Praying for Healing while Planning a Funeral E-Book

Rosey Brausen

• Herausgeber: BroadStreet Publishing Group, LLC
• Kategorie: Religion und Spiritualität
• Sprache: Englisch
• Veröffentlichungsjahr: 2015

Beschreibung

Gary Brausen was a hockey player, runner, and bicyclist. He maintained a healthy diet and did not smoke. But six months after his fiftieth birthday, the doctors told him he had an aggressive form of lung cancer. The prognosis was bleak. Three oncologists said his case was terminal and told Gary to get his affairs in order.   God's will is to heal disease, yet too many people go home to heaven through the pathway of illness. How can we love Jesus so recklessly in the process that we leave nothing on the table when asking for healing except His sovereignty? Praying for Healing while Planning a Funeral confronts our often double-minded approach to lean on the counsel of man instead of the promises of God—losing sight of His miraculous nature as our faithful, loving, merciful God. Learn how you can:   • Fight tenaciously because your hope comes from the Lord. • Seek the heart of God so you don't bow to terminal illness. • Not be afraid to pursue the miraculous. • Trust God to sustain you whether healing occurs in this life or the next.   Praying for Healing while Planning a Funeral is not just about hope; it is about digging in and standing strong as God teaches you how to fight His way.

Leseprobe

BroadStreet Publishing Group, LLC

Racine, Wisconsin, USA

www.broadstreetpublishing.com

Praying for Healing while Planning a Funeral

A MIRACULOUS STORY OF HOPE

© 2015 Rosey Brausen

ISBN: 978-1-4245-5000-5 (hardcover)

ISBN: 978-1-4245-5062-3 (e-book)

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced in any form, except for brief quotations in printed reviews, without permission in writing from the publisher.

The information provided in this book is designed to provide helpful and encouraging information on the subjects discussed. This book is not meant to be used, nor should it be used, to diagnose or treat any medical condition. For diagnosis or treatment of any medical problem, consult your physician. The publisher and author are not responsible for any needs that may require medical supervision and are not liable for any damages or negative consequences from any treatment, action, application or preparation, to any person reading or following the information in this book. References are provided for informational purposes only and do not constitute endorsement of any websites or other sources. The names of some people mentioned this book may have been changed to protect their privacy.

Unless otherwise indicated, Scripture quotations are taken from the NEW AMERICAN STANDARD BIBLE®, Copyright © 1960, 1962, 1963, 1968, 1971, 1972, 1973, 1975, 1977, 1995 by The Lockman Foundation. Used by permission. Scripture quotations marked NLT are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright 1996, 2004. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved. Scripture quotations marked NIV are taken from the Holy Bible, New International Version®, NIV®. Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc.® Used by permission. All rights reserved worldwide. Scripture quotations marked ERV are taken from the Easy-to-Read Version © 2001 by Bible League International. Used by permission. All rights reserved.

Cover design by Chris Garborg at www.garborgdesign.com

Typesetting and interior design by Katherine Lloyd at www.TheDESKonline.com

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Printed in China

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Contents

Introduction

Chapter 1      It’s Just a Virus

Chapter 2      Faith through Forgiveness

Chapter 3      Three Weeks Feels Like a Lifetime

Chapter 4      Our CaringBridge

Chapter 5      The Fight Begins

Chapter 6      No Time to Think, No Time to Pray

Chapter 7      Chemo and Miracles

Chapter 8      Radiation and the Enemy

Chapter 9      Why Isn’t Everyone Healed?

Chapter 10    Recovery

Chapter 11    Healing Is Complete, but God Isn’t Done

Chapter 12    Give God Your Heart

Appendix I    Our Steps to Healing

Appendix II   Healing Scriptures

Appendix III  Prayer List for Repentance

Acknowledgements

God’s will is to heal disease, but we live on a fallen planet and we may go home through the pathway of illness. The trick is to love Him so recklessly in the process that you leave nothing on the table when asking for healing except His sovereignty.

Introduction

Praying for healing is a tricky business. It’s a kaleidoscope of hope, doubt, belief, faith, trust, and fear all wrapped up together. Throw in some feelings of unworthiness, confusion about God’s sovereignty, too much Internet information, plus all that comes with not feeling well, and you have a perfect storm, a true spiritual battleground. It just so happens to be the place where my husband, Gary, and I found ourselves on March 15, 2011.

Have you seen the movie The Avengers? The earth’s superheroes have to team together to take on a fierce villain who wants to control humanity. It’s not easy to save the earth. The heroes really have to duke it out in order to win. My favorite scene is at the end when all the Avengers are sitting in a destroyed diner; their clothes are dusty and torn. They are covered in scrapes and bruises. Frankly, they are exhausted and all they want is a sandwich and a cold drink. This is how Gary and I felt as we journeyed through cancer. We joined God in a fierce battle for Gary’s life because we believed that God is the author of our first day and our last—not cancer. However, we don’t have superpowers. We are ordinary people, who live ordinary lives, and have ordinary jobs. But it is what happened to us through the journey of cancer that makes our story so extraordinary.

