Invitations from God E-Book

Adele Ahlberg Calhoun

• Herausgeber: IVP Formatio
• Kategorie: Religion und Spiritualität
• Serie: Transforming Resources
• Sprache: Englisch
• Veröffentlichungsjahr: 2011

Seitenzahl: 314

Beschreibung

Some invitations we desperately want: "Will you marry me?" "Would you consider a promotion?" Other invitations we never want to receive but must respond to all the same: "What treatment do you want for your tumor?" Invitations pound away at the coastlines of the soul with a transforming force.God is also sending invitations. Sometimes they seem less compelling than anything on my to-do list. Why would I want to say yes to the invitation to rest when I'm already so far behind? Why follow when I could lead? Why accept invitations to weep or to admit I am wrong or to wait? Saying yes might slow me down, sabotage my agenda and even undo who I think I am.Adele Calhoun, author of the popular Spiritual Disciplines Handbook, offers a book about invitations like these—divine invitations we miss or ignore because we've said yes to going with the cultural flow.While these invitations from God can sometimes be difficult to accept, they can heal and restore even as they shape where we go, what we do and who we become. What we say yes to, what we say no to forms the terrain of our future.Included in this book are reflection questions and exercises as well as overview charts with recommended disciplines to guide you through each theme. As you attend to the often hidden, quiet voice of the Great Inviter, you will find yourself as God created you to be.

Leseprobe

“I am so grateful to Adele Calhoun for reminding us that life is brimming with divine invitations. A wise and gracious guide, she teaches us how to hear the overtures of God and to respond to them with a resounding, ‘Yes!’ This book will richly nourish your soul.”

Ian Morgan Cron, author of Chasing Francis: A Pilgrim’s Tale

“I have known Adele Calhoun since seminary days, and I have seen her face many of the divine invitations named in this book, as well as help other people navigate through them. She is a wise and godly guide!”

Tim Keller, pastor, Redeemer Presbyterian Church, New York City

“Learning how to attend responsively to God’s invitations leads us into wholeness, freedom and transformation. Thanks for reminding us that Jesus continually invites us to come close, draw near and follow him via these pathways of grace, healing and joy.”

Stephen A. Macchia, president, Leadership Transformations, Inc., and author of Becoming a Healthy Church

“This is a lovely book that helps us to hear and respond to God’s most winsome and challenging invitations—invitations for our good and our growth. Read it and be blessed!”

Ruth Haley Barton, founder, Transforming Center, and author of Sacred Rhythms

“This is a book you will want to read and reread and then keep on your nightstand to refer to constantly for all the insight available in its pages. I found it so refreshing that a book of such depth would be of such use in my everyday spiritual walk. It is unique to find a work that puts you in touch with your own soul in a way that makes you want to live your life in the best way possible. I am changed by these invitations from God.”

Dee Yaccino, Del Camino Connection

“What a wonderful book so full of riches! Practical, profound, seasoned, thoughtful, challenging. I can’t wait to recommend it to our church.”

Pete Scazzero, pastor and author of Emotionally Healthy Spirituality

Invitations from God

Accepting God's Offer to Rest, Weep, Forgive, Wait, Remember and More

Formatio books from InterVarsity Press follow the rich tradition of the church in the journey of spiritual formation. These books are not merely about being informed, but about being transformed by Christ and conformed to his image. Formatio stands in InterVarsity Press’s evangelical publishing tradition by integrating God’s Word with spiritual practice and by prompting readers to move from inward change to outward witness. InterVarsity Press uses the chambered nautilus for Formatio, a symbol of spiritual formation because of its continual spiral journey outward as it moves from its center. We believe that each of us is made with a deep desire to be in God’s presence. Formatio books help us to fulfill our deepest desires and to become our true selves in light of God’s grace.

InterVarsity Press P.O. Box 1400 Downers Grove, IL 60515-1426 World Wide Web: www.ivpress.com E-mail: [email protected]

­ 2011 by Adele Ahlberg Calhoun

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced in any form without written permission from InterVarsity Press.

