Kannawoniwasein: Yougottabekiddingme! Sometimes you just have to vamoose (Englische Ausgabe mit Vokabelhilfen) E-Book

Martin Muser

• Herausgeber: Carlsen
• Kategorie: Für Kinder und Jugendliche
• Sprache: Deutsch
• Veröffentlichungsjahr: 2024

Beschreibung

Yougottabekiddingme! Da fährt Finn zum ersten Mal alleine mit dem Zug nach Berlin – und wird prompt beklaut. Zu allem Übel schmeißt ihn dann noch der Schaffner raus, mitten im Nirgendwo. Aber so lernt Finn Jola kennen, die immer einen flotten Spruch draufhat und weiß, wie man auf eigene Faust in die City kommt. Eine abenteuerliche Reise durch die Walachei beginnt, auf der die beiden einen Traktor kapern, im Wald übernachten, einem echten Wolf begegnen, Finns Rucksack zurückerobern – und richtig dicke Freunde werden. - Ein lustig-actionreicher Roadtrip für Jungs und Mädchen (auf Englisch, mit Vokabelhilfen).

Leseprobe

Martin Muser – Yougottabekiddingme!Sometimes you just have to vamoose

Ins Englische übersetzt von Chantal Wright

Yougottabekiddingme! When Finn takes the train to Berlin all by himself for the very first time, somebody steals his rucksack. Then the conductor throws him off the train in the middle of nowhere because he no longer has a ticket. Fortunately Finn meets the quick-witted Jola who knows how to get to The Big B. They set off on an adventure together and a wonderful friendship begins. Finn and Jola borrow a tractor, sleep in the forest and have an encounter with a wolf – and in the end they even get the stolen rucksack back!

Martin Musers beliebtes Kinderbuch »Kannawoniwasein«, ins Englische übersetzt von Chantal Wright, mit Vokabelhilfen.

Wohin soll es gehen?

  Buch lesen

  Viten

 

For Mina and Mizzi,who grew more quickly thanI could write this story.

Hackmack with the Big Plastic Bag

Finn looked at the empty space next to him and felt pretty excited. It was the first time he’d taken the train all by himself. He’d told his mum and dad over and over again that he was big enough to do it. But Mum had always said not until he was ten. It was still three whole weeks and two days until his birthday. But this was an emergency. Dad was in a rush to make a ton of wildgarlic tofu fritters1 for a spa hotel where the guests paid a lot of money so that they only got healthy things to eat. And because it was such an important order Dad had no time to travel all the way to Berlin with him, the way he usually would.

Dad had phoned Mum and, of course, they had started arguing again, and Dad had shouted into the phone, »Why do I always have to bring him? You could come and pick him up for once!« And then it was almost too late and they had to rush to make it to the train station in Neustrelitz.

The regional express with the two-storey carriage was already waiting. Dad got on the train with him for a minute. Almost all the upstairs seats were empty and Finn sat down in the first group of four seats. Dad hugged him and said, »No-need-to-be-afraid-everything-will-be-fine.« Then he got off again really quickly just before the doors closed and the train departed.

Finn wasn’t one bit afraid. At most, he had a slightly funny feeling in his tummy because everything had happened so quickly and he hadn’t really been able to say goodbye properly. Out on the platform Dad ran alongside the train for a while and waved until Finn couldn’t see him any more.

The brakes made a screeching noise. The train stopped in Fürstenberg. The voice over the loudspeaker said, »Please mind the gap between the train and the platform.«

A few people got out; a few people got on. Through the window Finn could see a man with a beer can2 in his hand. He was in a rush and pushed his way on to the train before the others had got off. The clock on the platform said that it was ten past seven. Behind the station the tower on the castle shone in the evening sun. Finn knew that it wasn’t a proper castle but an old feed factory.3 In East Germany they had made tons of animal food there. Dad had explained it all to him. East Germany was one half of Germany before both halves had joined together again. All this was called reunification4 and had happened quite a long time ago, before Finn was even born.