As you read our story, it is important to remember that in the Bible Jesus didn’t heal the same way twice; some of the healings were immediate, while others were a process. Each biblical healing has specific attributes especially designed for the person He healed, as well as to teach the world how He longs for a relationship with us. As Gary and I went through our journey together, God was faithful to bring these stories to our minds, encouraging us along the way. They taught us the way we should go, and how we should respond to Him in our situation. He lavished us with patience, mercy, and love as He opened up His healing miracles to us. We used these stories as our pathway out of cancer. Like the healings in the Bible, He may speak to you or your loved one in a completely different way, so it is important to leave room for the creative God to dazzle and surprise you.

Another part of our story, which is a little harder to understand, is that we believe that because God is so relational, because He loves us so much, and because when Jesus died He sent the Holy Spirit to dwell within us, He communicates with us all day long. We believe that He speaks to us through Scripture; or He speaks to us from a note from a friend, or during our dreams at night…really, in a thousand different ways. You may be thinking, “Sure, this is plausible,” but by the end of our story my prayer is that you know this to be the truth and your desire to get to know our loving God in new ways is undeniable. He loves you tremendously, endlessly, fully, and completely, and He longs for you to discover His amazing love.

We get it. God seems so far out there, so intangible, so busy. “Does He really want to talk to me when He has so many things on His plate? After all, there are starving people in Africa, genocide wiping out thousands of people in other countries, collapsing governments, and billions of prayers for Him to tend to every day. How can He possibly be so tender, loving, and omniscient to be aware of all that and still communicate with me individually?” These were actually many of Gary’s own questions for most of our twenty years of marriage, so don’t feel bad if you are unsure about the validity of communicating with God. He knows you. He knows where your limits are, and He will reveal Himself to you as you are ready.

One request we have is for you to keep an honest log of your emotions as you read this story, which can be done in a separate notebook, or you can write in the margins of this book. Make note of the aspects of our story that make you angry, defensive, sad, frustrated, hopeful, peaceful, or joyful. We ask this because in these emotions are hidden self-secrets, the beauty of your heart, wounds, and the sins you struggle with that all need to be worked out with God. He is tender toward your journey. He understands your disappointments, loneliness, heartache, and trust level. His heart is to heal you emotionally, spiritually, and physically. He wants to set you free, not because you have enough faith, and not even because you are worthy enough. But He wants to heal you because it’s His nature to do so and He is God. Go figure.

The kicker, and what brings us all to our knees, is that this book will not be able to explain the fact that many people more devout and obedient than Gary have prayed for healing and have gone home through the pathway of illness. We can’t even begin to address this reality in the pages contained here. We are here to simply tell you our story—the way God chose to move in our lives, and deal with us. And by you reading the way God chose to deal with us, we pray that our story brings you hope, increases your faith, and stirs a desire in you to trust yourself with our wonderful God. He lavishly loves you and He desperately wants to help you into healing, whether it is spiritual, emotional, mental, or physical.

Jesus promised us, “And you will know the truth, and the truth will make you free” (John 8:32). May God reveal truth to your heart as you read the pages of this book, and may you walk in a greater level of freedom and intimacy with God than ever before.

Family picture prior to Gary’s diagnosis

Chapter 1

It’s Just a Virus

Gary was born on September 17, 1960, in St. Paul, Minnesota. He is the middle son of Shirley and Donovan Brausen, and a true scrapper by nature—he likes this about himself. He likes to work hard and he loves a good challenge. Both athletic and disciplined, he loves to shoot the puck around or, as he says, “put the biscuit in the basket.” This is hockey lingo.

In April of 2010, Gary ran an aggressive nine-mile race through the hilly terrain of Hyland Park. In September of the same year, he turned fifty and celebrated by participating in a duathlon with his friend Scott. He also increased his 6:30 a.m. hockey game with work colleagues to two mornings per week.

The next month he caught a nasty cold. It cleared pretty quickly—nothing to worry about, or so we thought. In November the cold was back but cleared again. The end of December brought the return of that persistent cold, so he finally went to the doctor to try and find out what was wrong—why was this cold continually coming back? The doctor didn’t think too much of it, believing it was just a virus or the remains of seasonal allergies.