InterVarsity Press­ is the book-publishing division of InterVarsity Christian Fellowship/USA­, a movement of students and faculty active on campus at hundreds of universities, colleges and schools of nursing in the United States of America, and a member movement of the International Fellowship of Evangelical Students. For information about local and regional activities, write Public Relations Dept. InterVarsity Christian Fellowship/USA, 6400 Schroeder Rd., P.O. Box 7895, Madison, WI 53707-7895, or visit the IVCF website at www.intervarsity.org.

All Scripture quotations, unless otherwise indicated, are taken from the Holy Bible, New International Version­. niv­. Copyright ­1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc.­ Used by permission. All rights reserved worldwide.

While all stories in this book are true, some names and identifying information in this book have been changed to protect the privacy of the individuals involved.

Design: Cindy Kiple Images:

man standing under tree: © Blanca van der Werf/Trevillion Images

hot wax stamp: inxti74/depositphotos

fingerprint: © Mark Trost/iStockphoto

ISBN 978-0-8308-6870-4

For

Doug, Nathaniel and Annaliese

the constant

Contents

Introduction: The Invitation-Shaped Life

1. Invitation to Participate in Your Own Healing

2. Invitation to Follow

3. Invitation to Practice the Presence of People

4. Invitation to Rest

5. Invitation to Weep

6. Invitation to Admit I Might Be Wrong

7. Invitation to Forgive

8. Invitation to Wait

9. Invitation to Pray

10. Invitation to Remember

11. Invitation to the Most Excellent Way

Gratitudes

Notes

About the Author

Additional Resources

Introduction

The Invitation-Shaped Life

Invitations are powerful. Like tides, they ebb and flow, shaping the contours of our existence. Some invitations we desperately want but never get—“Will you marry me?” or “Would you consider a promotion?” Other invitations we never want to receive but must honor all the same—“We are letting you go,” “The test came back positive,” or “Your baby has Down syndrome.” Invitations pound away at the coastlines of the soul. They contain a transforming force that can carve out possible and impossible futures.

No one escapes the forming motion of invitations. All the kids in the neighborhood are invited over for a playdate down the street; your child gets the call, but the kid next door doesn’t. The list for the traveling team is posted; both parent and child hold their breaths to see who made the list. A daughter doesn’t get invited to prom. A father isn’t invited to give his daughter away. An aging relative isn’t invited to a holiday dinner because poor hearing and dementia make it less fun for everyone. Raw and sensitive places form inside us.

Invitations shape who we know, where we go, what we do and who we become. Invitations can challenge and remake us. They can erode and devastate. And they can also heal and restore us. Being wanted, welcomed, invited and included are some of the most mending experiences on the planet.

For many years I have watched invitations ripple across lives. An event organizer I know dipped into pain and depression when all the volunteers—except the organizer himself—were invited to a celebratory dinner. During graduate school, a man I knew invited every woman in the library on a date. I witnessed the devastation on his face when each woman he asked said no.

I have had my own experiences of being turned out of individual hearts, as well as out of groups where I had once been invited. Yet I also have had invitations into lives and opportunities wondrously beyond my ability to comprehend.

Whether we wait for sleepovers or lunch dates, birthday parties or job offers, deals or weddings, everyone waits. Some wait for the invitations; others wait for the RSVPs. The giving and receiving of invitations offers something essential to our sense of well-being. Invitations assure us that we are wanted, welcomed and included. Not being invited sends destructive messages into the most vulnerable part of our souls. At the deepest level, these messages are often lies: “You are not worth knowing,” “You are unwanted,” “You don’t matter,” or “No one cares about you.” Like the fingers of a cancerous tumor, these lies can devour our life. They come straight from the father of lies who plants untruth, like a malignancy, to do its soul-destroying work.

