The Bulletproof Leader E-Book

Glenn Dorsey

• Herausgeber: BroadStreet Publishing Group, LLC
• Kategorie: Religion und Spiritualität
• Sprache: Englisch
• Veröffentlichungsjahr: 2022

Seitenzahl: 214

Beschreibung

Stop hiding and experience healing.   Leaders share a unique challenge in bridging the gap between their public and personal lives. Unrealistic pressures and demands encourage many to hide or minimize their weaknesses and mistakes. Those who refuse to address their issues privately are often later forced to confront their troubles publicly, leaving them in disgrace.  In The Bulletproof Leader, Glenn Dorsey offers a fresh approach that centers on the development of a leader as a person complete with faults, failures, and feelings. Each chapter contains real-life applications, practical wisdom, and biblical principles, coaching readers on how to - embrace authenticity, - conquer flaws, - establish boundaries, - develop personal accountability, and - cultivate a balanced life.  Become the leader you are meant to be and leave a legacy of blessing.     

Leseprobe

BroadStreet Publishing Group, LLC

Savage, Minnesota, USA

BroadStreetPublishing.com

The Bulletproof Leader: Revealing, Realigning, and Restoring the Heart of a Leader

Copyright © 2022 Glenn Dorsey

978-1-4245-6408-8 (softcover)

978-1-4245-6409-5 (e-book)

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced in any form, except for brief quotations in printed reviews, without permission in writing from the publisher.

Scripture quotations marked NKJV are taken from the New King James Version®. Copyright © 1982 by Thomas Nelson. Used by permission. All rights reserved. Scripture quotations marked NLT are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004, 2015 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, a Division of Tyndale House Ministries, Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved. Scripture quotations marked NIV are taken from The Holy Bible, New International Version® NIV®. Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc.™ Used by permission. All rights reserved worldwide. Scripture quotations marked ESV are taken from the ESV® Bible (The Holy Bible, English Standard Version®), copyright © 2001 by Crossway, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers. Used by permission. All rights reserved. Scripture quotations marked NASB (NASB1995) are taken from the New American Standard Bible® (NASB). Copyright © 1960, 1962, 1963, 1968, 1971, 1972, 1973, 1975, 1977, 1995, 2020 by The Lockman Foundation Used by permission. www.Lockman.org. Scripture quotations marked MSG are taken from THE MESSAGE, copyright © 1993, 2002, 2018 by Eugene H. Peterson. Used by permission of NavPress. All rights reserved. Represented by Tyndale House Publishers, a Division of Tyndale House Ministries. Scripture marked KJV is taken from the King James Version of the Bible, public domain. Scripture quotations marked CEV are taken from the Contemporary English Version Copyright © 1991, 1992, 1995 by American Bible Society. Used by Permission. Scripture quotations marked GW are taken from GOD’S WORD®, copyright © 1995 God’s Word to the Nations. Used by permission of God’s Word Mission Society. Scripture quotations marked CSB are taken from the Christian Standard Bible®. Copyright © 2017 by Holman Bible Publishers. Used by permission. Christian Standard Bible®, and CSB® are federally registered trademarks of Holman Bible Publishers, all rights reserved. Scripture quotations marked JUB (or JBS) are taken from the Jubilee Bible (or Biblia del Jubileo), copyright © 2000, 2001, 2010, 2013 by Life Sentence Publishing, Inc. Used by permission of Life Sentence Publishing, Inc., Abbotsford, Wisconsin. All rights reserved.

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Contents

1Fight Forward

2Love the People You Lead

3Submit to God’s Authority

4Love Yourself

5Embrace Authenticity

6Overcome Failure

7Evaluate Relationships

8Practice Distance

9Guard Your Wellness

10Stay the Path of Freedom

11Prioritize Your Values

12Embrace Your Humanity

Endnotes

About the Author

1

Fight Forward

My heart pounded within my chest. A person I had longed to meet was coming to my place of employment. She whisked into the communications room with a large entourage of people dutifully trailing behind her. She scanned the room and with a confident smile said, “Hello, everyone. My name is Madison.” She captivated the room, and she knew it. Madison was the definition of success. She had carved out a business with a net worth in the millions. On the day that I met her, she was scheduled to film a series of miniature commercials to promote her business. Eager to learn from her success, I waited patiently for an opportunity to speak with her.