By mid-January, however, Gary’s energy was dropping, he was losing weight, and sleep was impeded by a persistent dry cough. He decided to stop playing hockey and running our youngest son’s hockey practices until his energy came back. In late February, he went to the doctor again, but this time as he was leaving the doctor’s office, a stern voice in his head prompted him to request a a chest X-ray. When the radiologist reviewed the X-ray, they found pneumonia—finally a diagnosis. But by early March the aggressive antibiotic wasn’t working and the cough was not only persisting but getting worse. His doctor didn’t want to wait the typical four weeks and ordered another chest X-ray. The pneumonia was still present in his lower left lung, so his doctor ordered a chest CT scan.

It all seems so clean and tidy when I write it this way—yes, nice and orderly. First, a persistent cold, then we think it’s pneumonia…no, it’s not pneumonia; it must be something else. But the truth is that while we were engaged with our busy lives, cancer had entered our house like a thief in the night, pulled up a chair, and had joined us for dinner. And we didn’t even know we had a houseguest.

Somehow, slowly over time we had accepted Gary’s deteriorating state as somewhat normal. He was keeping up his typical athletic pace but it was taking him longer and longer to regain his energy for the next day. His mood had altered; he was more pensive and generally preoccupied.

I picked up the slack, and some resentment, like a vacuum. As he went through boxes of Kleenex, I surprised myself with the amount of excuses I could make for my husband’s changing behavior. Our life, though very normal on the outside, was boiling over on the inside.

Finally, Skip, Gary’s friend and coworker, stopped him in the hall. “Dude, I have to tell you the truth,” he said, “you look like complete crap.” Skip’s candor sent Gary straight into the bathroom to take a long, hard look at himself in the mirror. He thought, “I look like I’m dying.” But never in his wildest imagination did he think it was true.

GOD LEADS THE WAY

If you have ever spent any time in the Bible, you would be quick to notice how gracious God is to His people. Time after time, He chooses the weakest characters to show His glory and His majesty. It’s not very flattering to speak about, but Gary and I fit this description. We were unprepared for cancer—we could have easily been lost in it except for the fact that God was faithful to make our pathway out of illness clear. He did this in a vast array of signs, wonders, prayers, Scriptures, and conversations.

One of the reasons I trust God implicitly is because He is a God who doesn’t change (Malachi 3:6). He is absolutely consistent with who He says He is and how He has always revealed Himself to be. This means that the God who parted the Red Sea, sent the magi to Jesus, and raised Lazarus from the dead, is the same God who wants to be in a relationship with you and me. And when we invite Him into our heart, He brings all His godliness with Him. His favor rests on us. It’s the best hostess gift we will ever receive in our entire lives.

God also considers being in relationship with you to be priceless. He treasures you and your vulnerabilities so completely that He will hold Himself back lest He overpowers you. He allows you to come into a deeper and deeper relationship with Him in your own time, gently prodding you along the way. Yet He is the One who is God.

God knows each and every one of His beloved children, and He loves to delight in each one individually. He knows you better than you know yourself, and because of this He cares for you in the most sensitive ways. Every relationship needs communication, and being in relationship with God is no different. He will speak to you in dreams and visions, signs and wonders, a phrase that catches your ear and sits in your spirit, a passage of Scripture, or even through a song. So if you listen to what He is speaking, He is faithful to answer your prayers, bring you comfort and direction, or even prepare you for a life-altering event.

In August of 2010, just six months before the diagnosis would come, and while Gary was still feeling terrific, our neighbors Fred and Janet joined us in our front yard for a little chat. They were eager yet hesitant to share their story with us. It was actually a sit-down-and-stay-a-while kind of story. And we could tell by their nonverbals that they were unsure of how we would respond.

Fred and Gary are both engineering managers and had a few meetings together for a brief time in 2008. Engineers and managers at that time were required to keep notes of all their meetings. These notebooks are usually the property of the company they work for, but in many cases these notebooks are lost or destroyed as projects finish. Fred was of the engineer variety that kept all of his notebooks throughout the years. Newly retired, he was anxious to burn them. Fred thought that on an average he probably used four notebooks per year for thirty years.

As Fred was telling us his story, he was being very precise about the details, how big the fire was, how hot it became, and how long it burned, making sure we understood the amount of notebooks that were being burned and how many possible pages they contained. He then explained that he thought Gary’s name might have been on about three pages at the most.

Fred told us that this massive fire burned for about seven hours before it finally died down. There was absolutely nothing left of the notebooks except dust, ash, and one small white piece of paper that was not burned at all except for around the edges. Fred was immediately drawn to the paper that was embedded in the ash. He looked at us right in the eye, drawing us deeply into his story. Then he said, “I am not sure what this means, but it means something. Statistically, this isn’t possible. All the paper was burned. It burned for hours. My 2008 notebooks were in the middle stacks, and there was absolutely nothing left of any notebook except this!”