The things we say yes to and the things we say no to determine the terrain of our future. My convoluted journey is posted with invitations, and my RSVPs account for the twists and turns. Sometimes, half in love with my own self-destruction, I see a sign inviting me to “Stop!”—and I blow right through it anyway. Life is happening somewhere other than where I am, and I fear missing out on it. I choose my way, which is usually a fast track to somewhere or other. Other times I determine to follow Jesus and then anguish about which invitations are his. Which invitations appeal because I want to “make a difference”? Which ones do I avoid because they seem insignificant or ordinary?

Invitations from people I admire or enjoy can divert me from invitations that might be wiser for my family and better for my soul. Invitations can get so snarled up with zeal, naïveté and the need to prove myself that I say yes to the wrong things. Still, there are moments of trustful knowing when I sense that my yes or no comes from God. Learning to listen and respond to God’s invitations is the path to real freedom. Invitations from God bring healing and liberation from the gnawing lies of the enemy.

RSVP

Navigating invitations is no small matter. Jesus tells a story in Luke 14:16-23 that gets at how easily we miss the most important invitations of all. “A certain man was preparing a great banquet and invited many guests. At the time of the banquet he sent his servant to tell those who had been invited, ‘Come, for everything is now ready.’ But they all alike began to make excuses” (Lk 14:16-18).

One had just bought a field, another had just bought five yoke of oxen, and a third had just gotten married. They were all busy, with better things to do. So they refused the invitation. “Please excuse me,” they said; “I cannot come.”

How do you navigate the variety of invitations that come your way? Let’s look at four types of invitations that you probably field on a regular basis.

Jesus’ parable makes it clear that there are business and career invitations. Some people had real estate that demanded attention, and others had invested in oxen that needed tending so as to increase profitability margins. Our own workplaces are not so different. They invite us to more productivity, vision, initiative and profitability. Business invitations often come in the form of questions: “Do you have the right people in the right seats on the bus?” “What is your BHAG (Big, Hairy, Audacious Goal)?” “How can our goals for this year top last year’s?” “What is your growth rate?” “What is your five-year plan? Your ten-year plan? Your strategic plan? Your business plan? Your self-improvement plan?” These questions are invitations to expect more and more and more. Their answers provide fuel to make things happen. Saying yes to invitations of the workplace may make you a business success, but saying yes also comes with consequences. We can get so busy, stressed and driven that we don’t RSVP to God’s invitations. Like the people in the parable, we say no because business comes first.

Jesus’ parable also includes family invitations. One of those invited had just gotten married and used that as a reason to say no. Every family system comes with invitations. Invitations to spend holidays and take vacations with certain extended family members or friends that exclude other family members or friends. Invitations to parent in particular ways. Invitations to volunteer for this committee or that worthy cause. Invitations to be home more or less. Invitations to climb a social ladder, join a certain club, spend more or spend less, or downsize or upsize. Repercussions of invitations given or withheld reverberate over generations. Our individual responses to these invitations are not just private; they have a way of throwing off family equilibrium and setting individual priorities at cross purposes. Dad refuses the wedding invitation because he doesn’t approve of the match. A sibling refuses the invitation to the family reunion unless there is an apology. A sister invites one sister to her room and tells the other to “stay out.” And then there is the constant litany of “invitations” to “Shut up,” “Speak up,” “Get up,” or “Fess up.” Invitations are relentless and carry tremendous emotional freight.

Educational invitations, which offer opportunities for self- improvement and enrichment, are endless. In the past year I have taken continuing education courses at the local high school and Loyola University. In the fall I will learn icon painting. My husband is learning Spanish online. At age forty-five, a good friend of ours with an information technology background took a second bachelor’s degree.

Children, of course, are flooded with invitations to learn. When my children were at home, our mailbox was flooded with glossy catalogs and brochures inviting them to camps and extracurricular programs: this sports team, that theater experience, this cooking class, that music course. On and on the invitations go. Learn horseback riding. Take the SAT prep. Study a foreign language. Saying yes to these invitations supposedly gives your child a leading edge in the competitive world ahead of them.