The man holding the beer can teetered5 his way up the stairs. A large grey plastic bag was dangling loosely from his wrist. Finn thought that the man might be one of those people who collect rubbish making his way through the train. But instead of collecting rubbish, the man dropped his bag on the seat across from Finn and sat down next to it.

»Ey up, little man, how’s things looking?« He undid the zip on his tracksuit top and made as if to clink his beer can at Finn over the table. »Bottoms up6.«

Finn could smell the beer on his breath and quickly looked out of the window. He hated it when people called him »little«. First of all, he wasn’t little; he was the third biggest in his class, and, second, he would never say »Hello, old person« to a grown-up. Though the man didn’t look all that grown-up. He was sitting sprawled across his seat, wearing a faded T-shirt that said hackmack. Was that a name or what?

Finn kept sneaking a look at the man. He had such strange hair, long on top and short at the sides. And there were big black rings in his ears.

The man noticed Finn’s gaze and grinned at him. »Y’all by yerself, like?7«

Finn gave a brief nod and tried not to keep staring at the man’s earlobes.8 The holes in the centre of the rings were so large that you could look right through them. The skin around them was stretched out like an elastic band. That must really hurt.

But Hackmack seemed perfectly fine. He took a big slurp from his beer can, inflated9 his cheeks and burped loudly. »Mouth fart,« he said and pulled a face. »Apologies, but better out than in.« He laughed, and even his laugh sounded like a giant burp.

Finn pulled his rucksack closer. Mum and Dad had told him over and over again, about a thousand times, that if somebody seemed strange, Finn should give them a call. Finn had only ever nodded in annoyance. Yeah, yeah, he knew all that already. Grown-ups are always worried that something might happen. But now he checked inside his rucksack just to be on the safe side.

Everything was there. His mobile phone, his wallet with his train ticket inside and the plastic container with Dad’s special butties.10 Finn took out his mobile and looked at the display with the new background picture. It was a photo of Teps. He had taken the picture while Teps was yawning, and with her pointy teeth she looked a bit like a sabre-toothed tiger.11

Teps … that’s another story. Mum got her from the animal rescue a year ago after Dad had moved out. Parents can be really strange. For years you’re not allowed to have a pet. And then your parents separate and – just like that! – you get a cat. Or they’re busy at work and – just like that! – you can take the train by yourself …

Finn put the mobile phone back inside his rucksack and fastened the zip that had the crocodile keyring attached. For a while he watched the zigzagging of the power lines outside. Then he heard a metallic click. On the other side of the table Hackmack was fiddling with his can of beer. He stretched out his arms and yawned. »It’s really boring in ’ere, innit?«

Finn nodded again without saying anything. Hackmack wouldn’t leave him in peace.

»How about a game o’ cards?«

He pulled a deck of cards out of his jacket and sent the cards flying from one hand to the other. »Cool, eh?’ he said, grinning at Finn. «Watch this. I’ll show you a trick.»

Hackmack lowered his voice conspiratorially and leaned over the table, and Finn could smell his beer breath again. »I can do magic, you see.«

Hackmack held up a few cards and fanned them out.12 »You see the four cards here? Jacks of diamonds, hearts, spades and clubs.«

Finn nodded and shrugged.

»They’re a crew. And together they’re gonna pull off something really big.«

Hackmack put the four jacks together and placed them back on the pile face down.

