Dear Anxiety, Let's Break Up E-Book

Amanda Porter

• Herausgeber: BroadStreet Publishing Group, LLC
• Kategorie: Religion und Spiritualität
• Sprache: Englisch
• Veröffentlichungsjahr: 2021

Seitenzahl: 179

Beschreibung

Break up with anxiety—for good.   Between the shortage of mental health providers and the rising cost of health care, countless individuals are left with no choice but to function with mental health issues on their own. Dear Anxiety, Let's Break Up offers forty devotions written from both a medical and biblical perspective to help readers - understand the Bible's message on mental health, - develop actionable, scientific-based coping skills, - reverse the cycle of negative thinking, - free themselves from shame, guilt, and harmful stigmas, and - learn to support loved ones who also struggle with anxiety.   Choose faith over fear and move from a life marked by anxiety to one of peace and abundance.

Leseprobe

BroadStreet Publishing® Group, LLC

Savage, Minnesota, USA

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Dear Anxiety, Let’s Break Up: 40 Devotions to Conquer Worry and Fear

Copyright © 2021 Amanda Porter

978-1-4245-6254-1 (hardcover)

978-1-4245-6255-8 (e-book)

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced in any form, except for brief quotations in printed reviews, without permission in writing from the publisher.

Scripture quotations marked TPT are from The Passion Translation®. Copyright © 2017, 2018, 2020 by Passion & Fire Ministries, Inc. Used by permission. All rights reserved. ThePassionTranslation.com. All rights reserved. Scripture quotations marked NIV are taken from The Holy Bible, New International Version® NIV®. Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc.™ Used by permission. All rights reserved worldwide. Scripture quotations marked ESV are taken from The Holy Bible, English Standard Version®), copyright © 2001 by Crossway, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers. Used by permission. All rights reserved. Scripture quotations marked NASB are taken from the New American Standard Bible®, Copyright © 1960, 1971, 1972, 1977, 1995, 2020 by The Lockman Foundation. Used by permission. Lockman.org. Scripture quotations marked MSG are taken from THE MESSAGE, copyright © 1993, 2002, 2018 by Eugene H. Peterson. Used by permission of NavPress. All rights reserved. Represented by Tyndale House Publishers, a Division of Tyndale House Ministries. Scripture marked KJV is taken from the King James Version of the Bible, public domain. Scripture quotations marked NLV are taken from the New Life Version, copyright © 1969 and 2003. Used by permission of Barbour Publishing, Inc., Ulrichsville, Ohio 44683. All rights reserved. Scripture quotations marked AMP are taken from the Amplified® Bible (AMP). Copyright © 2015 by The Lockman Foundation Used by permission. www.Lockman.org.

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Dedication

I’m still trying to find the line between professionalexpert (of which I am) and authentic human beingwho struggles (of which I also am).To all my patients who allow me to be both.

Contents

Introduction

Day 1 Managing Emotions

Day 2 Communication System

Day 3 Unchanging Love

Day 4 Control

Day 5 The Human Stress Response

Day 6 Self-Talk

Day 7 Gratitude

Day 8 Blessed and Stressed

Day 9 Input

Day 10 Patience

Check-In #1

Day 11 Identity

Day 12 Smart Decision-Making

Day 13 Words of Encouragement

Day 14 Hope

Day 15 Patterns

Day 16 Personal Needs

Day 17 God’s Plans

Day 18 Persistence

Day 19 Mindfulness

Day 20 The Purpose of Pain

Check-In #2

Day 21 More Gratitude

Day 22 Power in Proximity

Day 23 Pray and Thank

Day 24 Reframing

Day 25 Perseverance

Day 26 All Things New

Day 27 Return to Prayer

Day 28 No Casualties

Day 29 Seek God

Day 30 Healed, Not Cured

Check-In #3

Day 31 Confirmation Bias

Day 32 Avoidance

Day 33 Radical Acceptance

Day 34 Becoming Christlike

Day 35 History

Day 36 All of the Information

Day 37 Celebrating Hope

Day 38 Building a Balanced Life

Day 39 Medication

Day 40 Become a Source of Support

Check-In #4

Conclusion

Notes

Acknowledgments

About the Author

Gentle Disclaimer

While I am a mental health professional, I recognize that I am not your provider and do not know the details of your personal experience with anxiety. I hope you find comfort in the words I’ve written within these pages, and I recommend that you discuss the teachings with your personal medical provider, who knows you best. The stories and names of patients in this book have been altered to protect their identities. These stories are intended to serve as reflections and applications to help those who struggle with anxiety. You are not alone. We are in this together.