Finally, there are entertainment and social invitations. In Jesus’ parable, a certain man invites folks to a party. Our world is filled with invitations that divert and entertain. Invitations to be on the go, in the loop and having fun never stop. Indeed, our commitment to fun is so strong that Neil Postman described us as a people who are “amusing ourselves to death.” Entertainment is a multimillion-dollar enterprise devoted to keeping us diverted. Actors, musicians and TV personalities invite us to see the new movie and get the latest CD. If it’s a nice day, amusement parks, water parks, national parks and even the park across the street invite us to leave work behind and go in search of fun. We can play sports or watch sports. We can accept the trial invitation to the health club. We can go to a party or to the beach. We can climb a mountain or use the invitational coupon at the new restaurant down the street. If none of these things appeal, there is always Xbox, Wii, Facebook, Twitter and TV, with anything on demand at any time. If technology is not our thing, we have board games, yard games, theaters and museums that invite us to enjoy.

Our culture invites us to experience everything! If we fail to take advantage of it all, we think we are missing out. But honestly, the web of invitations we are called to navigate is massive and complicated. In an attempt to say yes to as much as possible, people burn the candle at both ends. I love the lines from Edna St. Vincent Millay’s poem “First Fig”: “My candle burns at both ends / It will not last the night; / But ah, my foes, and oh, my friends— / It gives a lovely light!”

Invitation Status

In our culture, the more invitations that come our way, the more valuable we are considered to be. The more clubs or associations we belong to, the more status we have—especially if we had to be nominated and wait to be invited in. By saying yes to the invitations, we prove that we are important, wanted and—of course—busy. The truth, however, is that when we say yes to invitations that keep us compulsively busy, we may be exhibiting a lazy ambivalence that actually keeps us distracted from the invitations that matter most. Squeezing every margin to the max, we are left with less time and space to respond to the invitations from God. We want to enjoy life, but ironically our many yeses to invitations keep us stressed, drained and inattentive to the divine invitations that bring real freedom and belonging. So it is that we say, “I can’t come. I’m really busy. Please excuse me,” to the most important invitation we receive. We’ve chosen to say yes to things besides God.

Clearly not all invitations are created equal. Each of us trusts some invitations more than others. Some of us trust invitations of the marketplace as though they reflect God’s own orchestration. They are the way we forge an identity and get ahead. Business invitations to productivity, success and numerical growth are so compelling that increasingly pastors and church leaders say yes to them more than to God’s invitations to wait or remember. An editorial in Christianity Today put it like this: “It’s no secret that too many evangelical leaders are captivated more by business culture than biblical culture, spending more time absorbed in strategies and effectiveness and relatively little time in prayer. No, it doesn’t have to be an either-or situation, but let’s face it, it often is.” We should also note that while Jesus had the biggest work assignment in human history—he had been invited to “save the world”—he never spent weeks writing a vision statement with steps for strategically reaching the world with the gospel.

Educational invitations appeal because they offer knowledge, opportunity and—let’s face it—power. Invitations to compete in sporting events are not just good exercise but become part of a child’s résumé. These invitations can seem so sensible that the idea they may be missing other invitations escapes us all. The angst and family energy poured into the educational and athletic choices for children so easily distract from seemingly less high-stake invitations to be in a youth group, attend church, eat with the family or go on a missions trip. But children aren’t the only ones distracted by entertainment and athletics. Adults, too, build their lives around summering on the Cape or devoting winter weekends to skiing. And sometimes snowbirds skip town, moving down to Florida and Arizona until the sun returns up north.

As the flood of invitations from organizations, business, charities, family entertainment, athletics, fitness and education pull us in their wake, we must grab a branch and take stock. Are we ignoring the invitations that matter most? If God were to ask us, “What did you do with the fifteen years of evenings, weekends and vacation that you had in life?” would we answer, “Well, I watched TV, worked out and sat on the beach”? Do we have any idea what God’s invitations to us are? Do our yeses to invitations simply divert or stroke our ego? Or do they nurture and grow body, soul and spirit? Do they build connections within the body of Christ and bring health to our marriage and family? Do the invitations we accept make us more free or less? Which invitations are shaping your world?