During the commercials’ recording, she was articulate, poised, and persuasive. After she delivered her last line, one of her team members approached her, leaned over, and explained that a small group of people had asked for her autograph. Some hoped for a few minutes of casual conversation. Then a different side of her personality emerged. In a condescending tone, she replied, “I am sure you understand my demanding work schedule. I do not have time to socialize with those who work for me.” She grabbed her bag, glared at her assistant, and barked, “We are behind schedule. When are we going to get it together? I do not have time to do my job and yours.” Her assistant would not be the only person to whom she spoke with scorn and publicly humiliated that day.

I remember feeling sorry for her staff because Madison’s private persona did not resemble her public image, which was encouraging, supportive, and approachable. Behind the scenes, she was rude, rough, and self-absorbed. Looking back, I am thankful that she did not have time for a personal conversation.

Now let’s compare Madison to Kate Wynja, a high school senior on the golf team at Sioux Falls Christian School in South Dakota and who won the Class A state golf tournament. She realized later, however, that she had not won at all. In fact, she had made a terrible mistake. On the final hole, a par 5, she posted a four on her scorecard when her actual score was a par 5. She had signed for an incorrect score, and per the rules, disqualification was the result.

Kate made the difficult decision to call a penalty on herself. She reported her mistake to her coach and to tournament officials. It cost her the individual title and cost her team the school’s first team title since 2011. Kate apologized to her team for the mistake she had made.1 She had played by the rules and lost. But Kate understood that it was not about having the best score; it was about everyone playing by the same rules. It was about integrity.

Integrity is taking ownership of our failures, and it means taking responsibility for the damage caused by failure. It’s doing the right thing even at the expense of personal loss, as Kate did. Zig Ziglar once said, “Honesty and integrity are essential for success in life—all areas of life. The really good news is that anyone can develop both honesty and integrity.”2 In fact, successful leaders consistently walk in integrity.

When I think of biblical representations of integrity and successful leadership, my mind drifts to the writings of Paul. In one of his letters, he draws an interesting parallel between successful leaders and athletes. He writes:

Don’t you realize that in a race everyone runs, but only one person gets the prize? So, run to win! All athletes are disciplined in their training. They do it to win a prize that will fade away, but we do it for an eternal prize. So I run with purpose in every step. I am not just shadowboxing. I discipline my body like an athlete, training it to do what it should. Otherwise, I fear that after preaching to others, I myself might be disqualified. (1 Corinthians 9:24–27 NLT)

In this personal admonition, Paul admitted that he worked hard at holding fast to his integrity as a leader. He owned up to the fact that he had to exert discipline and self-control if he wanted to complete his assignment with honor and uprightness. I have often found confidence in this Scripture passage because I long to complete my journey without negative marks on my record.

My heart is to be a positive influence and an example to those who follow in my footsteps. It’s difficult at times, but I crave a level of humility that forces me to find the courage to submit to correction. Like Paul, I want to recognize any fractures that would derail my focus and, if necessary, throw a red flag to call a penalty on my actions. Most of all, I long for the incorruptible crown given to those who firmly fasten their focus on the race set before them. This level of personal awareness and introspection fosters trust and carves out character.

In the ancient book of 2 Kings, we read an obscure but accurate tale about character, and it references a man named Gehazi. Gehazi was selected to serve Elisha, one of the most influential leaders of his generation. If we are honest, it was the kind of opportunity that most leaders in training would kill for. Gehazi was awarded a front seat to some of the greatest miracles in history. It was not unusual for Elisha to bless a woman’s barren womb and for that woman to receive the blessing of new life nine months later. It was not surprising when a leper received healing. It was not unheard of when angelic armies appeared out of thin air. It was not extraordinary when Elisha spoke to a dead boy who suddenly stood to attention. Yes, Gehazi had an opportunity that every up-and-coming leader coveted and a position that no one would want to lose.