He handed the paper to Gary and my stomach flipflopped. There it was: Gary’s name as clear as could be in the center of small slightly singed piece of paper. It wasn’t until later that we understood the significance of this sign. For now, Gary graciously took the small slip of paper, pondered it for moment, and then put it into his drawer when he went back into the house. He would later tell me that this little sign completely freaked him out and that as soon as he saw his name he started to sweat profusely. The months wore on and we continued with life.

A sign for Gary that he was going to survive the fire

MY JOURNEY TOWARD GOD

In the Bible Jesus often talks about the need to be born again in order to fully understand His lordship and have eternal life. It’s a radical idea to grasp, and one that even the biblical characters struggled to understand at times with Jesus explaining it to them in person.

Needless to say, I struggled with this concept for years. I had grown up Catholic; my dad was a deacon of the Catholic Church who made sure our home was a rich environment of theological discussion. My mom loved to relate to God through service, constantly lending a hand to others in need, even when she was more than exhausted raising her own ten children. Theoretically, I could talk good Bible, I knew God was God and Jesus was His Son, and I loved to serve others, so I thought I was good to go.

As I became a mom myself in 1997, my desire to know God in a new way was undeniable. Who was this God who knit my boys together in my womb? Who was this God who had blessed me with such abundance? I liken my experience to when I was given a handful of M&M’s when I was a kid. I loved the M&M’s I was given—they were colorful, rich, and satisfying, yet they had to come from somewhere. Where was the rest of the bag of M&M’s, and, more importantly, who was holding the bag?

In October of 2000 I realized that the rest of the bag of M&M’s was in the hand of Jesus. I had been living my life with Jesus in my head. I knew all the right answers, but I had not opened up my heart to the possibility of having a one-on-one relationship with our living God. Some would want to blame this on religion, and for a while I was also in this camp—so many rules and laws, and way too many hypocrites.

God would later heal me of this blaming nature though. The reality was harder to accept. I was given many opportunities to open up my heart to the Lord, but I never did. I kept God in my intellect where it was safe—where I could think about Him and know about Him without Him getting too involved in the details of my life. Embracing a truly living God who opened up the secrets of Scripture to me, who desperately wanted to heal my wounds, and grow me in ways unimaginable, was hard to accept. This was especially true since this kind of relationship was going to go beyond Sunday and enter into my every thought, action, and word.

God was meeting me in my heart, in the midst of the good, the bad, and the ugly. He was a God who walked me through the mundane and into the fabulous, all of which are equally important to Him. For a long time I called my transition an “activation” of my faith. Truthfully, I had become a born-again Christian and was uncomfortable with the connotations of this phrase. Yep, I also harbored a whole lot of judgment against those born-again Christians. But as I came to know the Lord in new ways, I prayed that Gary would “activate” his faith too.

GARY’S SIGNIFICANT STEP TOWARD GOD

We attended a nondenominational church called Evergreen, and for whatever reason Gary was hearing the gospel in a new way there. He was intrigued, and for the first time in his life the Bible was making sense to him. At Evergreen, they have a huge wooden cross for people to nail their name to when they have accepted Jesus into their heart as their Savior and Lord. In July of 2009 Gary nailed his name to that cross. And in January of 2011 he nailed his name to that cross a second time because the first time he wasn’t really “all in.”

When Gary came to the Lord the second time, that’s when things really began to change. My strong-minded, intellectual husband was more tender than he had ever been before. He was curious about the journey the boys and I were on. He was willing to ask for prayer, and he was becoming more vulnerable. That might be a little too strong, so for now let’s just say he was more approachable and intrigued about having a relationship with God.

Winter of 2011 pressed on, as did Gary’s deteriorating health. The night before Gary’s February doctor’s appointment, he asked for prayer. “Rosey, my throat is so irritated,” he said. “Will you place your hand on my throat and pray for me?”

Are you kidding me? I had been praying for such a request for nine years. In a New York minute I was at his side with my hand “gently” on his throat. As we prayed, my hand moved to his lower left lung. The room was heavy with the presence of the Holy Spirit. I repeated to Gary what the Holy Spirit spoke into my heart, “Gary, you will need to walk in your healing. I have walked Rosey ahead of you for this purpose. Lean on what I have taught her, and then she will need your prayer.”

We had no idea what to make of those words. Why had my hand moved down to his lower left lung anyway? Gary took “walk in my healing” as a directive, but how? For my part I really didn’t like the last line. Why would I need Gary’s prayers too?

THE DIAGNOSIS

In early March of 2011, our doctor ordered a CT scan. It came back with odd results. There was a milky substance in Gary’s lower left lung, something akin to pneumonia. We were sent to a pulmonologist, who had Gary go through a variety of breathing exercises, and when the testing was complete, he met with us to discuss the results.