»They secretly land on the roof of the KaDeWe, the posh department store13 – you know which one I’m talking about, don’t you? – in a helicopter. The first jack goes down to the ground floor and cleans out all the jewellery … all the diamonds, watches, gold …«

Hackmack picked up the top card and put it back at the bottom of the deck. »The second one goes into menswear and nicks14 a really expensive leather coat …« He took the next card off the top of the pile, put it back in the deck and then did the same with the third one. »The third one goes to the fourth floor and picks up an enormous flat-screen TV, and the last one, he goes to the sixth floor – into the delly-ka-tessen … and drinks a bottle of bubbly15 …« Hackmack takes the fourth card and sticks it back in the deck. »But then, suddenly –« Hackmack picked up the deck of cards and opened his eyes wide – »nee-naw, nee-naw, nee-naw, the alarm goes off. The fuzz16 turn up. And, tweedledee, tweedledum, off we pop.«

He tapped hard on the deck with two fingers as though he was trying to warn the jacks that were hiding in there. »And one, two, three, four, out the door! All the lads meet back up on the roof and fly away in the helicopter.« With a sweep of his hand Hackmack picked the top four cards off the deck and held them up triumphantly: diamonds, hearts, spades and clubs. »Amazing, eh?«

Finn nodded. But he wasn’t amazed at all. He knew how the trick worked. Carlo had shown him. But with Karstadt instead of KaDeWe.

Carlo was Finn’s best friend. They had met each other in their mums’ tummies before they were even born. Their mums had been on a course to learn everything you need to know about giving birth. And Mum said that Finn and Carlo had always moved around at the same time, like they were in synch.17 And even though Finn couldn’t remember it, he was sure it was true. But he could remember the card trick. It was actually really easy. At the beginning you just had to hide four other cards behind the jacks so that when you held up the jacks, the other cards were invisible. When you put the cards on top of the pile and returned them to the deck one after another, the jacks actually stayed on top of the pile because you only took the cards that were hidden behind them. Carlo had dropped one of them so Finn had known what was going on right away.

Finn looked out of the window again. The sun was really low on the horizon and he could already see the moon. It was white and round and hung in the sky like a pizza without any toppings. Wind turbines with flashing red lights were turning slowly in front of it. They had lights so that pilots didn’t fly into them by accident. The wind turbines produced electricity. And Dad said that was good for the environment.18 Finn liked the wind turbines. He pretended that they were robots with flashing red eyes. They waved their arms all the time because they were bored from all that standing around.

Across from him Hackmack was drinking the last bit of his beer. He crushed the can and dropped it under his seat.

The train slowed down. The screen at the end of the compartment showed the next stop: gransee.

Hackmack collected the cards from the table and got up. »Watch this, kid. I’ll show you a trick before I take my leave. This one’s a cracker! You won’t have seen anything like this, I promise …« He made a grand gesture, and as he did so, all the cards fell out of his hand. They floated through the air and came to rest across the seats.

Hackmack swore. »Crap, what a mess …«

He bent over and hurriedly picked up the cards. As he bent over, he flashed all of his bottom cleavage.19 That’s what Mum called it whenever Finn’s trousers were at half mast and his bum crack20 peeked out. Finn used to find it funny and sometimes, he let his trousers hang low so that Mum would say it. Now he thought it was embarrassing.21 And he didn’t want to see Hackmack’s bum. He looked away quickly and his glance fell on the ten of clubs, which had landed under the table. He bent over and had to stretch out his arm to reach it. When he finally crawled out from under the table, Hackmack quickly took the card from him.

»Ta22, kid, much appreciated!« He tucked the cards hastily into his jacket, grabbed the plastic bag and threw it over his shoulder like a sack. »I’ll be off then. Check this out. I’ll make meself disappear. Abracadabra …«

Hackmack moved his hand as though he was waving a magic wand.23 As he did so, he walked backwards down the aisle,24 waving his hand around even more. But he didn’t look like he was vanishing into thin air at all. He looked more like a one-armed swimmer moving through jelly. Pretty stupid in any case.

The train juddered25 and came to a stop. Finn could hear the hissing sound made by the doors as they opened. Hackmack had reached the stairs. He waved again, turned round and staggered down the steps in a rush.

Through the window Finn could see Hackmack getting out and walking down the platform with his big bag over his shoulder.