If we continue to read the book of Kings, we read in the fifth chapter of the second book how a prominent leader named Naaman received healing after following Elisha’s prophetic instructions. Desiring to compensate Elisha, Naaman offered him a bountiful reward, including silver, gold, and designer apparel. However, Elisha refused the gesture and sent Naaman on his way. This should be where the story slams shut, but it continues.

In an abrupt turn of events, Gehazi contacted Naaman and set up a covert meeting. Weaving a web of deception, Gehazi managed to obtain all the gifts Naaman had offered Elisha and more. Now read what unfolded when Gehazi met with Elisha:

When he went in to his master, Elisha asked him, “Where have you been, Gehazi?” “I haven’t been anywhere,” he replied. But Elisha asked him, “Don’t you realize that I was there in spirit when Naaman stepped down from his chariot to meet you? Is this the time to receive money and clothing, olive groves and vineyards, sheep and cattle, and male and female servants? Because you have done this, you and your descendants will suffer from Naaman’s leprosy forever.” When Gehazi left the room, he was covered with leprosy; his skin was white as snow. (2 Kings 5:25–27 NLT)

Gehazi, one of the most promising talents in the land, not only lost the coveted position but also befell an awful fate. He had charisma but fell short on honor. He lacked the character to handle the power. Gehazi could have been the next Elisha, but he forfeited his future because he lacked integrity.

I remember a comical story that echoes the lesson of Gehazi, and it’s been handed down for years. A man came to his friend and asked for prayer because false rumors were being spread about him. The friend told him, “Do not pay any attention to those rumors. Those lies will not hurt you.” The man’s face went pale as he replied, “But you do not understand; the people telling the lies are about to prove them true.” Though fictitious, it’s a reminder that our actions catch up to us.

Here’s a true story that illustrates the same message. One day a young man knocked on my door. One glance at his troubled face was enough to clue me in that this young man was experiencing great emotional pain. After a cup of coffee, we arrived at the truth: He was disappointed in his pastor, whom he held in great esteem. Over the years, they had developed a deep friendship, and his pastor was like a second father. The young man had never admired a man more than he admired his pastor, and he longed to be just like the man whom he perceived his pastor to be. Simply put, his pastor was his hero.

However, over the last year, he had noticed flaws in his pastor that he could not ignore. A few months before, someone confronted the young man about a back payment his pastor would not settle. At first, he thought there must have been a mix-up. Indeed, there was a reasonable explanation for the confusion. Nevertheless, the pastor’s wife later came to the young man, weeping about the financial dilemma their family was facing among a series of questionable, seemingly unethical business decisions her husband had made.

But that was not all. I could tell from the way the young man shifted around in his seat that the most disturbing part of the story was about to unfold. Sure enough, the man discovered that his pastor was cheating on his wife with a lady in the church. As he sat and poured out his grief, I could feel his pain. It wasn’t just the pain of another person’s failures that he was experiencing; doubts of his mentor’s morality began to surface. With a quiver in his voice, he said, “If a man as great as he is can fall, how can I be sure I won’t fall as well? How will I ever be able to trust another pastor?”

It’s hard to admit, but this kind of occurrence happens more than I want to acknowledge. As Bill Hybels remarked on the chasm between leadership and morality, “People will not follow a leader with moral incongruities for long. Every time you compromise character, you compromise leadership. The foundation of firm leadership is character.”3

As a young, impressionable pastor, I had a ringside seat to international ministers of influence. I remember admiring one minister so much that I considered resigning from my small church to help him. Then this man whom I admired most made a near-fatal misstep. His moral failure made headlines, and my heart took a hard turn in the opposite direction. I remember standing in front of my television watching a network broadcast when another well-known minister addressed the salacious headlines. His words still echo in my head, “What is wrong with your church? Immorality does not come as a shock to me. Don’t you understand these are just men! They are just like you and me, flesh.”

Those headlines were not the only ones to ripple through Christianity that year. A handful of other ministers also made costly moral mistakes. Though publicly shamed, several of those men found solid footing in their faith over time. They repented, went through counseling, submitted to authority, and picked up the shattered pieces. Today, their ministries are once again thriving.

