could have chosen, as a human being, I would have preferred not to venture into the abyss of love pains and narcissistic manipulations. But, since the beginning of my career as a psychotherapist, I’ve started to realize that a lot of patients who came to my office for depressions, anxiety, panic attacks and phobias or other disorders, expressed – through their clinical symptoms – some love issues due to their relationship with a narcissistic partner.