What we do with the invitations we receive dramatically affects how we do church. Invitations can be wonderful things, but the health and growth of the soul and the church do not primarily reside in business, educational or entertainment invitations. The growth of the church and the soul resides in responding to the invitations of God.

God’s invitations are meant to mend, shape, anchor and grow us into the character of Jesus. They call us into our true selves in Christ. They free us from the lie that says, “The more invitations the better.” Invitations from the Holy One serve God’s dream for the world. They don’t call me to become what I produce, what others think of me or what I know. They invite me to be free. And freedom comes from being an intentional follower of Jesus—one who is a little Christ in this world.

God the Great Inviter

With our track record for cavalierly ignoring God-given invitations, I am amazed that God continues to send out the invites. As the first and the great Inviter, God devotes himself to sending out invitations to come join his divine community. How easily we miss the magnitude and honor of this invitation. A self-sufficient, joyful Trinity reaches out with welcome: “Come and join us. Please RSVP.”

God’s invitations begin with inviting all that is into being and into relationship with him: “Let there be . . .” Let there be quarks and nebula. Let there be butterflies and squid. Let there be male and female. Let there be you! When God breathed the breath of life into you, you were given the gift of being. Beings are made to connect, to interact and to love. The gift of being is an invitation to be in relationship with the great Inviter.

God initiates relationship. God invited Abraham, the Hebrew people, Isaac, Jacob, Moses, Gideon, David, prophets, fishermen, tax collectors, outcasts, women, men, crowds, enemies, betrayers, liars and children to know him and be with him. It doesn’t matter if you were on the paid staff of hell: God’s invitation goes out to you again and again. Everyone is equally yet uniquely invited into God’s world and God’s heart. Not one tribe or people group is excluded. The great Inviter says, “Come to my dinner party. Come be with me and meet my guests.”

God’s divine invitations come to us in church, in Scripture, in music, in art, in nature, in moral failure, in disappointments, in joy, in the words of friends and even in the words of enemies. God is humble enough to use the flower in your garden or perhaps even this book to invite you deeper into his love and call on your life.

No matter how God’s invitations get delivered, they let us know that we are wanted, loved, named and known. The divine community of God longs for us to RSVP. As we accept the divine invitations, an inner knowing of our belonging to God takes root. This root taps into the healing wisdom and love of God, and it braces us against the storm of deforming lies that we are unwanted and don’t matter to anyone unless we produce. In our yeses to God, trust blossoms out as fruit and freedom.

Without the lived experience of risking (which is another word for trusting) God’s invitations, our Christianity can devolve into dogma that rattles around in our heads. Some people spend years of their lives in church, believing all the right things but lacking an inner sense of being invited into God’s own heart. The Bible is full of examples of religious people whose faith began with right answers or actions but who missed invitations of the Holy One.

In the Gospels we see how Jesus navigated invitations while responding to and extending God’s invitations. Invitations come to him from everywhere:

From religious people and political leaders, who invited Jesus to prove his credibility (Mt 12:38; 16:1; Lk 23:2-12)

From family and friends, who invited him to dinner and to help others (Lk 8:19; 10:38; Jn 2:1-4)

From the devil, who invited Jesus to prove who he was by doing something amazing and spectacular (Lk 4:1-13)

Yet Jesus understood how to listen to God’s invitations first. So when his popularity soared, he knew how to step away from the invitation to ride the momentum (Mk 1:37; 4:36; 11:8-11). Jesus doesn’t let the crowd crown him king but leaves and goes to Bethany. When invited to curry favor with the powers that be or to hang out with the movers and shakers, Jesus knew how to say no (Lk 15:1-2; 19:5, 45; 20:8, 45-47). When Jesus hit the ball out of the park with his healing and exorcisms, people invited him to stay and maximize his success. But Jesus heard another invitation. Jesus’ RSVP to God kept him free enough to go somewhere else (Mk 1:38; 3:7; 5:1).