Introduction

I don’t know about you, but I’ve seen countless hardcover gift books and devotionals embossed and flowered with swirling cursive, posing on the shelves of Christian bookstores (before most of them closed their doors). These books contain lovely language that seems convincing in the form of promise and posture. They tout the vast promises of God in tones that tell me I am deserving and entitled to every good thing that comes to me, as if everything is rainbows and butterflies simply because I’ve turned my life over in service to my Savior.

We’ve been misled, whether by our own unreasonable expectations and assumptions or by external influences, including these devotionals and gift books that guarantee peace from worry and anxiety solely because God loves us and wants what’s best for us. While it is important to remember the riches that we will inherit as a result of our love and faithfulness in Christ, it’s also important that we read the Bible and understand its context. This is particularly important when we examine the Scriptures for instruction on how to deal with our anxieties.

This devotional may be different from others you’ve read. I want to offer not only encouragement but also education. I’m not interested in a shallow glossing-over of what Scripture has to say about dealing with emotions. While I do want to offer comfort and direction, my job here is not to give you a warm and fuzzy feeling. Our relationship with God is not a transactional one, and I don’t want you fooled into believing that a life lived in service to God is supposed to be a life without stumble, flounder, and waver.

Anxiety is a tricky business. As a scientist and clinician, I understand what anxiety is, does, and communicates. I can easily rattle off what a successful treatment plan should entail for someone who is struggling with anxiety. As a human being, I admit that my own anxieties (both generalized and social) dupe me. A better way to face our worries exists, friend, and it’s rooted in our faith. Our faith can overcome our fear. It is possible to pivot from living a life of fear to living a life of faith.

Perhaps you wonder if anxiety is a sin or if it’s okay to take medication to help with it. Maybe you’re experiencing shame, guilt, or accusations that your faith in Christ should be enough to heal you. Maybe you’re looking for actionable skills to help combat your anxiety with faith, or perhaps you want to learn more about it so that you can support a loved one who struggles with it. If any of those lines resonated with you, then please know that I wrote this book for you.

What do I mean when I use the word anxiety? Anxiety is feeling worried, nervous, or fearful. Anxious people feel a sense of dread or worry about a future outcome, and they may feel as if they have no control. More than that, anxiety is also a physical experience. Symptoms include headaches, muscle tension, shaky hands, and an upset stomach. Our heart rate increases, and our chest tightens. We may feel nauseated or weak, and it becomes difficult to breathe. We sweat and shake. And worse yet, other people may notice our physical responses, leading to feelings of shame and embarrassment.

Spiritual symptoms and implications are also commonly experienced with anxiety: a loss of meaning in life, a lack of hope for the future, or an inability to focus on God or meditate. I once had a patient describe their anxiety to me this way: “It’s like having three hundred different web browser tabs open at once, all with information demanding my immediate attention, and I can’t figure out which one to look at first.” It’s uncomfortable to say the very least.

At some point or another, we all feel anxiety. A life free of anxiety is simply not a thing that exists. But it’s the presence of excessive, over-the-top, all-consuming anxiety or worry that warrants its classification as a disorder. Here’s the textbook definition of Generalized Anxiety Disorder (GAD), which is the most common anxiety disorder that affects about forty million Americans (myself included), and one in ten people in the United Kingdom:

• One aspect is the presence of excessive anxiety or worry that is difficult to control for at least the past six months.

• At least three somatic (or physical) symptoms must also be present: among them restlessness or feeling keyed up, palpitations or increased heart rate, hyperventilation or difficulty catching your breath, being easily fatigued, difficulty concentrating, irritability, muscle tension, nausea or diarrhea, or sleep disturbance.1

I also classify anxiety as an emotion (not a sin, which we’ll discuss later). We have emotions. It’s the way our wiring works as humans, and these emotions are meant to be explored, not stuffed down or ignored. It’s important to recognize and label our emotions so that we can master them instead of falling prey to emotion-driven behaviors we might later regret. Emotions communicate something, and sometimes they hear the message incorrectly. That’s why our emotions get a seat at the metaphorical table, but they don’t get to sit at the head of it.

Let’s expand our scope and discuss mental health as a whole. Mental health is not merely the absence of disorders or diseases, and the World Health Organization defines it as “a state of well-being in which every individual realizes his or her own potential, can cope with the normal stresses of life, can work productively and fruitfully, and is able to make a contribution to her or his community.”2 Notice that mental health or wellness goes beyond the absence of illness. To be mentally well requires more than simply getting by. To be mentally well means that we are thriving and realizing our full potential. To be mentally well also means that we are productively contributing to our community, rippling out the blessings of our lives, and serving others. Our life goal as Jesus followers significantly overlaps with this definition of mental wellness.