When I think of public scandals, my mind lands on Samson, a biblical icon. Samson failed as much as he succeeded. As a leader, he made terrible choices that led him into shameful situations. His involvement with a woman cost him his physical strength, his sight, and his freedom. Enslaved by his adversaries, Samson asked God to give him the strength to win one more battle, and through a sovereign act of mercy, God granted Samson’s request. If you have not read through this story in a while (Judges 13–16), I encourage you to do so. You will discover that Samson’s final battle was a win of epic proportions.

Just flip on the news or scroll through social media and a list of famous people who have failed will roll across your timeline. In the recent past, a string of politicians and religious leaders have found themselves in courtrooms facing a myriad of civil accusations. Even the FBI has come under scrutiny for falsifying documents to our court system. Influential leaders who appear to be one way in public so often turn out to be the opposite behind closed doors.

The reality is that the human psyche longs for infallible influencers and faultless leaders. Intuitively, we turn ordinary humans into superhumans. We imagine them to be intellectually superior, uniquely gifted, or empowered with a perfect personality. We magnify their strengths and diminish their weaknesses. We convince ourselves that the people we admire possess few or no faults. More often than not, we fail to remember that they, too, are equally flawed, and we’re disappointed when they fall short of our expectations.

Leaders are humans, and their failures should not shock us. Failure is a rite of passage for those who succeed. It is the premium for learning by experience. Those who think success stories do not include failure need to consider The University of Southern California’s School of Cinematic Arts, which rejected Steven Spielberg not once but twice.4 He would later produce movies that grossed more than $9 billion and earn three Academy Awards. Walt Disney is another failure-to-fame story. A newspaper editor fired him, criticizing his drawings and claiming they “lacked imagination.”5 Today Walt’s enterprise is valued at $165 billion. Oprah Winfrey was fired from her first job in television but later became a billionaire who owns a television network. Although some leaders may seem like overnight sensations, the truth is that their beginnings are often messy.

Let’s revisit the Bible, specifically the middle of the book of John, where we read another story of seemingly messy beginnings. Jesus learned that his good friend Lazarus had died. Four days later, Jesus arrived at the burial site, and Lazarus’s family complained that Jesus was too late. Jesus locked eyes on them and proclaimed that he was right on schedule. When others thought Lazarus’s life had ended, Jesus knew it was just the beginning. In a loud voice, Jesus commanded those in charge to remove the stone that sealed the tomb. You can imagine the mockery and critical accusations hurled his way. Nevertheless, they followed his instructions. Now pay close attention to what happened next: “Jesus shouted, ‘Lazarus, come out!’ And the dead man came out, his hands and feet bound in graveclothes, his face wrapped in a headcloth. Jesus told them, ‘Unwrap him and let him go!’” (John 11:43–44 NLT).

As we think through this scene, we can see that Jesus went out of his way to rescue Lazarus. By removing the lid from the tomb, Jesus did away with every obstacle that would prevent Lazarus from hearing his voice. He called him out of the dark place that had the word death stamped all over it. However, even with all that Jesus did, Lazarus still had to initiate faith steps and walk out of the grave. The same is true in our lives. If we want Jesus to rescue us, we have to do our part to separate ourselves from things holding us captive.

Now, let us consider one last thing before we wrap up the story of Lazarus. When John communicates this story, he intentionally includes that although Lazarus walked out of the grave, he remained bound in burial cloths. That one detail should make us go silent with wonder. He was alive but still bound. Maybe that describes your situation in some way. There are parts of your life that are fully alive and other parts that you know need freedom. In a caring way, Jesus told the disciples to “Unwrap him and let him go!” Jesus was not satisfied that his friend was alive. He wanted to unravel the things that kept Lazarus bound so that he could walk freely.

God is not just merciful to people named Samson. He is equally invested in you and me. The grace he gave Samson is the same grace he longs to give to you. He is equally as passionate about rescuing us and helping us walk in freedom as he was with Lazarus.

Maybe you are in a place of failure. Perhaps your situation didn’t make headlines, but it rocked your world nonetheless. Let me encourage you, for at one time or another, we have all found ourselves slipping away from solid ground. Whether our indiscretions made seismic waves or slight ripples, the path to recovery is the same. In times of failure, we must reach for repentance, restoration, and reconciliation.