I understand the pressure of invitations. I am particularly prone to say yes to invitations that hook my ego. It’s appalling, but I will travel across the country to give a talk on, say, “spiritual formation.” But I wouldn’t walk across the street to hear a similar talk coming out of someone else’s mouth. That’s because it’s no longer about me. Invitations that bring notoriety, money, travel and amusement can shape my life more than invitations that come straight from God.

Responding to God’s Invitations

Jesus knew his spiritual journey depended on responsiveness to God’s invitations. Although his job was the most crucial in human history, Jesus did not get compulsive, preoccupied or unable to practice the presence of God or people. In the midst of interruptions and overwhelming need, Jesus learned how to discern between invitations. He learned discernment by first saying yes to God’s invitations to rest, wait, pray, forgive, remember and love. Time with God was not a luxury that got squeezed out when business picked up. God’s invitation to “save the world” didn’t stop Jesus from attending to his own soul in the process. Saying yes to the invitation to be with God was the wellspring of his heart and the source of all his actions.

Jesus’ initiative came out of God’s invitations. Board rooms, best practices, target groups, groundswells and his own best calls did not determine his agenda. God’s invitations directed his movements.

When pressed to rush to a dying girl, Jesus stopped to talk to a woman who surreptitiously touched him in a crowd. He invited her to identify herself and her desire (Mk 5:25-34).

When invited to meet everyone’s felt needs, Jesus refused (Mk 1:37-38; 5:18-19).

When invited to meet family expectations, Jesus refused (Mk 3:31-35).

When invited to define family in a narrow way, Jesus refused and included all who do “the will of God” (Mk 3:35).

When encouraged to send hungry people away, Jesus invited the disciples to feed them (Mk 6:37).

Jesus invited companionship at high and low moments (Mt 26:36-38; Mk 9:2-8).

When people outside the “target group” of Israel invited Jesus to help, Jesus didn’t always say no (Mk 7:26-29; Lk 17:11-17).

Jesus invited children, women, tax collectors and sinners to be with him (Mk 10:13-14; 2:15-17).

Jesus invited a young successful seeker to sell all he had and follow (Mk 10:17-21).

Jesus invited people to “not fear,” to “have faith,” to “follow me,” to “withdraw,” to “come apart and rest” and to lose their life to gain it (Mk 5:36; 11:22; 1:17; 3:7; 8:34).

Jesus’ actions, in and of themselves, often make no sense unless we see them as responses to some hidden invitation—an invitation received from time spent alone with his Father. When Jesus was interrupted while “on task,” and when people pressed him with needs, the expectations of others easily could have set the agenda. But Jesus categorically refused to get caught up in the invitations that brought grandiosity, compulsivity, anxiety and drivenness. Jesus slowed down and waited to hear God’s invitations and initiatives. He thought nothing of climbing a mountain or traipsing out into the desert for time alone with his Father. In the midst of activity, this consistent rhythm deeply and finely tuned Jesus’ receptiveness and responsiveness to divine invitations.

God invites me out of doing, driving and striving. I can RSVP to the invitation in various ways. I can say, “Yes, your invitation be done,” or “Not now,” or “Sometime”—or even “Not on your life!” Not so very long ago, during what I now call the “Year of the Great Ambush,” God clearly sent me the invitation to love and forgive. But I had been so hurt and betrayed that this invitation felt like death. So I resisted, went with the flow and put on ten pounds. My ego wanted what it wanted. Saying yes to the great Inviter was painstaking, deliberate and exhausting. Then again, invitations to follow Jesus are not necessarily easy. Jesus was invited to take up his cross; I have no reason to expect I won’t be invited to do the same.

On the other hand, God’s invitations can at times be over-the-top sweet. “Of course I want to train church leaders in the Dominican Republic!” “I’d love to adopt a Compassion child!” “I am excited to teach an adult education course in my community!” Sometimes God’s invitations exactly match our own desires, and we can say yes with enthusiasm.