The frustrating reality is that there is no gold standard or objective assessment when it comes to mental health diagnoses. It’s a matter of interview and observation, meaning you sit and talk with a clinician who gets to know you and then diagnoses you. This means that a diagnosis has the potential to differ depending on the provider with whom you are working. I suspect that this lack of objectivity is where the unfortunate stigma surrounding mental health issues is born. The general public might conclude that without an objective assessment that delivers a clear, black-or-white diagnosis, all mental health diagnoses are unreliable, illegitimate, or less credible. This deeply saddens me.

Our biological stress response is natural and innate, and although it was God’s design, it doesn’t mean that it can’t be overwhelming or all-consuming at times. Naturally, we seek relief. And as Jesus followers, we turn to Scripture for guidance. I personally have scoured the Bible for answers, direction, comfort, and encouragement. But I first went about it the wrong way. I found verses that told me I was beloved, adored, cherished, and protected by God. I expected immediate, long-lasting relief from my distress. I expected healing that didn’t necessarily require effort from me apart from quick prayers to God. I expected neat, tidy circumstances with predictable, orderly outcomes. I didn’t expect heartbreak, distress, and hassle. I didn’t expect disappointment. I felt a huge disconnect between what I read in Scripture and what I was experiencing. I didn’t feel protected from my anxieties; I felt alone and weighed down. I also felt bait-and-switched. To use a churchy word, I felt forsaken.

I want to save you some of the struggle I experienced, friend. I write these words for you, but I write them for myself too. While I have found a way to manage my day-to-day anxiety, I still feel a tug of war between calm and fear every day. I want you to understand that as you comb through Scripture on your own journey to peace, you, too, may feel disenchanted. That is, until you arrive at this glorious conclusion: On the front end of any struggle, the desired outcome is the absence of anxiety. But on the back end of victory, wisdom and nearness to God are most satisfying.

In this devotional, we will encounter verses, many from Psalms and Proverbs, that address how to cope with anxiety and combat fear with faith. However, parts of Scripture and many Proverbs are general rules, not promises or guarantees. Remember, friend, nowhere in Scripture are we promised comfort. In fact, the Bible promises the opposite: trial, discomfort, distress, and hardship. As 1 Peter 4:12 reads: “Dear friends, your faith is going to be tested as if it were going through fire. Do not be surprised at this” (NLV). As we read through Scripture in search of relief for our most anxious thoughts, we must analyze for ourselves whether each passage is descriptive or prescriptive and ask ourselves, Is this a place where Scripture is informational or instructional? How does this particular passage apply to me in my personal recovery from anxiety?

Everyone who reads this book will be at a different stage in their faith and in their battle with anxiety. Maybe you’ve been a Christian all your life, in which case I hope you are able to read the passages we cover with fresh eyes. Perhaps you are beginning your faith wanderings, and you want to understand what assurances lie in a man called Jesus. Maybe you are drowning in information but desperately searching for real direction.

I’ll take you through the coping skills and reframing techniques rooted in Scripture that have been most helpful to me in my battle with anxiety. Within each day’s entry you can expect to read a main verse, a brief anecdote or educational lesson, a takeaway message, a journaling prompt, and a closing prayer. At the end of each tenday stretch, we will have a quarterly check-in. I understand that most of us lead busy lives, so it’s difficult to find free time. I intentionally created this book so that it can be read in bite-sized pieces. Come and go as you need. You are always welcome.

To make the most of your encounter with this devotional, I recommend that you find a quiet, calm, and peaceful environment with minimal distractions in which to read. Cut out as much background noise as possible. Tranquil surroundings are impactful. Outer order brings forth inner calm. Perhaps even have a hot, yummy beverage close by.

Lastly, it’s important to acknowledge and understand that we all cope differently, so everyone will likely walk away from this devotional with something different. Whether it’s a complete lightbulb moment or simply reinforcement of a familiar concept, I consider any helpful takeaway a success.

Anxiety still whispers in my ear every day; she doesn’t want me to forget her lies. However, I have found a great deal of comfort in God’s Word when it comes to how I should approach my anxious way of thinking. Once you’ve finished working through this devotional, my hope is that you’ll be able to say the same thing; that you, too, have been able to exchange overwhelming fear for soulful, lasting peace.

Cheering you on in recovery, wellness, and hope,

Amanda

DAY 1

Managing Emotions

He alone is my safe place. His wraparound presence always protects me as my champion defender. There’s no risk of failure with God! So why would I let worry paralyze me, even when troubles multiply around me?