The train started to move again and Hackmack disappeared from view.

Finn was happy that he was gone.

1   wild garlic tofu fritter – Bärlauch-Tofu-Bratling

2   beer can – Bierdose

3   feed factory - Kraftfuttermischwerk

4   reunification – Wiedervereinigung

5   to teeter – taumeln

6   Bottoms up – Hoch die Tassen!

7   Y’all by yerself, like? – Bist’ ganz alleine, ne?

8   earlobes – Ohrläppchen

9   to inflate – aufblasen

10  butties – Stullen

11  sabre-toothed tiger – Säbelzahntiger

12  to fan out – auffächern

13  posh department store – Luxuskaufhaus

14  to nick – etw. klauen

15  bubbly – Schampus (ugs. für Champagner)

16  the fuzz – die Bullen (ugs. für Polizei)

17  in synch – synchron

18  environment – Umwelt

19  bottom cleavage – Hinterndekolleté

20  bum crack – Poritze

21  embarrassing – peinlich

22  Hier: Ta=Thanks

23  magic wand – Zauberstab

24  aisle – Gang

25  to judder – ruckeln

A Conductor Causes Problems

»Tickets, please!«

The train had barely left the station when the conductor came up the stairs. He was wearing a blue uniform and a red tie. Finn went to grab his rucksack – but it wasn’t there. The seat next to him was empty. Huh? The rucksack had been there a minute ago. Finn looked under the table. Confused, he stood up, looked around, kneeled down, crawled under the seat and looked all over the floor. Nothing. The only thing he could find was the crumpled can of beer.

He could hear the conductor’s voice coming from above.

»What’s the matter, young man? Are you trying to hide?«

Finn got up quickly. »No.«

The conductor had pushed his glasses to the very end of his nose. He looked at Finn sternly over the top of them. »Where’s your mum or dad?«

»I-I’m travelling alone,« Finn stuttered.

»Well, show me your ticket then.«

Finn felt hot. What was he going to do? He looked at the conductor and swallowed. »I … it’s in my rucksack.«

»Then you’d better take it out.« The conductor was looking at him the way Mrs Henschke-Pohl did whenever he wrote »it’s« instead of »its« in a dictation.

»It’s not there,« Finn said, and couldn’t care less whether »it’s« was written with an apostrophe or not. »It’s gone … I mean, my rucksack is gone … It was there a moment ago. Here on the seat.«

The conductor wrinkled up his forehead. »Well, well,« he said, »so your rucksack is gone. Where are you going? And how old are you?«

Finn began to sweat. At that moment, he would have been quite happy to have his dad sitting next to him. His dad would explain everything to the conductor and then he wouldn’t ask such stupid questions.

»I’m ten,« Finn replied. »Or I will be in three weeks and two days. And I’m going to Berlin. To my mum.«

»And does your mother know that you’re going to see her?«

What a daft question, Finn thought and nodded. Of course his mum knew. She was picking him up from the station.

The other passengers in the compartment were all looking at him and at the conductor, who was scratching his balding head with his hairy hand. »Does your mum have a name?«

Finn nodded. »Svenja.«

»Svenja what?« the conductor asked.

»Putterer.«

The conductor raised his eyebrows. »Putterer?«

Finn nodded again. He was waiting for the conductor to say, »›Putterer‹ like ›mutterer26‹?« That was what everybody said when they heard his surname for the first time.

But thankfully the conductor didn’t. Instead he said, »Aha. Svenja Putterer. Perhaps we can give Svenja Putterer a call and ask her whether she knows that Putterer Junior is travelling all by his lonesome?«

At that moment Finn remembered that he couldn’t phone his mum. His mobile was in his rucksack! He could feel his eyes filling with tears. The phone was brand new and he had saved up for it himself! He’d got one euro a week from Mrs Buchborn on the fourth floor for taking up her newspaper and carrying down her rubbish.