Although my responses to God’s invitations are not consistent, I am sure of one thing: God’s invitations never dry up. If I fail to RSVP, God doesn’t cross me off the “A-list.” The invitations keep coming: inviting me to begin again, inviting me to prepare for life in the course of life, inviting me to prepare for ministry in the course of ministry. The invitations are not intended for later—someday when everything quiets down and things become sane. They’re not intended for “any day now,” after my kids go to college or after I move. The invitations are intended for now, even as I juggle too many balls and drown in too much email.

God is engaged and sending out invitations. Sometimes these invitations seem less compelling than anything on my to-do list. Why would I want to say yes to the invitation to rest when I’m already so far behind? Why follow when I could lead? Why accept invitations to weep or to admit that I am wrong or to wait? Saying yes would just slow me down, sabotage my agenda and maybe even deconstruct my ego. This book is about invitations like these: divine invitations we miss or ignore because we’ve said yes to going with the cultural flow. Only free people know how to say yes and no.

The Shape of This Book

My hope is that this book will help you attend to the often hidden, quiet voice of the great Inviter. By saying yes to God’s invitations, may you find the freedom and the courage to be who you were created to be.

This book includes a variety of invitations that have shaped me as a Christ-follower. They are by no means all of God’s invitations, but they are ones that our achievement- and entertainment- addicted society tends to ignore or avoid. I believe these invitations are crucial to a church that is often shaped more by business and social invitations than by God’s invitations.

At the beginning of each chapter is a chart offering an over-view of:

The invitation.

Key related Scripture.

Roadblocks that we might face in saying yes to God.

Awareness that leads us to participate with the Holy Spirit for change.

Practices that give God room to work with us. Many of these disciplines are described in further detail in Spiritual Disciplines Handbook: Practices That Transform Us (Adele Ahlberg Calhoun, InterVarsity Press, 2005).

Each chapter also provides several reflection questions or exercises that can help you explore and open more fully to God’s invitations. They are ways you can RSVP in the moment. They are ways to break lies, start new habits and cooperate with the Holy Spirit for transformation and renewal. “The Spirit and the bride say ‘Come!’ And let the one who hears say, ‘Come!’ Let the one who is thirsty come; and let the one who wishes take the free gift of the water of life” (Rev 22:17).

1 Invitation to Participate in Your Own Healing

We live a long time in order to become lovers. God is like a good parent, refusing to do our homework for us. We must learn through trial and error. We have to do our homework ourselves, the homework of suffering, desiring, winning and losing, hundreds of times.

Richard Rohr

Projects of personal transformation rarely if ever succeed by accident, drift or imposition.

Dallas Willard

My husband, Doug, is an athlete whose body is protesting. He has had numerous knee injuries and torn his Achilles tendon twice. Doctors have operated on him, put casts on him and sent him home, thereby putting the full recovery from his injuries back into his hands and those of a physical therapist. It’s not enough to have the doctor do his or her part; Doug has had to participate in his own healing. He has had to lift weights, ride a stationary bike, exercise and eat right.

INVITATION

To cooperate with the Trinity in my growth, healing and emotional maturity.

SCRIPTURE

“When Jesus saw him lying there and learned that he had been in this condition for a long time, he asked him, ‘Do you want to get well?’” (Jn 5:6).

ROADBLOCKS

—Blindness to what needs mending and healing in me

—Unwillingness to do the hard work that rehabs my soul

—The desire for a quick fix

—Blaming of others for what is wrong with me

—A victim mentality

—Addictive behaviors

AWARENESS

—Notice where I am stuck in patterns of behavior that break relationships.

—Ask others what needs changing in me.

—Notice who I was ten years ago and how or if I have changed at all.

—Notice where I am not free from fears or the need for approval.

PRACTICES

—Ask others for healing prayer, which can increase my awareness of God and his part in my healing.