Over the years, I have tried to understand why some leaders fall at the first round of fire and why others seem ethically immune to failure. After wrestling with this question, I’ve come to understand that the answer—the common denominator among these failures—can be traced back to a lack of personal accountability and transparency. If we are unconscious of and unwilling to own up to our vulnerabilities, weaknesses, or character flaws, then they destroy us over time. That’s why the practice of safeguarding our souls must be a priority, not an act of penance.

I personally admire leaders who take care of issues on the front end rather than waiting for the situation to become a crisis. And trust me, leaders who care about their relationships and reputations proactively shield what matters most to them, including their spouses, their ministries, and their jobs. I recently read an article that revealed that former vice president Mike Pence refuses to eat alone with a woman or attend an event where alcohol is served unless his wife is present. As soon as this news dropped, critics mocked his boundary and went so far as saying that his actions could be a violation of anti-discrimination laws.6 Seriously. Imagine that someone would be brazen enough to pursue legal action against a high-profile leader because he would not put himself in a compromising situation.

We cannot be too cautious when leading from a place of authenticity and transparency. If you want to get serious about protecting yourself from weakness that could unravel your life, I encourage you to master accountability. Be open and responsible in your relationships. Keep a record of your conversations. Let others know your whereabouts. Moreover, be transparent enough to honestly answer questions that relate to your integrity and proudly show that you have nothing to hide.

My purpose in writing this book is to draw out the greatness hidden within you. This is not a book to teach the principles of leadership or how to be a better leader. It is to help make the leader better—bulletproof. The bulletproof leader walks in absolute confidence of their identity. They are impervious to critics who do not accept them. They live an open, transparent life. They have no fear of a successful attack on their character because maintaining their character is more important to them than maintaining their job. The bulletproof leader leverages their failures as lessons that help them become even better. Their conscience is clear. They surround themselves with people who add to whatever they may lack in their life. They are free to be themselves. They are unstoppable.

As we journey through this book, I trust you will begin to see the benefits of leading an authentic and transparent life. I believe the truths within each chapter will empower you to live above reproach and without regret. I believe we are stronger when we refuse to be anyone other than who we indeed are.

Our assignment in life, our personal calling, and our influence are important to the One who created us. He does not simply look at our struggles; he looks at the positive situations that can come from them. If you are willing to be honest and transparent, God will highlight areas of your life in need of transformation. He has not changed his mind about you or the purpose he has for your life. God held your future long before you made your first mistake or took that near-fatal fall. If you find yourself in need of grace, reach out and allow God to write an epic ending into your story. Fight forward and regain whatever you might have lost.

2

Love the People You Lead

I stood behind a large podium and spoke to a full audience. Halfway through my presentation, I looked down and made a startling discovery: My pants were missing. I couldn’t imagine why. Panic set in as a thousand questions flashed through my mind. How could I have forgotten to put on pants? How was I going to get out of the room without someone seeing me? More importantly, what would people think of me? The audience appeared oblivious, so I continued to speak. As I approached the end of my presentation, desperation overcame my emotions. I jolted awake, and it took a few moments for me to realize that my nightmare was nothing more than a tormenting scenario of my subconscious imagination. If you have ever had a nightmare that was hard to shake, you understand the nature of what I experienced that night. I admit I had to down a few cups of coffee to subdue my feelings from the dream.

Over the years, I have read studies that conclude that our unsettling dreams often stem from anxiety and the feeling of being unprepared for something that looms in the future. Oddly, my nightmare reminded me of the story of the first man and woman. If we were to dust off the first ancient book of Genesis, we would read how their real-life experience was not all that different from my nightmare.

Long before Adam and Eve found themselves in a mess, God warned them not to eat from the Tree of Knowledge of Good and Evil. But instead of following God’s instructions, they took unwise counsel from something, or rather someone, with a sinister plan. If you read the story closely, you will discover that Eve followed the serpent’s suggestion and ate from the forbidden tree. And she didn’t stop with her own indulgence either; she convinced her husband to follow in her footsteps. With one bite of the forbidden fruit (and just like my nightmare), the couple suddenly stood naked before all of creation (Genesis 3).