PSALM 62:6 TPT

How many emotions do you experience on a daily basis? Personally, I experience the full range. We all do. As humans, we are wired to experience emotions such as irritability, happiness, sadness, joy, weariness, anger, and anxiety. Some of these emotions are more comfortable than others, and some are easier to control. Which emotions do you struggle to manage the most? Do any of these emotions seem to rule your life? You can’t see me raising my hand right now, but I struggle most with feelings of anxiety.

Anxiety can be a difficult experience to describe. I would define it as fear, worry, dread, or unease. Above all else, anxiety is an emotion. What’s the definition of emotion? I’ve come across a few, and I like this one from the American Heritage Science Dictionary best: “A psychological state that arises spontaneously rather than through conscious effort and is sometimes accompanied by physiological changes; a feeling.” After reading this definition, while wearing my scientist hat, this is what I know about emotions:

• Since each human being is unique, emotions are subjective.

• Since human beings are wired with an autonomic nervous system, emotions are spontaneous.

• Since we have nerves all over our body, emotions are physical.

• Since emotions do not come from time spent in conscious reasoning, emotions are not always rational.

I would invite you to read through this list again but substitute the word anxiety for emotions. Anxiety is subjective and spontaneous. Anxiety can be physical. Anxiety is not always rational. All of this means that anxiety is neither your fault nor a sin; it’s an emotion. And since you are a human being, you are wired to experience emotions—including anxiety. However, it is your responsibility to learn how to manage your anxiety. In fact, one of the most vital skills a human being can learn is to manage his or her emotions. Learning to manage emotions does not come easily. It takes a lot of hard work, and like most things in life, comfort and change cannot coexist.

This is what I am learning: God loves me so much that he created me to be an intricate, individual, astoundingly complex person—emotions and all. He didn’t make a mistake when he gave me these pounding emotions that often lead to racing thoughts and spiraling. I am sometimes overwhelmed by my anxiety, but that does not mean that I’m unfixable. God knew I would find a way to conquer my anxiety and then equipped me to share it with you so that you, too, can find success in your journey. And you will.

Emotions are communicators. In time and with practice, my emotions will hold no power over me.

Journaling Prompt

What is one example of when I managed my emotions well? What is one example of when my emotions overwhelmed me? What triggered my emotions in that situation, and how could I have changed my response?

Prayer Time

Dear God, thank you for the way we are remarkably made, including our emotions. Help me understand how my emotions can serve as communication tools not only to myself but also to those around me. Give me strength to manage my emotions. Amen.

DAY 2

Communication System

He rescues you from hidden traps,shields you from deadly hazards.His huge outstretched arms protect you—under them you’re perfectly safe;his arms fend off all harm.

PSALM 91:1–4 MSG

I truly look forward to seeing many of my patients in the office. When I see Ben’s name on my schedule for the day, I smile. Ben grapples with depression and anxiety as a result of his heart disease, which will require a transplant at some point, or the disease will take his life. He’s lived with his sister and mother for some time now because his depression, anxiety, and heart disease have kept him from holding down a job and earning his own paycheck. It’s a chaotic household because his sister and mother also struggle with their own mental health issues. Thankfully, Ben is a Jesus follower and, like many of my clients who are Jesus followers, once asked me this question: Is it a sin to be anxious?

Since I am not only an expert on the biological basis of anxiety and the stress response but also a Jesus follower, my answer to this common question is nuanced. The bottom line is no, I do not believe that anxiety is a sin; it is an emotion or feeling. Is joy a sin? Is grief a sin? Is surprise a sin? You’ve probably never even questioned whether these emotions are sinful because emotions and feelings are not inherently bad. Emotions are part of God’s design for us, and they’re tools that help us communicate to ourselves and others how we feel about an idea, an event, or a person. Then based on those feelings, an action or response is provoked. Emotions, like anxiety, are meant to prompt us to act. Anxiety is, therefore, a communicator.

The problem with anxiety as a communicator is that anxiety sometimes hears, receives, or interprets the message incorrectly. And if we act impulsively on our emotions or leave them unchecked, they have the potential to lead us to make sinful decisions. Therein lies the nuance of my initial answer. While it is difficult to learn how to navigate the space between feeling an emotion and acting on an emotion, it’s our job as humans to closely examine our feelings and fact-check them for truth. As Jesus followers, it’s our job to go one step further and cross-reference our emotions with God’s truth.

Anxiety may warn us that we are in danger, but God assures us that we are safe. Anxiety may claim that we are unloved, but God promises that we are his treasure. Anxiety may paint our future bleak and hopeless, but God says, “I am your hope.” He will dis-mantle every lie in his quest for our soul.

Anxiety, like all emotions, is a communicator that is, at times, unreliable. It’s up to us to fact-check our anxiety.

Journaling Prompt