—Have a relationship with a spiritual director, accountability partner, counselor or spiritual friend, which can help me participate with God on my healing journey.

Doug often commented on the difference between receiving physical therapy and going to the health club. Everyone undergoing physical therapy knew they were broken. No one pretended they were fine. No one hid their weakness; it was obvious. They were in the same boat. And when someone made progress, the physical therapist would whoop out a cheer, and soon everyone in the room would be clapping for the progress. As people participated in their own healing, each step forward gave hope to others.

But Doug couldn’t stay in the rehab clinic forever. One day he was deemed mobile enough to be given the boot. His continued healing was placed in his own hands. He would need to exercise, day after day and year after year, without a cheering therapist beside him. If he didn’t, his protesting body would quickly revert back to its problematic state, and all that work would go down the drain.

Where do you wish Jesus would use magic rather than involve you? How would participating in your own healing draw you deeper into Jesus and freedom?

Whether it is body, mind or soul, we all have to participate in our own healing. Doctors, counselors and pastors don’t wave magic wands over us and cure us. They may save our lives, but then they throw the responsibility for health back on us. It’s not much different with God: God saves our lives, and then many of us treat that salvation like magic. We are safe, we are good with God, we are going to heaven: that’s that.

But God’s salvation is an ongoing invitation to participate in our own healing. This does not mean we earn our salvation; it simply means we taste the fruit of it through participation. Salvation, in the ancient Hebrew sense of the word, means “to heal and make whole.” Unlike other parts of creation, we human beings, as image-bearers of God, have been given the unique task of participating with God as he heals, mends, and saves us and the world.

My Part and God’s Part

The invitation to participate in my own healing came to me just as it came to the man at the pool of Bethesda in John 5.

Soon another Feast came around and Jesus was back in Jerusalem. Near the Sheep Gate in Jerusalem there was a pool, in Hebrew called Bethesda, with five alcoves. Hundreds of sick people—blind, crippled, paralyzed—were in these alcoves. One man had been an invalid there for thirty-eight years. When Jesus saw him stretched out by the pool and knew how long he had been there, he said, “Do you want to get well?”

The sick man said, “Sir, when the water is stirred, I don’t have anybody to put me in the pool. By the time I get there, somebody else is already in.”

Jesus said, “Get up, take your bedroll, start walking.” The man was healed on the spot. He picked up his bedroll and walked off. . . . A little later Jesus found him in the Temple and said, “You look wonderful! You’re well! Don’t return to a sinning life or something worse might happen.” (Jn 5:1-9, 14 TheMessage)

The man Jesus spoke to that day had carved out a life in a community where sickness was the norm. The lives of these blind, disabled, lame and paralyzed folk revolved around a pool that afforded healing, renewal and change. There was one major hitch, however; when the water was stirred up, only the first one in was healed.

Can you imagine what waiting at the pool was like? Did people commiserate, hope or despair? Did they help one another or compete with one another? How long did they think, Maybe next time? Or maybe they dreamed up strategies, such as, What if I help him get in andthen he waits around and helps me in? Or, What if I lie closer to the pool? At some point, the “what ifs” probably got harder and harder to bear: What if no one helps me in? What if I never get in? What if this is all there is?

I wonder about the sick man Jesus met at the pool that day. Did his parents drop him there? Had they initially tried to beat the odds and get him into the water? Over thirty-eight years, had the quirky nature of the “cure” dulled the man’s drive to participate in his own healing? Had life become a string of handouts and disappointed hopes? When did the man begin to define his sickness as “normal”? Did he have an identity apart from his physical condition? Or did he tell himself, I am the paralyzed one who has been here longer than anyone else?

Where in your life are you longing for freedom and health? If Jesus said, “Do you want to get well?” how would you answer him?

When Jesus met the invalid, his tolerable (if unwanted) “normal” had been going on for nearly four decades. Jesus didn’t beat around the bush. He fixed his eye on the sick man and asked a question that hinted at an invitation: “Do you want to get well?”