The Idle Thoughts of an Idle Fellow E-Book

Jerome K. Jerome

• Herausgeber: Jerome K. Jerome
• Kategorie: Gesellschafts- und Liebesromane
• Sprache: Englisch
• Veröffentlichungsjahr: 2016

Beschreibung

Now, this is a subject on which I flatter myself I really am au fait. The gentleman who, when I was young, bathed me at wisdom's font for nine guineas a term—no extras—used to say he never knew a boy who could do less work in more time; and I remember my poor grandmother once incidentally observing, in the course of an instruction upon the use of the Prayer-book, that it was highly improbable that I should ever do much that I ought not to do, but that she felt convinced beyond a doubt that I should leave undone pretty well everything that I ought to do.I am afraid I have somewhat belied half the dear old lady's prophecy. Heaven help me! I have done a good many things that I ought not to have done, in spite of my laziness. But I have fully confirmed the accuracy of her judgment so far as neglecting much that I ought not to have neglected is concerned. Idling always has been my strong point. I take no credit to myself in the matter—it is a gift. Few possess it. There are plenty of lazy people and plenty of slow-coaches, but a genuine idler is a rarity. He is not a man who slouches about with his hands in his pockets. On the contrary, his most startling characteristic is that he is always intensely busy.

Leseprobe

Jerome K. Jerome

The Idle Thoughts of an Idle Fellow

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Table of contents

ON BEING IDLE.

ON BEING IN LOVE.

ON BEING IN THE BLUES.

ON BEING HARD UP.

ON VANITY AND VANITIES.

ON GETTING ON IN THE WORLD.

ON THE WEATHER.

ON CATS AND DOGS.

ON BEING SHY.

ON BABIES.

ON EATING AND DRINKING.

ON FURNISHED APARTMENTS.

ON DRESS AND DEPORTMENT.

ON MEMORY.

     TO     THE VERY DEAR AND WELL-BELOVED     FRIEND     OF MY PROSPEROUS AND EVIL DAYS—     TO THE FRIEND     WHO, THOUGH IN THE EARLY STAGES OF OUR ACQUAINTANCESHIP     DID OFTTIMES DISAGREE WITH ME, HAS SINCE     BECOME TO BE MY VERY WARMEST COMRADE—     TO THE FRIEND     WHO, HOWEVER OFTEN I MAY PUT HIM OUT, NEVER (NOW)     UPSETS ME IN REVENGE—     TO THE FRIEND     WHO, TREATED WITH MARKED COOLNESS BY ALL THE FEMALE     MEMBERS OF MY HOUSEHOLD, AND REGARDED WITH SUSPICION     BY MY VERY DOG, NEVERTHELESS SEEMS DAY BY     DAY TO BE MORE DRAWN BY ME, AND IN RETURN     TO MORE AND MORE IMPREGNATE ME WITH     THE ODOR OF HIS FRIENDSHIP—     TO THE FRIEND     WHO NEVER TELLS ME OF MY FAULTS, NEVER WANTS TO     BORROW MONEY, AND NEVER TALKS ABOUT HIMSELF—     TO THE COMPANION     OF MY IDLE HOURS, THE SOOTHER OF MY SORROWS,     THE CONFIDANT OF MY JOYS AND HOPES—     MY OLDEST AND STRONGEST     PIPE,     THIS LITTLE VOLUME     IS     GRATEFULLY AND AFFECTIONATELY     DEDICATED.

ON BEING IDLE.

Now, this is a subject on which I flatter myself I really am au fait. The gentleman who, when I was young, bathed me at wisdom's font for nine guineas a term—no extras—used to say he never knew a boy who could do less work in more time; and I remember my poor grandmother once incidentally observing, in the course of an instruction upon the use of the Prayer-book, that it was highly improbable that I should ever do much that I ought not to do, but that she felt convinced beyond a doubt that I should leave undone pretty well everything that I ought to do.I am afraid I have somewhat belied half the dear old lady's prophecy. Heaven help me! I have done a good many things that I ought not to have done, in spite of my laziness. But I have fully confirmed the accuracy of her judgment so far as neglecting much that I ought not to have neglected is concerned. Idling always has been my strong point. I take no credit to myself in the matter—it is a gift. Few possess it. There are plenty of lazy people and plenty of slow-coaches, but a genuine idler is a rarity. He is not a man who slouches about with his hands in his pockets. On the contrary, his most startling characteristic is that he is always intensely busy.